Chapter X
All Arien felt like he was stuck in a state of constant euphoria now that Soleil was spending time with him.
Willingly.
She was healing and talking and giving him a chance.
Hell, she even smiled at him once or twice. A smile that wracked havoc on his insides, he wished he knew if having a mate always felt this was? Hopeful, giddy, light.
With a new found hope, Arien thought he might just still have a chance.
A chance for happiness with his mate that he'd wanted since before he could remember.
A chance for a new beginning. After all that had transpired in his life, in both their lives, this could finally be a chance for something positive and good.
And maybe if he found his new start, a new place in which to place his hope, S?ren would be encouraged to do the same.
With renewed vigor, Arien was determined to find ways to make Soleil happy.
And hopefully one day, have her be happy enough to stay of her own volition.
I was tolerating Arien. Just for now. And just for my plan. I didn't like him even a little and I didn't plan to trust him even less.
But he was already letting me into the garden and allowing me to make supervised phone calls. I figured that if I could kept this charade up, I'd soon be allowed out the yard and then my escape plan would be properly underway.
The days had been passing by so slowly, and I was simply existing through them - almost as if I was getting used to being here. I hated it.
Arien and I were currently sitting on the balcony, a beautiful breakfast nook overlooking the gardens. There was a spread of so many delicious breakfast foods courtesy of wonderful Constance, with the sun just gently warming us.
It should have been enjoyable, I could tell that in some part of my brain, but I couldn't feel it. The food tasted like food and the beautiful setting could have been anywhere.
There was something wrong with me. I continued to feel like this despite the days going by, despite Arien sometimes doing nice things for me.
Shaking myself from my thoughts, "So why aren't you and your brother in a pack?"
I hope I'd phrased that right. From what I understood, wolves usually lived together in packs, not meant to be solitary animals. No wonder these two were psycho. I needed to find out as much as possible to help my escape plans. Know thine enemy and all that.
Arien shifted uncomfortably, "Well, we left our former pack as teenagers and haven't rejoined one since. I guess we were just happier just the two of us."
He threw an easy smile my way, as if it wasn't a big deal.
Liar.
"Why'd you leave?" I carefully questioned.
A twitch in his jaw - Arien's little tick when he was bothered.
"We just needed to leave. Felt trapped I guess...maybe pack life just wasn't for us."
Again, not the truth.
"I guess I can understand that."
I wanted to probe but he was clearly uncomfortable, very contrary to Arien's usual easy going nature, and I didn't wish to set him off.
He sometimes showed a ripple of that not quite perfect persona when I pushed too hard, and I already had one brother as an enemy.
Already had one brother who instilled a deep fear in me.
I don't think my nervous system could take it if another treated me that way.
I changed the topic, trying to convince him of letting me out, something I'd been trying to get Arien to acquisence on these past few days.
"I still think you should let me head out, even supervised, I need to breath a bit before I go mad."
"You know what, you're right. You probably need to let your wolf out to run-" He hit his hand on his forehead, "sorry that completely slipped my mind."
Let my wolf out to run? No, that's definitely not what I meant. Dammit, I kept forgetting about the werewolf part I was playing.
"No-no that's okay-"
"No it's not," Arien was already bounding up with a silly grin on his mouth, "I'm gonna clear it withS?renright away and we'll be off. This will be fun, I promise."
I was stunned, head spinning for an excuse before I found myself hurrying after Arien.
Dammit.
I caught him just as he slipped into the office doors.
Double dammit.
I didn't want to be here. I hadn't seenS?ren, even briefly, since the incident in over a week. Seems like Arien had actually convinced him to stay away somehow. But I didn't have a choice, I needed to stop this plan before I ended up being found out.
Steeling myself, I pushed the door open, careful to leave it ajar behind me. I wasn't about to end up trapped in here against my will.
Both pairs of eyes turned my way. For a pair of twins, their eyes were completely different. Their entire beings were entirely different.
S?ren remained as inscrutable as ever, I pushed down the feeling to run away, the one that always arose as I found myself near to him.
As if waiting for me to start, I clarified, "I just wanted to say that I don't need to go out for a run."
Arien tried to lighten the mood, "Don't be silly - you must be bursting at the seams by now to let your wolf out, it's been what, 2 or 3 weeks?"
Ugh how had I forgotten about this part - of course these monsters transformed into actual monsters.
"Uhm, my wolf is still fine."
Think better, you need a better excuse Soleil!
Frowning now, Arien tried to reassure me, "There's nothing to be afraid of, I'll be with you Soleil"
Bingo.
"Well I can't help it," folding my arms as if a stance of protection, "I just won't feel safe around your...your wolf. And it's not like you'd let me run alone. What if you lose control or something?"
I tried to make my voice small. It wasn't a complete lie, I never wanted to see either of their wolf forms. I'd seen wolves before, they were huge, reaching shoulder height with some variation.
It would take a mere second to rip my throat out and they were impossibly strong and fast compared to me.
The advantage just wasn't fair. Nothing seemed to be fair in my life for the longest time.
"Oh." An anxious hand through his hair.
Now Arien looked distraught. There was only a tiny twinge within me. I didn't need to feel sorry for him. Am I forgetting everything they've put me through?
Arien didn't know. A tiny part of me whispered.
Whatever, he is the main reason I landed in any of this fucked up situation. He's the one who stopped me at the gate.
Glancing away from how uncomfortable Arien's look was making me, I caughtS?ren looking my way with slightly narrowed eyes. Of course, he was once again noticing everything and not trusting a single word out of my mouth. Whatever, he couldn't prove I was lying.
Then, attempting to somehow lesson the blow, I added, "But I'm really fine. My wolf isn't that active, maybe that's why my healing was also kind of slow."
That only caused Arien to look more pained.
Damn.
While I fully meant to guilt him with the first part, I truly didn't mean this to come out that way.
"I mean, I'm much better now, I swear, everything feels alright," I rambled but abruptly shut myself up.
Again, why was I trying to make him feel better?
I was only using him to get out of here, I didn't need to care about his emotions.
He didn't deserve any concern from me. Not after everything they'd put me through.
It didn't matter if he was nice sometimes, everything else that ahd been done to me, was also partly his fault. And he'd never be absolved of that.
My righteous anger at all of this mottled once more inside of me.
Now Arien was glaringS?ren's way and then upsettly storming out.
Leaving me with the second last person I'd ever want to be left alone with.Great, thanks Arien.As much as he tried to do nice things for me, he always did things like this, not noticing my discomfort.
Like closing doors without thinking that I'd feel trapped.
Like telling me I'd be alone, safe with him, and then havingS?ren there.
Like lettingS?ren do whatever he wanted and being unable to stop him.
And now, leaving me with the man who featured in my nightmares.
"I didn't do anything this time."
I tried to defend myself while slowly heading to the door, no longer wanting to be caught between the two wolves.
"Sure," a barely restrainedS?renbit back.
I hurried my ass out of there, not even bothering to look his way. Crisis averted. For now.
S?ren didn't trust Soleil's explanation. Not one bit.
And he didn't like it either. He didn't like how affected his brother had been by her explanation and ultimate rejection.
How dare she make Arien feel saddened by her ungrateful refusal?
S?ren could feel his insides tightening and twisting up in anger at the scene that had just transpired. The same anger that lashed out at her once before in the library was quickly rising once more. He tried to wrangle it back under control.
He had after all promised Arien not to harm the insidious girl again.
He just didn't know that keeping his promise would take so much restraint.
But that didn't mean he was going to let her ungrateful behaviour go unpunished. Oh no,S?ren just knew that Soleil was lying and planned to find out what she was hiding.
And then he planned to ensure she understood what was expected of her - which was to be a good little mate to Arien.
Even if he hated the insufferable conniving female, she could be molded into a docile mate for his brother.
That he was sure of. It might take a bit of conditioning but he would ensure that was the outcome.
This was what he did best, fixing things for Arien's happiness.
This time wouldn't be any different.
He'd promised himself a long time ago to never see Arien hurt again and yet, that had already happened twice when it came to the girl.
The angerS?rentried to keep at bay unfurled once more, dangerously.