Elizabeth
We wrapped up staging the room, placing the body just so, crafting the illusion of a perfect suicide. We made sure to leave no trace of ourselves behind. With the doors shut, we slipped away as quietly as we had arrived.
“Hey Sunshine, what was all that back there?”
Noah asked as I tossed my gear into the car.
“What do you mean?”
I replied, feigning confusion. He shook his head, a smile creeping across his face.
“Nothing, never mind. I think this is the longest you’ve looked at me without bolting.”
He chuckled, and I felt a twinge of guilt. It was true; I’d been avoiding him ever since Lillian found out everything. The way he hurt my best friend had ignited a fire in me. I had trusted him, and he shattered that trust the moment he made her cry.
I brushed past him as I headed to my car. There was something about Noah’s eyes that stirred a longing inside me, a feeling I had tried so hard to bury. Whenever he was near, those emotions clawed their way to the surface.
“Hey, wait.”
I heard Noah call out behind me, but I kept walking, ignoring him completely. I tossed my bag into the backseat and started the engine.
“Liz, please.”
His voice was pleading, and I fought the urge to turn around.
Just talk to him. Come on, he could be the one to— I cut that thought off before it could finish.
Emotions are weaknesses, and in our line of work, we couldn’t afford those.
Adonis was lucky to have Lillian. I’d seen what love could do—my parents’ “love” had turned into endless fighting and betrayal.
If that’s what true love was, then count me out.
Suddenly, I felt warm hands cradling my face.
“Hey, what’s going on, Sunshine? You just shut down for a sec.”
Noah’s voice was soft as he held my face in his hands.
I took a deep breath, closing my eyes and leaning into his warmth.
His scent—a blend of cinnamon and cloves—wrapped around me like a cool autumn night.
I felt something I couldn’t quite name. What was it about Noah that stirred these feelings deep within me?
“Sunshine?”
He whispered, and that familiar tug in my chest pulled me closer. I searched his eyes, looking for answers to this inexplicable connection. My gaze drifted to his lips, and before I could think twice, I blurted,
“Fuck it.”
I kissed him, and for a heartbeat, he was taken aback. But then he responded, pulling me from my car and pinning me against the side of my Jeep.
“Noah.”
I gasped between kisses as he trailed his lips down my neck. My fingers tangled in his hair, and I heard a low growl escape him when I tugged gently. His eyes darkened, filled with a desperate need that echoed my own. He kissed me again, and I moaned into his mouth.
“Fuck, Sunshine, you’re deadly.”
His voice was husky, and I pressed my body against his, feeling his hands fit perfectly around my hips. It was as if I were made for him.
Elizabeth, remember that emotions are a weakness. Anyone who makes you weak is not your ally.
My father’s words echoed in my mind, and I pushed Noah away, scrambling back into my car.
“Hey, Liz, wait!”
I left him standing there, refusing to look back. Why had I let myself get swept away? What was it about Noah that made my chest tighten? Why did I kiss him? Why did I let him touch me, hold me?
No, I couldn’t dwell on those thoughts. I needed to focus. I dialed Adonis.
“Hey. How’d the mission go?”
He asked, and I sighed.
“We finished, left a note, made it look real.”
Silence hung between us for a moment.
“Where’s Noah?”
He inquired, and I groaned.
“He should have left by now. We wrapped things up and took off.”
More silence. Of all the times for him to go quiet, it had to be now, right after everything that just happened.
“Something happened, didn’t it, Liz?”
I gripped the steering wheel so tightly my knuckles turned white.
“I have no idea what you mean,” I lied, trying to shake off his suspicions.
“So, there was something. You know he hasn’t stopped staring at your picture from the Ren fair? He’s all mopey and sad, Liz, just talk to him.”
The tug in my chest returned.
“Adonis, I don—”
He cut me off.
“Look, I know you have your ways, and I get that, but we’re not our parents, Liz.
We can feel; we aren’t lifeless machines.
How do you think Lillypad would feel knowing you’re still like this?
I know feeling is scary and intense, especially after we’ve turned them off for so long, but I promise, it isn’t as bad as yo—”
I hung up, not wanting to hear more of his “feelings are okay” speech.
He was wrong; he didn’t see it, but he was dead wrong.
Love makes us weak; happiness makes us weak; any emotion makes us weak.
Lillian was the only weakness I could afford; she was my best friend, my anchor when I was at my lowest. She reached out and saved me.
I could only allow for one weakness, and that was it.
“I can’t let Noah become one of those weaknesses.”