Chapter 27
CHAPTER 27
M allory
Everything.
The word spoke volumes yet was as vague as any word in the English language could be. But I meant what I’d said to him. There was nothing else I could say that would capture the sentiments of what had been drifting through my mind for two full days.
Only I’d wanted to toss it in his face, telling Beckett that he wasn’t capable of providing me with anything, let alone everything.
Then Michaelangelo had broken through to the surface and everything had changed. There was that word again.
I knew trusting him or myself wasn’t a good thing to do. Not right now. But God, I wanted to so badly. I needed to feel as alive all the time as I was right now. He slipped his arm under my bottom, holding me tightly against him. His throbbing cock was pressed against my stomach, pulsing, the tip wet from his pre-cum.
His grin was free of the anxiety I’d experienced years before, replaced with an emotion I couldn’t exactly read. When he lifted me again, he didn’t need to command me to position the tip of his shaft against my pussy lips. I did so automatically and was instantly rewarded with the powerful man bringing me all the way down on his cock.
The pressure of having him inside was incredible, my muscles struggling to stretch wide enough. I was breathless, the single moan I’d issued ragged.
He wasted no time taking long strides toward the bed. Somehow, he managed to keep his cock buried deep inside as he crawled onto the comforter, using his strong arm and shoulder muscles to ease me down to the soft cover.
While a portion of his cock remained inside, he hovered over me, planting his hands on either side. Between the glow from the single light and the moonlight streaming in through the window, I was mesmerized by the shimmer in his intense eyes. I could swear the man was looking right through me, grasping my soul and taking it as his own.
Whereas both of us had been eager, refusing to wait for even a few minutes to touch and taste each other, he was now taking his time. I’d never felt so cherished as I did in this moment. His expression always gave clear indication of what he was thinking. Tonight was all about how much he’d missed our closeness, his hunger similar to mine.
Beckett arched his back, driving his cock deeper inside. There was such control with the man, his attentiveness catching me off guard. If I didn’t know better, I’d say he had tears in his eyes. There was such an intense connection between us, such a fierce need that I was fearful I’d combust.
Very slowly he lowered his head, pressing his lips across mine. It was a gentle gesture, adding to the softness and rush of emotions I’d felt when stepping into the bar. Was it true that he was staying in town? Did I want him to?
When I wrapped my legs together, entwining my feet, the answer was crystal clear. Yes, I wanted him in my life. Whatever happened was our future, whatever may happen.
Had he really continued killing to make this happen?
I shuddered from the thought.
He darted his tongue just inside as he pulled out, holding his stance for a few seconds before plunging into me again. We rocked against each other, our lips touching every few seconds, his tongue finding mine more than once. This was about as intimate as two people could get, but it was the extreme closeness that I would never forget.
His actions became rougher and he jerked one arm over my head then the other. With our fingers locked together, he continued fucking me. Our breathing was ragged, almost in a perfect rhythm. I refused to blink for fear this was nothing but a mirage.
As the pressure continued to build, I began gasping for air. The sensations coursing through me were electrified. As usual with him, I was a bundle of nerves, energy and passion, unable to control my body’s reactions to him. The sweep of emotions mirrored the electrified vibrations dancing down the backs of my legs.
He captured my mouth the moment I jerked up from the comforter, snagging a scream as an orgasm rolled through me. I clung to his shoulders, shaking like a leaf from the powerful tingles. He continued pumping deep inside, slowing his rhythm as my body convulsed, my pussy clenching and releasing.
I sensed he was doing whatever he could to hold back, wanting this to last just like I did. As soon as the orgasm passed, I realized just how relaxed I’d become. I lowered my legs, even lolling my head to the side as soon as he broke the kiss.
He chuckled darkly and rolled the top of his index finger down the side of my neck and between my breasts. “Not so fast, Doc. We’re not done by a long shot.” The man was so strong, easily lifting me from the bed, turning me over as if I weighed next to nothing.
When he crowded my space behind me, pressing his swollen cock against my bottom, I threw my head over my shoulder. The feel of his tip being pushed against my asshole didn’t startle me as it had done four years before. I was too far gone, spiraling inside the moment of utter bliss and continued longing.
He didn’t bother cracking his hand against my bottom as a reminder he was in charge. He simply continued pushing his cock into my darkest hole.
The discomfort was just as I remembered, my asshole aching almost immediately. I clamped my fingers around the comforter, tugging and jerking the material as he pulled out, plunging into me again.
All I could concentrate on was the sound of his skin slapping against mine. A filthy and delicious echo that matched the rapid beating of my heart. I felt as if I was floating on air, incapable of thinking and that was just fine by me. All I’d wanted to do for four years was to feel again, to share in the same charged jolts of yearning that had broken through our taped-together barriers. Who knew duct tape could keep shattered hearts and souls together.
I did so adore the guttural sounds he made, which filled my mind with wicked images. I bit my lower lip to keep from crying as he fucked me long and hard.
The man’s stamina was incredible, pushing him into the level of control I’d sensed his body had been fighting. But as with all good things, this had to come to an end. His body stiffened more than mine, his savage sounds more primal in nature.
But I loved every one of them, cinching my eyes shut as he folded his body completely over mine. As soon as his body tensed even more, I squeezed my ass muscles and allowed myself to fall into a sweet moment of ecstasy.
If only what we shared could last forever, but I wasn’t the kind of girl to believe in fairytales.
Time alone.
To talk.
It was a gift and one I refused to take lightly.
“I wish you could have trusted me enough to tell me what you had planned on that mountain.” My words were hollow, as much as they’d been for months after his ‘death.’
“I couldn’t tell you what I had planned, Mallory. The bastards sent to kill me would have figured out what I’d done. The assassins were highly trained, their methods brutal.”
His voice was gravelly, full of angst. “Even years later when the danger dissipated, you couldn’t tell me?”
“By then, I knew it was too late. You deserved better than the shit I’d doled out.”
I rolled over, planting my folded arms on his chest. He had one of his behind his head, using the other to swirl the second glass of whiskey.
“You underestimate what I’m capable of handling, Beckett. I’m stronger than you think.”
He turned his head, offering a slight smile. “You’re the strongest woman I know. But my life wasn’t and likely isn’t fair to you.”
“I don’t need fair. I just need honesty.”
“Which you deserve. My life turned upside down when I went to work for Lucian. I thought I was capable of controlling it, but when I was required to kill the first man, only a small portion of my conscience was left. Isn’t that disturbing as fuck?”
“We all have secrets and have done things we’re not proud of,” I admitted.
He chuckled and rubbed my arm. “What could you have possibly done in your life that wasn’t perfect?”
I raised up, reaching over him to grab my glass of wine. “I killed my boyfriend.”
It took a few seconds for him to react. He narrowed his eyes, cocking his handsome head. “What?”
The wine tasted amazing, but I was still shivering from just saying the words. “It’s true.”
He adjusted his body on the pillows, taking my wine and placing both glasses on the nightstand. When he took my hand into his, my instinct was to pull it away. I didn’t deserve any comfort. The guilt was too great.
“Talk to me. What happened?” He wasn’t asking. He was commanding.
“My relationship with Damen was complicated. I met him when he brought his dog into the veterinary clinic where I was working. I calmed him down and we hit it off. He asked me out for coffee and we became inseparable. We were blissfully happy for months, even talking marriage. But I sensed something was off about him. He never talked about his family and when I asked, he shut down the conversation very quickly. After a few weeks of silence, I couldn’t take it any longer and started trying to learn more on my own. He didn’t like that.”
Beckett narrowed his eyes, saying nothing while he rubbed his thumb back and forth across my palm.
“When he found out, he was pissed, but dropped a few breadcrumbs hoping I would leave it alone. I just couldn’t. We were arguing by that point. Actually, a lot. We’d talked about spending the rest of our lives together and suddenly, he never had time for me. I found out he was seeing someone else, a woman much better suited for his family’s requirements. I was incensed, repulsed, and demanded answers. One day in the car, I blew up. I couldn’t take his lies. The argument was vicious and he wasn’t paying attention to the road.”
I realized I wasn’t choking up like I normally did. How strange. How sad. Maybe I’d finally moved on.
“He wrecked the car,” he said casually.
“Yes. It was a horrible accident, but I only received bruises and scratches. He was killed instantly when his side of the vehicle slammed into a tree. If I hadn’t been arguing with him, he’d still be alive.”
He brought my hand to his mouth, rolling his lips across my knuckles. “You didn’t kill him, Doc. He was driving. You weren’t.”
“But don’t you see, if I hadn’t been so nasty to him, he would have paid attention. The road was curvy, and it was dark. There was some ice on the roads. It’s my fault.”
“You’ve been carrying this guilt for years. You need to let it go. You can’t bring him back and sometimes karma has a way of deciding about a person’s life as to whether they live or die and there’s nothing we can do about it.”
“Then why were you determined to save my life?”
He smirked. “I never said I followed the rules of the universe.”
“Well, you certainly don’t follow any man’s rules, so where does that leave you?”
Beckett rolled me over, pressing the full weight of his body against mine. I placed my hand on his shoulder, drinking in his masculine scent. It felt natural being with him, knowing we had all night. Several nights. And days. Weeks. If we wanted.
And if he was telling me the truth.
That still remained to be seen.
“Somewhere in the middle, Doc. I’ve never done anything the conventional way.” The haunted look in his eyes returned.
“Tell me about your family.”
He lifted a single eyebrow and dared taunt me by nibbling on my earlobe. “My mother was a saint, my father an asshole, and my brother is living somewhere in Tahiti the last I heard. Maybe Africa. At least my uncle was a solid force in my life.”
I laughed and he snickered. “What does that mean? You don’t talk to your brother?”
“Nope. We weren’t close. He joined the Peace Corps right out of high school. At first, I wondered why. It wasn’t long before I realized why he’d escaped.”
“Your dad.”
His sigh was filled with remorse as well as the same irritation I’d heard so many times before. “Yep. Dad was a fucking piece of work. Everything was good while I was growing up. He was an attorney and we lived in a beautiful house. I had all the toys a kid could want. I don’t remember when it happened, but he wasn’t around much and Mother was growing very unhappy. She finally left him and us, embarking on a new life of her own. I didn’t learn until years later he’d tossed her out, telling her he’d destroy her and her children if she returned. Can you believe that?”
“Jesus Christ.”
“Yeah, dear old Dad was the attorney for the Valenti Crime Syndicate. I guess Mother didn’t like that very much. From what I learned, she threatened to go to the police.”
“Do you talk to her any longer?”
The second he laughed, I knew she was dead. “A strange accident claimed her life. I bought it at the time because dear old Dad had convinced both his sons our mother was a shyster and had never loved us. I guess I was just too stupid or na?ve to catch what was going on.”
“He allowed you to leave for the military.”
“I didn’t lie about how he’d handled that. I was into petty crimes at that point and I guess he had a hint of humanity left, not wanting his kid to follow in his footsteps. That didn’t last. He had a hero as a son and that made his fake practice look very good. Yet when I returned, I realized just how bad everything had gotten, the house in foreclosure. The fucker promised my servitude to the Valenti family in exchange for clearing his gambling debt. It was a win-win for everyone since the Valentis acted as if they wanted to clean up their act, but that’s all it was.”
“How did you get lured in?”
He took several deep breaths as he rubbed his fingers down my arm. “Because Don Valenti was more of a father to me than my own father had been. I respected him and the power he wielded. It became easy to look past the horror and I came to realize I wasn’t unlike the man. He groomed me from the start, hoping one day I would take the helm when he retired.”
“One woman and her son really changed everything?”
“Not everything, but it was the icing on the cake.”
“What else? You mentioned there was a woman. Was she special in your life?”
He rolled me over again until my head was hanging off the bed. “Did anyone ever tell you that you ask too many fucking questions?”
“My mother always did.” I struggled in his hold, but the man was relentless, refusing to allow me to get up.
“You do. But it’s time to stop. Right now.” He gave me a playful yet stern look.
“Why?” I shifted back and forth under the covers, biting my lower lip when I realized he was already hard as a rock all over again. The man was insatiable.
Just before he dropped his lips against mine, he whispered in my ear, “Because there are some things you don’t need to know.”
“Not good enough.”
He laughed at my level of defiance.
“Alright then, Doc. How about this? Because I told you to.”