Chapter 26
Chapter Twenty-Six
Oliver
I drop my pen, leaning back in my chair and glancing at the clock on my desk. Normally, I’m willing time to slow down so I can squeeze more into my work day, but today, I’m impatient to go up to my flat and call Callum.
“There’s even more protesters outside the palace today,” Toby says as he enters the room.
“It was always going to happen,” I reply.
The crowd of protesters outside Buckingham Palace has been swelling daily, leading up to the trial.
Ten members of the royal family standing in the dock pleading guilty to bribery and corruption was never going to be good optics for the monarchy. But even I’m surprised by the brutality of the backlash.
“What’s the current polling showing?” I ask briskly.
“It’s definitely not doing good things. Sixty percent of the population disapprove of the conduct of the royal family. And the petition calling for a referendum on the royal family has over fifty thousand signatures so far.”
I groan, rubbing my forehead. “That’s becoming a sizable number.”
British law means that once a petition reaches one hundred thousand signatures, it has to be considered for debate in Parliament.
“I know. We’ll keep a close eye on it. Especially as Harry Matheson keeps reiterating the Conservatives’ call for a referendum.”
“Blimey. This is the last thing we need right now,” I say.
Especially as I’ve just started a secret relationship with the Prince of Wales.
I glance sideways at Toby, imagining saying those words to him.
What would he do? Secretly rally other MPs for a leadership challenge on the basis I’ve lost my mind?
Those last few days at Balmoral, Callum and I snatched time together whenever we could.
The relative emptiness of the castle and the preoccupation of Callum’s family in getting outdoors at every chance meant we found lots of opportunities to be together.
Cheers to the NDAs of the Balmoral Castle staff. That’s all I can say.
But as much as I got to kiss and touch Callum, it didn’t do anything besides fuel my absolute craving to be with him in any way possible.
Every upturn of his lips makes me drunk with happiness. Every laugh that bubbles out of him feels like the elixir of life. Kissing him feels like I’m filling my soul with sunshine.
Bloody hell. Being with Callum has unleashed a poetic side of myself I didn’t know existed.
I was telling the truth when I told Callum I’ve never felt anything like this before. If I’m completely honest, I haven’t felt anything remotely close.
It feels rotten to keep secrets from Toby, who’s supported me politically and personally for the past twenty years. There’s never been anything major I haven’t shared with him.
But I really don’t want to hear his analysis of this particular situation. I don’t want to risk my happiness being snatched away.
Luckily, we have a country to run, and our conversation quickly turns away from the royal family to the latest unemployment figures and our new tax policy. And I put the dilemma of Callum out of my mind for now.
That night, Callum video calls me at our usual time.
“Hey, you,” I answer.
The sight of Callum makes happiness flush through me.
“Hey,” he replies.
“How was the alpaca show?”
“It was good. I actually really enjoyed it. Met some really interesting people. And alpacas.”
“Did you get spit on?”
“Not by the alpacas. I actually learned that alpacas only spit occasionally. It’s their cousins, llamas, you’ve got to be careful of.”
I narrow my eyes. “What do you mean, not by the alpacas? Please tell me no one else spat on you?”
“Well, there were some protesters outside when we showed up, and I’m pretty sure there were some saliva bombs hurled in our direction.” Callum’s tone is matter-of-fact.
His words cause me to shift uncomfortably. I don’t want to think how if this had happened twenty years ago, I would have been one of the loudest voices calling for the end of the monarchy. Perhaps I wouldn’t have been throwing spit bombs, but I would’ve definitely been on the picket line.
But twenty years ago, I had never encountered any members of the royal family.
I’d never sat across from the Queen in a weekly meeting and seen how deeply and passionately she cares for our country.
I’d never witnessed firsthand the personal toll it took to be the Prince of Wales, to have your life dissected while trying to serve.
What do I think about the monarchy now? It feels impossible to tease apart the tangle of my personal and political opinions.
“That doesn’t sound like much fun,” I reply to Callum.
“The thing is, I understand the point some of the protesters are making.” Callum runs a hand through his hair. “I can’t deny the privilege and wealth of my family was built from colonialism and exploitation.”
Hadn’t I made that very argument as a student in the pub back in Oxford?
“That can be said of so much of the wealth of the UK, not just your family,” I feel obliged to point out. “The wealth of so many nations was built off exploiting others.”
Callum sighs. “I know, but sometimes when I see the privilege my family has, the accumulation of wealth and power that came at the expense of countless people in history, it does make me wonder about the ethics of continuing this legacy.” Callum blows out a deep breath.
“But I think…I think I can do things differently when I’m king.
Look to redistribute some of the wealth.
I mean, it seems ridiculous that my family has so much money when there are people in this country struggling to put food on their table.
I won’t be able to touch the assets that belong to the Crown Estate, but I could look at selling some personal assets that belong to my family. ”
“Would you be able to do that without the rest of your family’s permission?”
Callum shrugs. “I inherit it all, apparently. And there are definitely things we don’t need.
I mean, my great-great-grandfather’s stamp collection is worth a hundred million pounds, and my great-grandmother’s Fabergé egg collection is worth twenty million pounds.
No one would miss either of those, but that money could make a difference in people’s lives. ”
“You could do a quick scout around the castles and palaces and have a massive car boot sale,” I suggest.
Callum laughs.
“I’m not particularly popular in my family already, and I’m not sure that would increase my popularity.”
“Based on their own behavior, I don’t think most of your relatives have any right to question you.”
“I know. This whole thing is just so embarrassing for the royal family. I had lunch with Gran the other day, and she’s keeping a stiff upper lip, but I can see how she’s so mortified by everything my uncles and cousins did.”
“We can’t be held responsible for the actions of our relatives. It’s something I learned a long time ago from my mother.”
Callum’s forehead crumples. “Why, what did your mother do?”
“What, haven’t you seen some of the interviews my mother’s done about me? I thought you were a master at googling.”
“Clearly, my Google skills have let me down on this occasion because I don’t remember seeing anything. And I’ve stalked you online quite intensively.”
“Hold on a second.” I scroll to find the link that the masochistic side of me has saved and then send it to Callum.
“Click on it,” I urge.
Callum obeys my instructions, and suddenly, my mother’s strong Essex accent is ringing from his screen.
“When he was three, he had a Superman shirt he refused to take off. I eventually had to wrestle him to the ground, and he screamed like a banshee. But that’s Ollie. He’s always been incredibly stubborn.”
Callum’s eyebrows shoot up. “She told embarrassing stories from your childhood to the whole country?”
“She basically told stories of anything she could think of to earn money. There was always another Oliver angle to exploit. When my breakup from Garett was announced, she was on the front page in the Daily Chronicle speculating about whether I’d cheated on him based on the breakup I had with my first boyfriend. ”
My mother had flittered in and out of my life irregularly, leaving my grandparents to do the hard work of raising me, so at least she didn’t have a normal quota of stories about me. But she had enough.
“Oh my god, Oliver.”
The sympathy in Callum’s voice makes me continue softly, “The thing is, I’m not embarrassed by the stories she tells.
I’m not embarrassed by my life before I entered politics.
” I take a deep breath. “But she’s prepared to sell me out to the highest bidder, which makes it obvious that my mother doesn’t love me. That’s what is embarrassing.”
I’ve never said that to anyone before. I’d put on a stoic front when it happened, and Garett never tried to peer underneath to see my real feelings.
But it hurt.
The one person who was supposed to love me unconditionally in this world happily sold me out.
“It’s not a reflection on you, you know that, right? It took me a while to work that out with Cliff. It’s a reflection of who he is, not me.” Callum’s voice is gentle.
“I know that logically. Somehow, it’s harder to accept emotionally though.”
“You deserve to be loved so much more than that.”
“I wonder where I could find someone to love me,” I say.
Callum gives a small grin. “I don’t think you have to look very far.”
I snort. “You don’t have to look very far to find someone who loves you either,” I reply.
Callum’s grin fades, and we stare at each other through the screen.
“I wish I could kiss you right now,” he says.
“I wish that too,” I say softly.
He’s so close. That’s the thing. As the crow flies, there’s less than a mile between us.
But he might as well be on Mars. Buckingham Palace is currently surrounded by protesters and paparazzi. And if British journalists get even a slight hint of our relationship, the consequences will be dire.
It’s too risky.
“You’ll just have to pretend I’m kissing you,” Callum says.
“Do I get to pretend which part of me you’re kissing?” I ask.
Callum straightens. “This isn’t an attempt to have phone sex with me, is it?”
“I’m up for it if you are.” I adjust myself. “In fact, I’m definitely up for it.”
Callum laughs, and it’s like a balm to my soul.
“You actually think phone sex with me would be sexy? You know how much I ramble when I’m nervous. I’ll probably start talking about the history of lubricant.”
“I’m actually interested to know the history of lubricant.
Besides, nothing about you could ever turn me off.
” My voice is definitive. Up until now, sex and love have been in two separate categories for me.
Garett and I were still having sex until I caught him cheating, even when it was becoming increasingly apparent we could barely tolerate each other’s presence.
But my physical relationship with Callum is so intertwined with how I feel about him, and I get the feeling it’s the same for him. Not getting to touch him is so difficult.
“I miss you,” he whispers. There are tears in his eyes, and I understand. There are moments of this that are unbearable. When my need to be with him defies all logic and flirts with the boundaries of my sanity.
I didn’t know this kind of love could exist.
And I still don’t know how I’m going to keep it now that I’ve found it.