32. Ned #3
Ned quickly gathers her and Peggy’s plates and crusts. “Kitchen trash?”
“Please,” Jess says. “Under the sink.”
“We don’t even have to go yet,” Liesl says.
“We ought to,” Abbot says and Ned eyes her as she sighs again.
Outside, she taps at her phone, even as Ned hugs Steve and Jess goodbye. Is this what he has to look forward to when Peggy’s a teen? Hot and then cold and then colder still?
Liesl starts toward the dark shape of Abbot’s car as Ned ushers Peggy down the steps.
“Say bye,” he coaxes Peggy. “Abbot’s driving back to Portland tonight, and Liesl’s flying home. Remember how I told you that?”
“Bye,” she says obediently to Abbot and waves to Liesl.
Ned’s heart squeezes a little when Liesl doesn’t wave back.
“Liesl,” Ned calls down the street. “Can I say goodbye to you?”
She crosses her arms. “I guess.”
“You okay, kid?” Ned asks.
“Fine.” Oh hell does she sound like her brother. Looks a little like him too, with her forehead pinched like it is.
“Won’t see you for a bit,” Ned says, and maybe it’s too much to hope for a hug, because she hunches in on herself. “You gonna come down the Cape?”
“Maybe.”
“Don’t you want to?”
“Henry said you said you’d come this summer.”
“To the Cape? Yeah, we go every year and I thought you wanted to come with us,” Ned says. “It’s right on the beach, and you can help me beat Pat at volleyball.”
Nothing. Just her eyes on him and the set of her jaw.
“Not a volleyball fan?” Ned asks. “I never said this, but between you and me, I need your help because your brother should probably stick to statistics, not venture into sports.”
Not a laugh at that, or even a smile.
Ned ducks closer. “What’s going on?” he asks, pitching his voice low and confidential.
“Not come to the Cape. Come to Switzerland,” Liesl says. “To see me.”
“I—he did?”
“He said you’d tell me yourself, but you haven’t.”
“Oh.” Ned straightens. “I guess I’m not entirely sure of that trip yet.”
“But he said.”
“Right,” Ned agrees. Who hasn’t Abbot told? Ned’s credit card company, though wouldn’t they just be thrilled to see yet another charge that will accumulate interest while Ned tries and fails to pay off the balance.
“Aren’t you?” Liesl asks.
“I would love to,” Ned hedges.
“That’s what you said last year.”
“I did.” Ned nods slowly. He sure did. He’d been so excited too, until the fun of this imagined trip touring the Alps with his gorgeous boyfriend gave way to the actual reality that no way in hell was he going to be able to make that happen.
Peggy tugs at his sleeve. “I’m cold.”
“Yeah, let’s get you in the car,” Ned says, but Liesl’s still looking at him, an accusation in her face.
Ned turns to Abbot, but Liesl beats him to the question he’s forming. “You said,” she tells him. “You promised, about this summer.”
“Yes, of course,” Abbot says. “Ned, this summer in Switzerland. Liesl wants to make sure you’ll come.”
“Like I care,” she mutters.
“Come to Switzerland,” Ned says, like he’s checking they’re all on the same page about where exactly he’s supposed to buy plane tickets to.
“Aren’t you?” Liesl asks.
“I…” he starts, and he’s ready to defend himself, he realizes.
Which he shouldn’t have to do, because he didn’t ever tell her he’d go, and whatever Abbot said to her is a hell of a lot more of a guarantee than Ned ever made.
He’s a little mad, he finds, a dim burn of it kindling in him. Because what is he supposed to say to Liesl now? He can see the disappointment on her face that he never meant to put there.
But when he turns to Abbot to fix this, Abbot has the same creased forehead. “You don’t want to come?”
“Of course I do,” Ned says quickly. He bends down to her, so he can look her in the eye, not tower over her. “Liesl, I’d love to come, but I don’t think I’m going to make it this summer. I’m really sorry. Maybe next year?”
“That’s what you said last summer,” Liesl says.
“I know,” Ned says gently. Yeah, he very much remembers, thanks, Abbot. “I wish I could hang out with you and have you show me all around, but we’re going to have to wait.”
“Why?”
Again, Ned looks up at Abbot, but the same question sits on his face.
“Liesl,” he starts, his tone gentle.
She turns away, shoulders drawn up, opening Abbot’s passenger door before Ned can stop her.
“Wait,” he calls, but it’s to the door slamming shut and the glow of her phone as she bends over it, ignoring him.
“Daddy?” Peggy asks.
“Yeah.” Ned’s hands feel too empty, so he scoops her up, a warm and reassuring weight against him.
“It’s chilly.”
“I know,” he says. “We’re going. Abbot—”
“This will be the third time you’ve said you’d come, and then haven’t,” Abbot says, which is really different than I’ll talk to her or Give her a second and she’ll get back out.
“But—”
“Are you ever going to visit?”
“Yes, of course I am.”
“When?”
“I don’t know,” Ned says and hears how his words carry an irritability he didn’t quite mean.
Or he did, maybe, that thick exasperation heating through him.
“I want to go now,” Peggy says.
“You don’t know or you don’t want to?” Abbot asks.
“I want to,” Ned repeats, and hasn’t he said this? He’s said this.
“Then can’t you tell her you will?” Abbot gestures toward the car and Liesl inside it.
“It’s not that simple,” Ned says and that’s a real snap in his tone.
He closes his eyes for a moment, drawing a long breath in through his nose.
“I’m sorry,” he gets out. He leans toward the car, mindful of Peggy’s weight, and calls through the window.
“Liesl? I’m sorry I can’t come, but have a good trip home, okay? ”
Nothing. Not a nod or even a cut of her eyes toward him.
“I’m glad I got to see you. Love you. Bye, kid,” he tries one last time.
She still ignores him.
“Abbot—”
“Can you tell me why?”
“Abbot,” Ned whispers, tipping his head toward Peggy.
Not now, he means. He needs to do some math, first of all.
And then disappoint Peggy, before he starts disappointing everyone else too.
Liesl, Abbot, and his parents, he’s sure.
He’ll have to beg them to stay. He’ll host whoever these people are who are coming.
Show them around, make them pancakes, whatever they want as long as he can stay in the house too.
“I want to know,” Abbot says. “You told me you wanted me to talk, and yes, Ned, we need to. I want to. I will, so won’t you?”
“What about the house?” Ned asks. “You didn’t even tell me you were looking at it.”
“I told you. I have to live somewhere.”
“Are you coming over tonight?”
“Can you tell me why you apparently aren’t visiting us this summer?”
“I need more time,” Ned says. “Listen to me, please.”
“I am,” Abbot says, but he’s not, and Peggy’s squirming, and Liesl’s still staring at her phone.
And they do have to go, because Abbot checks his watch and then opens his car door.
“Later,” Ned calls to him, but if Abbot hears, he doesn’t answer, and it’s a sour feeling to watch them drive away.