Chapter 15
Devon
I knew she was avoiding me, and that had to end. I understand her nervousness about being in the office, but she also needs the money, and I know that. Which is why when she showed up tonight, I actually gave her things to do.
I handed her a stack of files I pulled out just before she got here, and mixed them all up so she had to refile them for me. That’s what she’s doing now while I research a little more. I’m so focused on the computer screen in front of me that I don’t notice when she comes back into the office.
But then I feel her gaze on me and pull my own from the screen in front of me.
“All done?” I ask.
“Yeah. Wasn’t that hard.”
“It’s still work.”
“Are you going to tell me why you gave me this job if you never actually have work for me to do?” she asks. I knew that was coming, but I thought I could avoid it for a little while longer.
“You needed a job.”
“Yeah, so do a lot of people. In fact, I know of a few who applied for this position.” Fuck, of course she does.
“And they weren’t right for the job,” I tell her point-blank.
“Neither was I.”
“How do you mean?” I ask cocking my head to study her.
“I have no qualifications, Devon.” Now I sigh. Might as well tell her the truth now, right?
“I created this job for you.”
“What does that mean?”
“I wanted to be closer to you, so I created a job for you,” I admit to her. She stares at me, not saying a word at first. It’s almost as if she’s gathering her thoughts before she begins to rip my ass for me. And she has every right.
“So this job isn’t real?”
“It’s real. You get paid.”
“And you get what?” Now I grin at her.
“Your company.”
“You’re fucking kidding me right now, right?” I shake my head and fold my hands, resting them on the desk in front of me.
“You needed a job. I gave you a job. I needed to be closer to you, and that’s exactly what I got. It’s a win-win.”
“Jesus, Devon. There is something seriously wrong with you.” I laugh.
“No, there isn’t. I want what I want, Caydence. And as a man in power, I tend to get what I want. It wasn’t a hard decision to make. You needed work, I needed you.” Caydence raises her hands to cover her face as if she’s trying to reason this out.
“And you couldn’t have just asked me out like a normal guy?”
“I could have, yes, but this is better, isn’t it?” She blows out a breath as she lowers her hands and looks at me.
“I don’t know what I’ve gotten myself into with you,” she admits.
“What do you mean?”
“You’re … you’re fucking intense for one. You killed someone right in front of me and don’t seem to care. What is it you want with me?”
“Your time. Your love. Your heart.”
I know this isn’t easy for her to understand, and there are times that it’s even hard for me to comprehend.
I’m not used to feeling like this. I’m not used to what Caydence does to me.
I’ve never had a woman make me feel so fucking weak and yet empowered all at the same time.
This shouldn’t be happening, yet it is, and I can’t stop it, not that I would. I can only go with it.
“It’s late. I should go.” She begins to shove her things into her bag. I push out of my seat and walk around the desk, pulling her to her feet.
“You’ve never been with a guy like me, Caydence. You never will, for that matter. But I’ve never been with a girl like you either. One who has the power to fucking break me, and I won’t lie, that’s scary.”
She stares at me as if I’ve lost my damn mind, and by telling her that, I just may have.
“You’re scared?” she asks softly.
“Of you.”
“Why?”
“I just told you why. You have the power to ruin me, and there would be nothing I could do to stop it.”
“Because of what you did? To that guy?” I cup her face in my hands and shake my head.
“No. Because of how you make me feel. How you make me want things I didn’t know I wanted.”
“What do you want?”
“A life. Love. Something that can never be broken. I want to love so hard that it fucking hurts. I want to love you so much that I can’t breathe when you aren’t with me.
I want to feel my heart being ripped from my chest every time I have to say goodbye to you.
” I see the tears as they well up in her eyes, and I know that’s the kind of love she wants too.
She wants it all just like I do. I know I’m the one to give it to her, no matter what she thinks of me.
“That’s really deep, Devon.”
“You asked what I wanted, and that’s it.”
“And you have some crazy idea that’s with me?” she asks.
“It’s not a crazy idea when it’s true. I already hate walking away from you, Caydence. I want you by my side all the time.”
“That’s not possible.”
“It is, but you wouldn’t agree to it. Not now anyway.”
“What’s that mean?”
“Nothing. In time, things will change. We’ll grow closer, just like I want us to.”
“Devon, I don’t know about all this,” she admits.
“You don’t have to know. I’m not changing my mind, and I’m not letting you go.”
“You can’t hold me hostage,” she laughs slightly until she looks me in the eye. “Oh, God. You’ve thought about it, haven’t you?” I nod once.
“I won’t lie and say I didn’t. The thought of you begging me for the freedom you’ll never have did do a little something to me. But after I thought about it, I wanted you to want me too.”
“What if this is too much for me?” she pushes.
“Too bad, baby. I already told you, I’m not letting you go.” Now I lean down and press my lips to hers. At first, she doesn’t respond, and I think I may have pushed her too far, but after a second, she begins to kiss me back. I knew she wanted me just as much as I wanted her.
Things with her are just going to take a little time.
And I have time. Time to wait. Time to show her what she means to me.
Time to show her I’d do anything for her.
She doesn’t know it yet, but the lines have all blurred for me.
Fiction and reality are now one in my mind, and there is no limit to what I’d do for her.