Chapter 10 Charlie
Charlie
My heart is thrumming as I get ready to meet Ryder at the Good Morning Vancouver studio. He steps out of the back of a black Tesla in a black suit as I walk up to the glass tower downtown, and my heart stops. I’m not sure why I’m here. God knows I thought of skipping this event, but I couldn’t.
“Good morning, Charlie,” Ryder says, stepping onto the sidewalk.
“Morning.” I avoid looking at him because it physically hurts and turn to the door of the glass tower downtown.
“How did you sleep?” he asks, catching up to me.
“Fine.” I lie.
“And the kid. He’s okay?” Ryder’s dark eyes cut to mine, and he pushes open the building’s glass front door. Towering over me, the light scent of his cologne makes my knees weak.
I pull my gaze away from his and walk into the building.
“Yeah, he just gets nightmares sometimes.” Which caused him to pee in the bed at his cousins, which mortified him.
I almost didn’t make it here this morning because Pettie was so upset.
He wanted to go home, and he wanted me to stay with him.
After I talked him down this morning with very little sleep, he seemed to come around.
Zane and my cousins were kind to him and offered to take him to the exhibition, which normally would have thrilled him. He reluctantly agreed. Not that I would tell Ryder any of this at this moment. Though the way he is looking at me is unleashing a tsunami of emotions inside me.
Ryder said he wanted a planet for his kids to live on.
He told me that his ideal job would be to parent.
He could have kicked me in the chest with a boot.
Maybe he has changed. Maybe things could have been different between us.
If only he didn’t break my heart and his family didn’t devastate mine, and I spent most of my twenties hating him with a passion.
My father was a big risk-taker, but he always wanted the best for us and loved us. Seeing Mom suffer the way she did when we lost everything and then had his health fail on top of it was soul-destroying.
Though I’m thankful every day that I made it through university.
Mom and I supported each other all the way.
She worked at the grocery store when she wasn’t watching Pettie, and I worked at a coffee shop between studying and classes.
We lived in a studio. It was rough, but we made it, and now I have a very well-paying job, which I can’t sacrifice.
However, thanks to the wedge between us, I could never take Ryder’s job offer.
As a high-powered publicist, I could go off on my own, worst case.
If I took a job with the Lotus Club, and it didn’t work out, I’d lose my connections in LA while tying my future to a corporation owned by a recluse and a wild card.
Ryder is an attention-seeking playboy at heart, even if he’s matured like fine wine. He’s still brash and impulsive despite his confidence and charm outshining his flaws. His thoughtfulness, his… ugh.
“That’s too bad about the nightmares. Has it been happening for very long?” he asks as we walk into the elevator.
“I don’t know.” I frown, staring ahead, trapped in the elevator with him. It’s hard to breathe. “What I mean is, all kids have nightmares from time to time.” I cover up my first comment. It makes me sound like a horrible parent, which I’m not. I just wasn’t hearing him.
“How old did you say Pettie is?” His gaze cuts into mine again, and my heart jackhammers.
I look away. “I didn’t, and you should focus on your speech. It’s very important you win the audience over.”
“Yeah, I don’t think I’m doing that speech. I’ll improvise. Go at it on my own because that’s what you and I do, right? Whatever the hell we like.”
“What are you talking about?”
The elevator dings. We’ve arrived at our stop. I take a step forward, and I’m ready to beam it out of there when he swipes his security card and stabs a button on the wall. The door slams shut, and he keeps his finger on it.
“I asked you how old Pettie is. Tell me, and I’ll open the door,” he says, too close for comfort.
“You’re acting strange.”
“Really, because I find your behavior very hard to understand. Lee doesn’t even know you have a kid, and he’s one of your best friends. Why so secretive, Charlie?”
“We’ll be late for a very important appearance. This is not the time,” I say.
“Not the time?” He nods. “Interesting. How old is Pettie? If you don’t tell me, I’m not going on that show, which shouldn’t bother you unless you have some personal reason you don’t want me and my family to fail when you should dance on our graves.”
The door is dinging and hammering shut, and he shows no sign of relenting. “I’m serious,” he says. “If you don’t tell me how old he is, I’ll leave now.”
“Fine, he’s seven, okay? Happy?” I blow out my breath, my cheeks burn, and my eyes sting at what I’ve just revealed and how painful it’s been to keep it from him.
“Am I wrong, or was the last time we hooked up eight years ago? I hope you had a quick rebound relationship and haven’t lied to me. Though I made sure that no one else dated you, and you were studying all the time. So, did you date anyone else around eight years ago?” he asks.
“No.”
Pain rips across his face. He nods up and down, slowly steaming. “That’s why you care about my family’s legacy. It’s not because you care about me. It’s because I have a son. The only heir to this billion-dollar empire.”
My throat closes. “I had to protect him.”
“From me?” Pain tears at his brow.
“You said it yourself. I should dance on your grave after what your family did to mine. You also broke my heart.”
“So you thought you’d fuck me over?”
“This isn’t about you. You were in no shape to be a parent. You are still acting like you are immune to consequences!”
“And you lied to me and took everything that is mine, including you. You should have been my wife ages ago, and we wouldn’t be having this conversation!
” He releases the elevator door and storms through it, leaving me shaking and sobbing.
I wipe at my eyes and duck into the bathroom when he straightens his lapel and smiles at the admirers who crowd around him.
Of course, no one notices me in his shadow.
I look at my running mascara in the mirror and red face and dab a wet paper towel under my eyes.
Ryder hates me. I always knew this would blow up in my face.
Mom warned me. But I wanted to tell him at the right time.
I planned to one day. I was just so angry with him and his family and what they did to my parents.
Maybe it wasn’t reason enough to keep his son from him.
Maybe I’m a horrible person and no better than the clients I cover up for.
But facing Ryder wasn’t an option. I hated him.
I wasn’t ready, and I’m still not. I could have handled it better instead of only thinking about work and survival.
Maybe Ryder would have been a good father, after all, and I robbed Pettie of it.
But what Ryder’s family did was unforgivable.
Pettie deserved something from the Lotus Club after it swallowed our family’s assets whole.
Not that I wanted anything from the Alexanders.
Despite that, Ryder still makes my heart palpitate and my reproductive organs ache.
I leave the bathroom and walk into the film studio where Ryder is staring intensely into the mirror as a woman brushes his cheeks with powder. She smiles at him, but he only nods crisply. His jaw is twitching, it’s so tense, and his hands clasp so tightly his knuckles turn white.
“Ready, Mr. Alexander?” A person with a headset greets Ryder and leads him to the studio. This is a complete nightmare. I watch him with my heart in my throat. His glassy eyes are hiding pain, his smooth smile fighting tension. I don’t know what the fuck he’ll say or do.
It’s the first time in my career I’m letting a cannon loose. This can’t go well. Not with the fury radiating off him. I’m terrified of what someone as reckless and angry as Ryder might say.