Chapter 9
NINE
Despite saying good night to Calla right after I walked in, I couldn’t stop watching her. My eyes kept drifting back to her table, as if pulled by some invisible force. It was slow torture, seeing her so at ease while different men gravitated to her, and all I could do was sit back and let it happen.
You’re her boss . You’re too old for her. You would both lose your jobs if you crossed that line. The words echoed in my head, becoming my newest mantra. But fucking hell, watching her was the purest form of temptation, and I was just enough of a masochist to indulge.
The men seated around my table continued laughing, utterly oblivious to my predicament. Outside of the office, I had no real ties to them; most were junior agents who asked if I wanted to join them as they celebrated a big win. Typically, I would have said no, but with Calla’s perfume still lingering in the air and that red lipstick altering my brain chemistry, I agreed. I was in dire need of a distraction.
And, as luck would have it, they dragged me to the same bar as her.
I felt guilty about not introducing myself to her companion, too focused on the woman who plagued my thoughts. I watched their interactions, curious about how they knew each other. It seemed like they were related. They had the same smile and honey-brown eyes, but nothing about the blonde woman called to my soul like Calla did.
She was a balm to my banal world, igniting the shades of gray into vibrant hues.
“Theo?” one of the men across the table called out to me. I think his name was Harry? Maybe Hunter? I didn’t care enough to remember, which probably reflected negatively on my leadership, but at the moment, he was nothing more than a distraction, taking my attention away from where it really wanted to be.
As I turned to him with an unamused look, he cleared his throat. “We’re going to head out to another bar. You in?”
When I debated continuing my night, taking myself out of Calla’s orbit, her friend’s phone rang, and she hurried to take the call. She spoke in a hushed tone for a minute and then gave Calla an apologetic look. With a kiss on her cheek, the blonde rushed out the door.
I watched Calla for a moment longer, wondering if she would be leaving as well, but she surprised me when she called for another drink. With a smile on my lips, I shook my head. “I’m going to call it a night. Go have fun. I’ll settle the tab.”
With an excited cheer and many claps of thanks on the back, I was wonderfully alone.
But I had no intention of staying that way.
I slid over to the now-empty barstool next to Calla, watching as she swiveled her straw in her drink. She turned to me, the sly smile from earlier returning. It was different than her usual look, a wide grin that took up almost her entire face. Calla was not a person who gave out half-hearted smiles for the hell of it. When she was happy, it was obvious to the world.
But this look was even more intriguing.
“It's about time, Sunshine.” Calla turned to face me fully. “I was wondering if you were going to come back over here.”
“Were you hoping I would?” I asked, lowering my voice so she had to lean in closer to hear me. That same alluring scent overwhelmed my senses, shooting straight to my groin. Fuck, how long had it been since I wanted someone like this? Sex lately had become as much of a chore as everything else in my life—just a checkmark on the list of the things I needed to get done.
But sitting this close to Calla, her knee pressing up against my thigh, was enough to send me spiraling, a primal need taking over.
“Of course I did,” she answered. “You never got to meet my sister.”
“That’s who you were with?” I glanced toward the door. “She left in quite a hurry. Something you said?”
“Nope,” Calla laughed. “One of her clients has a crisis.” I must have frowned at the statement, because she waved me off. “It’s fine. She hung out longer than I expected. Usually, she doesn’t even make it through the first drink before work calls her away.”
“Are you close?” I asked, although I wasn’t sure why I cared. There was something about Calla that made me curious, and I’d developed a need to know everything about her.
Calla shrugged, motioning to the bartender for another drink. “We used to be, but now it feels like we’re ships passing in the night. It sucks because she’s the only person I have in the city. ”
“Not exactly.” Calla arched her brow at my words. “You have me.”
She laughed, the sound light and ethereal— intoxicating . “No offense, boss, but it’s not like I can call you to grab drinks if I’m feeling lonely.”
“Why not?”
She shook her head. “Well, for one, I work for you. I think us becoming drinking buddies might raise some questions.” She had me there . “And also, you seem to live in the office most nights. Even when you’re not there, you’re thinking about work.”
“I’m not thinking about work right now.”
“What are you thinking about?”
How your lipstick would look smeared on my cock . I reared back, trying to rein in those fantasies. Being this close to Calla was veering us into dangerous territory. My imagination was already running rampant before this moment. It would be even worse now that I was able to smell her shampoo, the subtle scent of wildflowers filling the space between us.
I shook my head, trying to get myself under control. This couldn’t happen. Even if the office didn’t have a strict no-fraternization policy, I’d never been open to those types of relationships—too close for comfort.
Steering the conversation back to neutral territory, I asked, “What brings you out tonight?”
Calla’s face fell, playing with her fingers. “I’m trying to meet someone.”
Fuck. I cleared my throat, wishing I had more than two drinks before coming over here. “Why?”
“I have no idea,” she laughed. “If I tell you the truth, will you promise not to make fun of me?”
“Absolutely not. ”
“Theo!” she laughed, smacking me on the leg. “You’re supposed to say yes!”
I shrugged, and my arm found itself on the back of her chair. For a moment, I thought she’d shy away or make a comment, but neither of us made any attempt to move. “You know I’d never lie to you, Calla. If you say something ridiculous, I can’t promise I won’t use it against you.”
“That’s it—now you’ll never get to know.”
I leaned in, loving the way she shivered when I spoke into her ear. “C’mon, Calla. You know you want to tell me.”
“Fine.” She pushed a breath through her lips and stared up at the ceiling. “I guess I’m tired of waiting for the real thing to show up, so I thought I’d try to put myself out there, see what the city has to offer.”
“No luck?”
“None,” Calla chuckled. “Honestly, if this is what I have to do to meet someone, I’d rather stay single forever.” She sipped her drink. “What happened to that old-fashioned kind of love? You know, the moment—when you lock eyes across a crowded room and the world stops moving? And you just know that this is your person. That the universe has aligned for you two to find each other.”
I snorted. “You’ve been watching too many movies.”
Calla chewed on her lower lip. “Maybe.”
I hated the look on her face and wished I had the words to make it alright, but we were on opposite sides of the coin. She was looking for true love, and I was pretty sure it didn’t exist. Love was a series of choices, about hoping you’d find someone who best checked the boxes you needed most. There was nothing fated about it, just dumb luck and poor decision-making.
But instead of spewing my usual rant, I let down my walls a little bit, wondering what it would be like to see the world through Calla’s eyes—to view each experience as an exciting possibility instead of waiting for it to fail.
“Have you been in love before?”
Calla scrunched her face. “Not really. I thought I loved my high school boyfriend, but it was more friendship than anything else. That’s the closest thing I’ve had to something serious.” She glanced up at me. “Don’t get me wrong, I’ve dated. But I don’t see the point in continuing something if it’s not going to work. If you don’t feel that…” Her voice trailed off, searching for the right word.
“Chemistry?”
“Yes!” she exclaimed. “But it’s more than that. Your person should make you the best version of yourself, don’t you think?” I grimaced, thinking back to my marriage. While it started great, we did the opposite, bringing out the angry, vindictive sides of each other. Hell, even two years after our divorce, we were still bringing out the worst in each other.
“I don’t want to settle for anything less than that, so I guess I’ll be waiting for a little bit longer.” She nudged my side with her elbow. “Know anyone you could set me up with, boss?”
My fists clenched as I imagined Calla grinning up at someone else. I wanted to be the sole recipient, to hoard her smiles all for myself greedily. But as much as I was a selfish bastard, I would never drag her down to my depths. She was light, pure, and full of heart. I would never be able to give her everything she needed or deserved.
I shook my head. “No one who deserves you, Calla.”
“Aww, Sunshine.” She placed her hand on my arm. “That might be the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.”
I reached out, placing my hand on top of hers. A breath escaped me as I felt the softness of her skin, wondering what her hands would feel like on other parts of my body. “I mean it, Calla. You’re right not to settle for something less than you deserve.” I inhaled slowly. “I hope you find it.”
“Theo…” Her eyes flicked down to my lips for a moment. Fuck, the temptation to claim her mouth was overwhelming, to taste the alcohol from her drink on her tongue, to swallow her moans of pleasure. As if able to read my thoughts, we both leaned in, our noses briefly brushing. My hand reached up, brushing an errant curl behind her ear.
Something about the move must have snapped the tether, because Calla jumped back, putting some much-needed space between us. She quickly gathered her belongings, throwing down a couple of twenties on the tabletop. “I, uh, should go. Devyn’s probably home by now.”
“Let me give you a ride.” I stood at her side. “My driver can be here in a couple of minutes.”
“No, no, thank you,” Calla said, walking quickly over to the door. “I’ll be fine. Just…” She sighed, staring at me for a long moment. “Good night, Theo.”