Chapter 29 Lola
LOLA
Rowan is hard against me when I wake up the next morning, and I can’t stop myself from climbing into his lap, easing him inside me, waking him up fully with kisses over his face, the scruff of his beard, his broad, hairy chest.
He smells like himself, like pine and cedar and outdoors. Fresh and simple, and I hope my bed is drenched in the scent by the time he leaves.
His hands settle on my waist, and he guides my movements, making slow, sleepy noises of approval as we move together, waking up tangled in one another just as we slept.
When we’re finished, we move quietly to the bathroom together, showering under too-hot water, and though we’re touching everywhere, there’s no time for anything else.
“The Ecotra ceremony is today,” I say when we step out. “But I—”
“Lola.” Rowan takes my face in his hands and looks into my eyes. “I want you to take it. Follow your passion.”
I shake my head against his palms, reaching up and hooking my hands around his wrists. “This isn’t my passion. I found it up there.” I jerk my head in what I think is the direction of the mountain, but the smirk on his face tells me that I wasn’t even close. “Did you— did you see the video?”
His eyes shine with pride. “I did.”
“Well.” I clear my throat, looking away. “That was— that’s where I found my creative energy. And if you’ll have me, I’d like to spend more time up there with you.”
“I’d ask you to move in with me right now if it wasn’t too soon,” he says, and when I turn, catching his gaze with mine, I see that he’s completely serious.
“Is it too soon?” I ask, heart beating in my throat. Everything in me wants to be up at the cabin with him, rather than here in the city.
He looks eager, but clears his throat, tempering his excitement. “What if you come up for a week, and we decide after that?”
I can’t stop the smile that spreads over my face, and Rowan adds, “I’ll never get tired of you being there, Lola. So, it’s only about when you want to leave.”
“Well, I’ll never get tired of being there. So, it’s more about when you want space.”
He anchors a hand on the small of my back and draws me into him, dropping his lips to my ear and murmuring, “I thought last night made it pretty clear that the last thing I want is space.”
Images of us — me on my hands and knees, his hands grazing over my hips — flash into my mind, and a blush erupts on my cheeks.
“You should come with me,” I say, clearing my throat and staring up at him. “To the ceremony.”
Rowan smirks, then rubs his hand over his jaw, “I suppose I can. But I’ll probably have to shave, huh?”
Maisie gets home just as we’re leaving, and she gives in to my insistence that she comes along.
Rowan is buying a new suit to wear to the award ceremony. When he goes off to draw cash from an ATM, Maisie grabs me by the arm and whispers gleefully, “Okay, girl, you didn’t say he was that hot!”
“Pretty sure I did,” I say, and then I hush her, but the look on Rowan’s face says he heard what she said.
Together, we go to a gentleman’s clothing store downtown, and Rowan isn’t content with just getting himself a suit — Maisie and I both get anything we so much as glance at in the stores, and the result is that the three of us arrive at the ceremony looking scrubbed clean and dolled up.
“Holy shit, you look great!” Abbie says, meeting us in the lobby and squeezing my hands. When her eyes dart to Rowan standing behind me, they go wide, and she whispers, “You went after him?”
“Yeah.” I laugh, going in for a surprise hug. Abbie is wearing a simple black dress and smells like fresh linen. “Everyone was giving me all this great advice I couldn’t ignore.”
We head into the ceremony together, finding our table. The ballroom is filled with influencers from all around the country, all coming in after entering the Ecotra contest.
I called them days ago to let them know I wouldn’t be accepting the award. Long before Rowan showed up at my door, I knew this wasn’t right for me. That, at least for now, the Cascade Range was where my heart needed to be.
“Hello everyone, and thank you all so much for coming out,” Tamara says, taking the stage, looking as immaculate as every other time I’ve seen her.
She scans the room and catches my gaze for a moment, giving me the slightest nod.
“Each and every one of the videos entered into this contest was wonderful, highlighting the wonders of this world and showing the personalities of all you great content creators.
“But there were a few entries that stood out above the rest, and we’d like to recognize them all now.”
One by one, exceptional influencers are recognized and called to the stage.
One from New Orleans, who highlighted the disparity between the swamps and the city.
A girl from Nebraska, who explored the world from the perspective of a single ear of corn, giving thanks to the farmers and growers of the country.
A girl from Hawaii, who paired nightlife in Honolulu with the dying coral reefs, and a collective effort to save the many species living within them.
And my video is included, even though I turned down the sponsorship.
And finally, “Abbie Callahan!” Tamara calls, her voice ringing out. “For her video on aesthetics and nature — a romantic view of the outdoors and how we can all learn to appreciate our connections to life.”
Abbie blinks, surprised, and rises to her feet, her eyes shining as she walks through the room and joins me on the stage. I take her hand and squeeze, my heart beating quickly in my chest.
I’ve already turned down the offer, so I have no idea who they’re actually going to choose from those of us who won the preliminary award.
We take a quick photo with our little statuettes — carved from bamboo by an independent artist, then Tamara returns to the microphone, thanking sponsors and explaining, again, the prize for the winner.
After what feels like hours but is probably only minutes, Tamara opens a small envelope, pulling out a cream card.
“And the winner of the Ecotra Influencer Contest is… Abbie Callahan!”
The room erupts in cheers, and I turn to her, throwing my arms around her and bringing her in for a hug. Her body shakes under my touch, and when I let her go, I realize she’s laughing and crying at the same time.
“I can’t believe it,” she whispers, accepting hugs from the other finalists. “This is unbelievable.”
I could have taken the Ecotra trip. Maybe I even would have had a pretty good time or been able to find pockets of happiness between grueling travel and non-stop moving.
But this is all Abbie has ever wanted. And it makes far more sense for her to go and bring her energy to the opportunity than for me to keep it for myself when I know I’ll be happier in the mountains with Rowan.
Abbie steps up to the microphone to deliver her speech, and the rest of us take the stairs down the side of the stage.
When I hit even ground, a pair of strong arms wrap around me, pulling me in close.
“I’m so proud of you,” Rowan whispers into my hair.
And even though we’re in public, and even though I should probably be getting back to my seat, I tip my head up and capture his lips with mine.
It’s sweet and simple, and through it I feel his care for me.
Maybe this was love at first sight. Maybe it wasn’t.
It could be all me and him, the perfect alignment. Soul mates. It could be spending a week in the cabin with him, speed-running first dates and getting-to-know-you activities.
In the end, it doesn’t really matter whether or not it’s too fast or what other people might think.
All I know is now that I have him, I’m never going to let him go.