Epilogue
IVY
I walk through the graveyard looking for the location Sawyer told me my parents were buried. The sky is perfectly overcast, the rain ready to give at any moment.
I welcome it. I walk past peoples’ loved ones’ final resting spots until I come up to my mom’s. I take a seat on the ground in front of her tombstone, choosing to ignore my father’s, who is placed next to her.
“Hi, Momma. I should have come to see you before now, but I honestly didn’t know what to say. I’ve had a lot to work through. I’m back home. And I know that’s not what you wanted for me, but it’s what I’ve always wanted for myself. I found my way back to Sawyer. He waited for me, Mom. All he’s ever asked of me is to just keep breathing and for my heart to keep beating. I’m happy now. I’d like to think you’d be happy to see my life fulfilled, even if it’s different from what you wanted for me.”
I wipe my tears away as the rain starts to escape from the heavy clouds above. It cascades down my body in the comforting caress it always has.
“I forgive you, Mom. I understand that you did what you thought was best, to mother me the only way you knew. So, I forgive you. I don’t hurt anymore. I’m not scared anymore. Most of all? I’m not forced to hold it together anymore. I get to just be .”
I tip my head back to face the sky, close my eyes, and let the rain wash over me. I rub my palm over my belly and smile.
“I’m going to be a mom. Sawyer doesn’t know yet, but nothing is going to make him happier. We lost enough time, and we aren’t wasting anymore. I just. I wanted you to know. I love you, Momma. I hope you’re out there somewhere, exploring and finally free, because I am now. Finally free.”
I stand and dust off my pants before walking to my jeep. I’ve let everything go, it’s time to focus on the life ahead of me, with the only man who’s ever known and loved all of me.