Chapter 3
DOLLY
The farmers market of our hometown La Pradera has been mine and my sister-in-law, Rosie’s, thing for the past six months.
We look forward to it every week because we get out of the house to socialize, gossip, and promote our little start-up business, selling Rosie’s homemade salsa and herbs from her garden at Redford Ranch and my jams, jellies, honey butter, and baked goods.
This week, I brought freshly baked scones and sourdough chocolate chip cookies. Sun Butter Bakery is a blooming, albeit still tiny, success.
Rosie has been my best friend since we were kids. She loves being a mom to her twin girls, but she also enjoys getting out of the house and interacting with other adults for a few hours a week.
She and my oldest brother Holden had Bonnie and Birdie a year and a half ago. Duke and Rosie dated in high school, but they both moved on before she and Holden fell in love.
“My dear, these are simply incredible. Who’s the baker?”
Rosie turns to me, smiling at the elderly customer. “That would be Dolly. It’s her original recipe.”
The woman’s wrinkled face beams with approval. “You are quite the baker, young lady. I’ll take two dozen of these cookies.”
“Coming right up.” Rosie starts wrapping the product while I ring up the total on our laptop that we use as a register.
As soon as the woman pays and walks away, Rosie turns to me. “Okay, what’s with you? That was the third compliment on your cookies today, which are almost sold out, and you’ve barely cracked a smile.”
I sigh. “I’m just feeling blah. I’m thankful for the sale, of course. I just—” My voice falters when I see Keely Wright walking through the tents with a basket on her arm.
She’s dressed in a low-cut floral sundress, blond hair curled around her face. A smile cuts across her lips when she spots our tent. My stomach muscles tense.
“Girls! Great to see you. It’s been forever. How are the twins?” Keely looks at my best friend.
“They’re growing so fast. Almost walking, but not quite.”
Keely sighs. “I want twins someday. I hope they both get Sam’s eyes and my hair.”
I chew the inside of my lip and busy myself organizing our brown paper shopping bags to avoid eye contact with her. My skin overheats despite the breezy morning and our tent shielding us from the sun.
Rosie nods. “I didn’t know you two were back together.”
Keely waves a hand. “It’s not quite official yet.
He’s grieving his grandfather, as you know.
I’m giving him the space he needs to heal.
But he asked me to come over today, so we’ll be picking things up where we left off soon.
In fact, I stopped by here to bring him some things to snack on.
Can I get a jar of your salsa, extra hot?
And four scones with a jar of honey butter. ”
“Of course. I know Mr. Seymour’s death has been rough on him. Duke has been going over there every day to check in.”
Keely’s face tightens. “Yes, well, he’s bringing liquor and beer with him every single time, keeping Sam in a constant state of inebriation.”
Rosie shrugs. “Duke certainly has his own methods.” She packs up the last of the scones, placing them in a separate bag from the salsa.
I force my lips to curve into a smile. “Your total is forty-five dollars and thirty-one cents.”
Keely hands me her credit card with her manicured French tip stiletto nails. “Oh wow. Been digging in that garden?” She taps the acrylics on the plastic table. “I can’t imagine. I don’t feel put together without a manicure.”
I look down at my nails, realizing they do look a little grimy with dirt trapped under them. I usually keep them clean, but I had to dig through the garden for a few more jalapenos so Rosie could finish the salsa this morning. Once I’m done charging her card, I hand it back to her.
“Emailed receipt okay?”
She nods, picking up the bags. She tosses her long hair over her shoulder, and I note that not only is her hair smooth and shiny, but her makeup is flawless, and her lash extensions look so good that only women can tell they’re not real.
She’s taller than me by at least four inches, and it’s all in her legs, making her steps look elegant and graceful.
“Thanks, girls. You’re the best!” She saunters off with her model walk.
I shrink down to sit on the ice chest we hauled the salsa in.
“Oh, honey, I’m so sorry.” Rosie pulls me close, tucking my hair behind my ear. “I hate that you’re still hung up on him. We need to find you someone else, a new man to crush on.”
Tears well up in my eyes. “I just need to get over it. If they’re getting back together, he’s definitely not going to give me the time of day.”
I never told Rosie what happened at Sam’s house a few days ago with the coffee cake. We haven’t had any time alone without either Holden or Duke around until today. Now I’m too embarrassed to voice it.
Since she and Holden moved into their own house on the ranch a half mile away from the main one, we don’t get to see each other every day.
She’s busy with the twins, and I’ve been hard at work on my cookbook and baking for the market today.
I was going to tell her this morning, but after the run-in with Keely, I’ll just keep it to myself and wallow in self-pity.
“I don’t get why she always has to say rude shit to me. Why point out my nails?”
Rosie shakes her head. “I’ve always wondered that. She only does it to you, never me. She’s so nice to me.”
I grind my teeth together. “I don’t know what he sees in her.”
The vision of her blond hair shining in the sun filters through my mind.
If I’m being honest with myself, I know exactly what he sees in her.
He sees a gorgeous, polished model. She was the captain of the cheer team in high school, and they were the it couple their senior year.
I was a nerdy junior and so obsessed with Sam that I couldn’t even go to football games and watch them kiss after every win without crying about it from the bleachers.
Rosie rubs my back before walking over to greet our next customers. She’s the only one who’s always known about my crush on Sam. I have liked other guys from time to time in the last ten years.
I tried to move on with an older guy, Rosie’s uncle Cain.
It was a very brief fling that ended up with me getting sexually assaulted, Cain getting murdered, Holden going to prison, and a whole dramatic slew of events that I still blame myself for.
Rosie and Holden ended up falling in love because of it all, so at least it had a happy ending—for them.
Cain Dixon was the last man I attempted to date in an effort to get over Sam Seymour, and it nearly destroyed my entire life.
FIVE YEARS EARLIER
Cain squeezes my hand as we walk down toward the river. The sun is setting behind the trees. My belly is full of butterflies as I look up at him. He’s so handsome. Even though he’s twelve years older than me, I can see us making it work. I like older men.
Especially when they don’t treat me like I’m invisible.
With four scary older brothers, most guys treat me like I have a disease.
“It’s a nice night, ain’t it?” He wraps his arm around my waist.
The sudden close contact makes me stumble. I’ve never even fooled around with a guy, and with this being our first time to even be alone, I’m beyond nervous. I’ve always been a baking book nerd who doesn’t know how to flirt.
“Yeah, it’s beautiful out here. Why’d you want to come over tonight?” I’m hoping he’s going to ask me on a real date or at least for my number so we can text and get to know each other.
“After I saw how grown-up you’d gotten earlier today, I just needed to see you again. You’re the prettiest girl in this town—you know that?” He grins, winking at me.
His teeth are a little stained from tobacco, but that’s a very fixable problem. Other than that, he’s attractive, with broad shoulders and pretty blue eyes.
I blush under his praise. “That’s completely untrue, but thank you.”
He squeezes my side, his fingers brushing dangerously low toward my butt.
Any one of my brothers would kill me if they knew I was out here with Cain Dixon right now.
I’m usually a rule follower. I’ve never done anything like this, and the thrill of his attention is getting to my head and making me feel drunk.
The sound of water rushing over rocks reaches my ears as we approach the river at the low crossing. Redford Ranch has ample natural water resources, which makes it incredibly valuable and ideal for raising cattle.
“This is my favorite spot. In the summer, we come down here and swim, have picnics, and just hang out.”
“I bet you look so hot in a bikini.”
I giggle, feeling slightly uneasy when his hand drops lower, gently cupping my ass. I pull back from him. We make it down to the edge of the water, where a big, smooth rock sticks out of the side. It’s perfect for lying out to get sun or to sit and watch the river flow over the rocks.
“So, you’re not worried about what your brothers would say about you being all alone out here with me?”
The uneasiness in my gut grows. I shrug, trying to act casual. “I don’t think they’d be thrilled about it, but they don’t control me. I make my own decisions.”
I’ve been under lock and key my entire life. Holden, Cash, Duke, and Sterling make me feel like I’m suffocating sometimes. They want me to become an old maid, cooking and cleaning up after them until I finally keel over and die.
Cain stretches out a hand and pinches my chin. “Can you keep this our little secret?”
I swallow over the lump in my throat. “I mean, we’re just talking right now. It’s not that big of a deal.”
“You’re so gorgeous in this light. You know what’s more fun than talking?” His eyes glint as he leans toward me.
I pull back, turning my head to the side.
He kisses my cheek, releasing a low chuckle. “Ah, so you’re a tease, huh? That’s okay. It’s more fun.”
I look around at the growing darkness, fear spiking in my veins. “You know, Rosie was upset when I left. I might need to go check up on her. She was fighting with Duke.”
“The fact that you’re only eighteen is fucking wild. You look older.”
He leans forward, trying to kiss me again. I turn my head, stepping away to put distance between us.
“Yeah, I get that a lot.” I don’t, but I chuckle, telling myself this is fine. “I should probably get to Rosie now.” I fold my arms around myself to stop from shivering.
“Ah, I thought you wanted some alone time with me.” His face hardens.
“I did … I just thought we’d go on a real date or something.”
“You need a real man. You’ve probably never been touched by someone who knew what they were doing. I can show you things.”
My eyes widen when I see his fingers start to unbutton his jeans. He drags the zipper down, his face illuminated in the moonlight. My heart thunders inside my chest with an unsteady beat. I take another step back, debating if I should make a run for it.
“I’m still a virgin, so, no, I haven’t. I’ve never met someone I was ready to—”
He takes two quick steps forward, his hands jerking me by the waist of my jeans. “You’ll like it. I’ll make you feel good.”
A tornado of emotions is swirling inside me. I might pass out from the fear, adrenaline, and my heart desperately pumping blood to keep up.
Don’t panic, don’t panic, don’t panic!
I attempt to jerk away from him, but he’s so strong. When the paralyzing fear finally releases my voice to me, I let out a bloodcurdling scream. He shoves me to the ground before tugging his jeans down farther.
My resistance seems to fuel his resolve.
He jerks at the button of my jeans, ripping it off.
My vision starts to go black when he continues ripping my clothes off, going for my shirt next, the buttons scattering around as it splits open.
My limbs are numb. I struggle against him, my back getting scratched up with the rocks and sticks under me.
“Get off me!” I scream, desperately searching around for some kind of weapon to fight him off with. I’m reaching for a rock within my grasp when I make eye contact with a familiar set of dark eyes belonging to my older brother Holden.
His murderous gaze is latched on to Cain. My throat dries when I see the gun in his hand glinting in the moonlight. He raises it and aims for the head of my attacker.
This is all my fault.
“Get the fuck away from her if you want to live to see another day.”