Chapter Twenty-Nine Scarlett
Since the trip to Boston, I’ve been feeling a little lighter.
Being surrounded by different people, talking about my ideas and the hopes I have for the future didn’t fill me with dread like I expected it to.
I was allowed to be excited about the things I’ve achieved and what I’m setting out to do.
And I guess having Evan constantly cheer me on didn’t hurt either.
I knew when I got back to NU, I’d have to finally face the music and talk to my parents. I haven’t gone long without speaking to them since the summer, and it’s starting to eat away at me.
I needed the time away from them. I needed to figure things out on my own, forge my own path without their expectations or their rules or their games. I finally have something else to look forward to. Something to work toward.
By the time I’m actually driving to my parents’ house, I feel ready.
I mean, not completely, but I don’t think I’m ever going to be fully ready.
I’ve seen disappointment etched into their features so many times that I’m used to it.
There isn’t anything that they could say or do that could hurt me more than they already have.
My parents are talking over music in the kitchen when I walk in. I wait a couple seconds to collect myself before clearing my throat and my mom’s head shoots up in shock.
“Scarlett,” she says, and my dad’s eyes widen. “This is a surprise.”
“This is also going to be a quick visit,” I say, holding my chin high.
My parents exchange a look, and I take in a deep breath, feeling the weight of my next words roll off my shoulders as I exhale.
“What happened at Christmas was really shitty. I don’t know why you did what you did, and honestly, I don’t think I want to know.
You don’t trust me, you think I’m somebody you can’t have representing Voss.
And though I may never understand that, I think you’re making the right call. ”
My dad’s eyebrows shoot up his forehead. “You do?”
I nod. “Yes, and I know that because I don’t want to work for Voss anymore.
I want to work for myself. I want to make something of my own, something where my designs can shine without being told they’re not good enough.
” I take in another steadying breath. “I don’t expect you guys to be happy about it, but I’m not asking for your blessing either.
This is something I’m doing whether you like it or not. ”
My gaze flickers between each of my parents. There’s silence. Lots of it.
I’m so tired of feeling like a kid desperately trying to impress my parents, because no matter how hard I try, it’s not going to be enough. They’re going to keep holding my one mistake over my head forever, but I’m not going to let that happen.
I watch the both of them think, their mouths opening and closing with nothing coming out. Does this have to be so fucking awkward? I at least thought we’d argue some more before I eventually storm out, but this silence feels a lot worse.
And then, finally, my dad speaks. “We’re sorry.”
His words throw me off-balance and I grip the side of the countertop. It’s only then that I realize they were prepping lunch together, probably smiling and singing together before I walked in. “You’re sorry?” I echo, blinking at the two of them.
“Yes. We thought the list would be a good distraction for you. To stop you from asking to join the company. We all know you don’t need to do that,” he explains.
I scratch my eyebrow in confusion. “What do you mean I don’t need to? It’s been my dream to work for Voss since I knew what the word meant.”
My dad tries to speak, but my mom covers his hand, speaking for the both of them. “Your grades were suffering by how much you were trying to put into Voss. It’s like you became obsessed with it. We were worried about you.”
“Of course I did. I was obsessed with it because I desperately wanted to be a part of the business. Not because I’m a workaholic,” I say, letting out an incredulous laugh.
“Do you want to work for us or do you just want to impress us?” My mom’s words strike me somewhere in my chest and I forget how to breathe for a second.
She sighs, her shoulders dropping as her soft gaze holds mine.
“Look, Scarlett, we can admit that we’ve used you for your talents before.
We’ve kept you close so you could learn and so that we could also learn from you.
But you’re not the right fit for Voss, and you know that.
Your vision doesn’t align with ours anymore.
We want what’s best for you and for the company. ”
I scoff. “So you used me, and now you’re just going to stick to the same boring ideas forever?”
“Maybe, maybe not. But we are for now,” she says, sharing a look with my dad. “We just think you could take all this energy and this talent of yours to focus on something else, something for yourself. I’m sure you can make a difference somewhere else.”
I try to digest her words, and the longer I stare at the two of them, the more it makes sense.
They were never going to give me the job.
Not because I didn’t deserve it or because I wasn’t good enough, but because they know me.
They knew I’d get fed up trying to design the same thing over and over.
They knew I wouldn’t be able to stand attending events and pretending I’m enjoying doing something where my designs won’t shine.
My parents have always been stuck in their ways.
They’ve always had that traditional mindset when it comes to business, and it was silly of me to think I could be the one to change their minds.
And here they are, giving me an out because they know it’s what I really need.
I can’t help myself. I burst out laughing. It’s awkward and loud and it honestly hurts a little. My chest racks with the sound and I take a seat on one of the stools, steadying myself and my breathing.
“You two are really sneaky, you know that?” I wheeze.
My dad lets out a soft laugh. “We know.”
“You knew I’d figure out the list was a fake sooner or later.”
“We did.”
“Great show you put on with Alex, by the way.” They exchange a look, and whether or not Alex had a hand in this, I don’t care anymore. “And you also knew I’d be so mad at you that I’d pour everything into my designs and focus back on college.”
“Yes, we knew that too.”
I sigh, swiping a tear from my eye that I can’t tell if appeared from crying or laughing. “Why didn’t you just tell me that from the beginning? I would’ve given up on my dream to work for you a long time ago if I knew it was out of the question. You kept me waiting for . . . nothing.”
“I don’t think working at Voss would’ve helped you grow, Scarlett,” my mom says, and she reaches over the counter to squeeze my hand. “You would’ve spent your whole time trying to impress us instead of trying to impress yourself. We don’t want that for you.”
I swallow hard. “So you want me to work for someone else?”
They both nod. “We can’t be your only option, tesoro. You’re way bigger than that. You have so much to offer. It would be selfish to keep you to ourselves.”
This time a sad tear does leave my eye. “But Voss is my legacy.”
“No, it’s not,” my dad says, shaking his head firmly. “You are your own legacy. That’s in your hands.”
I’ve spent years trying to convince myself that my parents never understood me.
That they didn’t see the world the way I saw it.
That they didn’t understand the vision I had for Voss.
But they did. This whole time they’ve known me probably better than I know myself.
To be seen like this is all I’ve wanted from them.
A sly grin creeps up my face when I remember one thing. “Hypothetically, if I started a business and became mega famous, would that make me another competitor?”
My dad smiles. “Hypothetically, yes.”
“Okay, good to know.” The thrill of that shouldn’t excite me so much, but it does. I want to prove to myself how capable I am. How much smarter I have always been but was too afraid to fully unleash it.
“Well,” I say, standing up from my chair and holding out my palm. “May the best team win. I can’t say I’ll be available if you guys change your mind.”
My parents laugh, taking turns to shake my hand. My mom clasps her hands around mine, giving them another firm shake and a squeeze. “We are so proud of you, Scarlett. You’re going to do great things.”
For the first time in a while, I don’t doubt the words that come out of my mouth.
“I know I will.”