Chapter 95
Davian
Hold On
Always Forever
Cults
Barely had I spoken those words, the reporters pushed their way up the stairs to the lectern.
It was as if the number of journalists had suddenly doubled. As if they had been lurking somewhere, ready for the next headline about the elite.
Their questions flooded me, yet not a single one registered in my memory.
Unable to answer even a single question, my grip around the key charm tightened as I scanned the excited crowd for clear, gray crystal eyes.
I found them. Only they weren’t Quill’s eyes. They were Joseph’s.
I had expected every reaction. From disappointment, to frustration, to pure aggression. Yet it seemed as though I had thrown him off balance for a moment.
I should be happy, should feel triumphant not only because I had ruined his reputation, but also because I had finally managed to step out of the shadow of that path of life onto which he had forced me for over two decades.
But the feeling never came. Because there was something else in his gaze. Something that intensified in the next moment. A hint of triumph.
I hadn’t said or done anything that could make this man feel superior. And if it wasn’t because of me…
My wretched heart gave an uneasy leap. In the next moment, any sense of relief vanished.
Where the hell is Quill.
She was supposed to be here, damn it. I wanted to see her, wanted to know that she had gotten all the boxes to the car and that she was ready to get out of here with me.
I wanted nothing more than to leave this goddamn event with her and drive with her to that place where we had first met, to watch the fireworks from there in the distance.
I would ask her. Tonight. The little midnight-blue velvet box sat deep in my pants pocket beneath my keychain.
We had both made it, together, and come out stronger. Something that wouldn’t have been possible without her.
No bridge in this world would ever push us to the brink of despair again, as long as we had each other.
The reporters kept crowding closer to me, and I wanted to step down from the stairs, looked across the hall, scanning for my feather, but instead spotted police officers entering the foyer.
People turned toward the entrance, and most of the reporters were distracted for a moment as well.
The police officers were looking at Joseph.
Why were they looking at Joseph?
He followed my gaze, stared at them for a moment, then looked back at me.
My heart slipped further out of its place.
He turned toward the police officers, for whom the excitedly whispering crowd was now making room, and raised his hand in my direction.
The police officers looked at me, past me… up the stairs, just like the rest of the bewildered hall.
Quill.
With growing inner paralysis, I looked back at Joseph – just like Monica, Anthony, and Lara – as the police officers began to move.
The triumph in his gaze was now impossible to miss.
What had he done…
I stumbled backward toward the railing, unsure if I was interpreting the situation correctly, wanted to be wrong, but… no… that couldn’t be. He had been here the whole time…
Something inside me froze instantly.
The next second, I spun around, hesitated no longer, and sprinted up the stairs to the second floor.
No… There had to be a misunderstanding here.
What could he possibly have done?
What could Quill possibly have done?
The pounding in my chest rang warningly in my ears.
I had to find her. I had to get her out of here.
Whatever it was that this bastard had done, I would get her away from this tainted place once and for all, would take care of things for her so she wouldn’t have to deal with this anymore.
I would start a new life. Together with the woman fate had undeservedly sent my way, so that I could ensure she became the happiest soul on earth. At least as happy as was possible in a world like this.
I rushed down the hallway toward the second staircase, taking three steps at a time.
A dark foreboding came over me as to why the police might be here.
What if Joseph had found out that she was involved in Troy’s death? What if she had told him?
No… There was no reason to do that.
Something was terribly wrong here. And every second I wasn’t holding Quill in my arms, her hand in mine, was wasted lifetime spent not knowing how she was doing.
Where was that damn attic…
I looked around, spotted a hallway branch I hadn’t set foot in for the past twenty years, and just started running.
There was no way she could still be up there.
What if she was waiting for me in the car? What if she hadn’t been able to stand it here anymore?
Fuck, Davian, why did you even take so long with that damn speech?
As I turned the corner, I spotted a narrow, steep staircase leading up to a closed door.
I heard footsteps in the distance down the hallway.
No one was going to lay a goddamn hand on my future wife without me breaking their fingers.
With growing impatience, I stormed up the stairs and flung the door open.
The first thing that whirled toward me were white scraps of paper. Scraps of paper covering the entire floor.
But the scraps of paper, which in the first second caused a knot to tighten in my stomach because the handwriting on them was unmistakably Quill’s, vanished from my perception in the next.
Hold On
Chord Overstreet
Amidst the white chaos, my Feather lay on her back, her skin ashen, staring up at the ceiling.
Her dark blue dress was soaked with even darker stains. Around her outstretched arms spread a…
“No…”
I stumbled through the chaos, fell to my knees beside her, and stared from the slits at her wrists, from which thick, dark red fluid flowed slowly and steadily, up to her motionless face.
“Quill?”
My panic-stricken voice cracked pitifully. And it was as if my heartbeat were the most deafening sound I had ever heard.
“Feather…”
Immediately I leaned over her, grabbed her by the shoulders, shook her, while something inside my chest contracted so painfully that I was no longer able to take a breath.
“Feather, please…”
But no matter how hard I shook her, she didn’t look at me, staring up at the ceiling until her head lolled to the side.
She wasn’t moving.
Why wasn’t she moving?!
Again, I looked at her arms.
Blood. Why was she bleeding?!
“No…,” I whispered as my vision blurred. “Blue, please...”
I took her hand in mine, searching for her pulse with trembling fingers.
In vain.
“No, please… Please, Quill…”
Warm blood clung to my hands. Her blood.
“No…”
My voice was that of a stranger.
“No, no, no, no…”
A painful sob tore through my throat, and my eyes immediately filled with tears.
I grimaced in pain as such a violent wave of wrenching emotions built up in my chest that its weight threatened to crush my lungs.
This wasn’t really happening. This couldn’t be happening.
It was a nightmare. And I wanted to wake the hell up! Now!
With trembling hands, I shook her again.
“Hey! Come on, Feather! Come on!”
Nothing.
A nightmare. This was a nightmare. It had to be…
I leaned toward her, pressed my head against her chest, and listened.
Nothing…
I pulled back, gasped for air, and looked at her wrists.
I had to stop the bleeding…
Frantically, I grabbed one of her hands, clenched my fist around the open wound, but the blood spurted past my fingers, causing my heart to skip a beat as I stared in shock at my fingers, which were dripping with blood.
“Fuck...”
Too much blood. Way too much blood…
“Fuck!”
Stop the damn bleeding!
Somehow I managed to pull her other hand toward me, to press down on that wound too, but no matter how hard I pressed, the blood found its way out from under my grip.
I had to do something, damn it!
My gaze darted around the room, but all I saw was paper and blood.
My head started to spin.
What the hell was I supposed to do?! What was I supposed to do?!
My chest rose and fell erratically, and I couldn’t tell if I was breathing anymore. Yet I felt too much.
Bring her back…
Sobbing, I leaned over her, placed my hands – over which I was gradually losing all control – on her chest.
“Quill, please…”
I started chest compressions, but something deep inside me screamed at me that her bleeding hadn’t stopped yet.
I couldn’t process the information, began compressing at regular intervals, before leaning down to her lips and giving her my breath.
Fuck, I would give her all my breath if necessary. My goddamn worthless life. Because without her, it was nothing more than that.
Without her…
No…
“Come on, Blue!” I pleaded desperately. “Come on! Please!”
This couldn’t be happening… It wasn’t happening. Everything in me refused to believe it.
Still, I pulled back and placed my uncontrollably trembling hands on her motionless chest once more.
“Please, Quill,” I gasped before pressing my mouth to hers again and giving her all my breath. “Please, Feather, come back…”
I need you.
Here. Now. Alive.
I wanted her to open her eyes, to take a deep breath, to smile at me.
Merciless tears blurred my vision.
“Please, Feather. Please!”
I pressed down harder, more frantically.
The spinning in my head grew more and more violent until I could no longer form a clear thought.
It was as if all the knowledge I had learned twenty years ago in med school had been erased.
Helplessness took such a hold of me that the overwhelming feeling inside me reached its peak like a roller coaster.
A glance at her wrists, from which blood was still flowing, caused the final short circuit.
I no longer knew what I was doing, just kept pressing down, giving her my breath, but I collapsed halfway on top of her when an unexpectedly painful sob tore through my chest.
“Quill…,” I sobbed into her neck and pulled back with all my strength to continue. “Please stay with me.”
Let me take you home.
I wanted to place my hands on her chest, wanted to bring her back, wanted to take my girl home, but someone grabbed my arm roughly.
“No!” I shouted, trying to break free as the person tried to pull me away from Quill, and I escaped their grip.
I collapsed onto her, clung to her and pressed my head against her chest, searching for her heartbeat, which always reminded me how precious life was by her side.
I had to get my feather back.
Without her...
There was no without her.
Hands reached for my arms, but I clung tightly to her.
“Please, Quill. Please…” I didn’t know if I was sobbing the words, but my voice broke at some point. “Please…”
Soul Tied
Ashley Singh
I wanted to wake up, open my eyes, and see her lying next to me. In our bed. With the morning sun filtering through the canopy, its shadows dancing softly across her face.
I wanted to stare at her until she blinked her eyes open and smiled at me sleepily, as if I were worth that smile.
I wanted to lean toward her, gently kiss my way up the tip of her nose until her carefree laughter sent butterflies fluttering through my stomach, and I had to wrap my arms around her and pull her close so she couldn’t escape me.
I wanted to take her to the bridge, wanted to ask her…
I hadn’t asked her…
I wouldn’t be able to ask her anymore…
“No…,” I sobbed against her skin, pressing my lips against her neck. “Please. Anything. I’ll do anything. Just please… come back…”
The hands kept tugging at me more and more relentlessly, so that I dragged her with me and her head slammed against the ground again and again.
They were hurting her.
My hand moved behind her head, wanting to hold it, but just at that moment too many hands grabbed my arms.
My own body betrayed me and I lost the strength to hold on to her.
I was dragged back, and again her head hit the ground with a dull thud, causing something in my chest to clench.
“No!” I gasped, reaching out my hands toward her.
Two police officers knelt in front of her, two others dragged me backward through the blood-smeared scraps of paper.
I heard their voices somewhere in the distance.
They managed to get me into a corner, and as soon as they let go of me, I fell to all fours, wanting to crawl back to my feather, but was pulled back.
“Please… Let me go to her…”
They said something, but I didn’t understand them.
“Please…”
The pain in my chest was too much, wouldn’t stop.
I had to get back to her.
She needed me.
“Stay back!”
Why should I… Why weren’t they doing anything? Why were they staring at her? Why wasn’t anyone doing anything, damn it?!
I was too weak to fight against their grip.
They had to take her to the hospital.
Now.
“Help her… please… bring her back…”
But no one moved.
The men kept holding me back. The others knelt beside her. One pulled out a phone, while the other reached into the scraps next to Quill and picked up a piece of paper.
At that moment, someone else burst into the attic.
Anthony.
But I forgot about him immediately, trying to move forward again, until the man to my right yanked me back so violently that I slammed into the wall behind me and hit my head on a wooden beam.
Everything was spinning. More and more people were entering the attic.
And with every second that passed without anyone doing anything, it felt as though someone were tearing my heart apart, fiber by fiber, with a shard of brittle glass.
I screamed her name, begging the men to do something, but they were busy holding Tony back from Quill.
My head slumped against the wood behind me, and I let all control over my burning body slip away, while something inside me ripped so slowly that I wasn't sure I would survive the next few minutes.
My heart ached with every breath, contracting, ready to suffocate itself.
Tony's screams reached me.
He wanted to lunge at me, but the police officers pulled him back until he tried to get to Quill again, and they dragged him out of the attic.
My eyes were fixed only on Quill, yet I was unable to move toward her.
Open your eyes. Turn your head toward me, Feather.
After what felt like an eternity, more people entered the attic and placed a white sheet over Quill.
No. They couldn’t take her away…
She would come back. I knew it.
No one was holding me back anymore, so I crawled forward again, my limbs wobbly and my hands sticky, making it to her sheet.
Something hit the back of my head.
And suddenly, everything went black.
I held on tight,
and you promised to stay.
But when I turned for a moment,
you fluttered away.
– Leaking Batteries Diary