Chapter 22 Sawyer
TWENTY-TWO
Sawyer
I shifted the truck into park. “Last chance to fake a flat tire.”
Ellie gave me a sideways glance. “And have you miss out on the holiday you love so much? No way.”
I reached for her hand without thinking—not for the fake dating thing, but because I wanted to.
We walked up to the ranch house, and the front door swung open before we got to the porch.
Dotty appeared, wearing plaid pajamas and the expression of a woman who had been up since five, fueled entirely by Christmas spirit.
“There you are.” She launched a bag at my head. “Get your ass inside and change. Pajamas. Now.”
“I love the festive hostile energy,” I said, catching the bag walking inside.
Gracie came flying down the hallway like a caffeinated elf on a sugar high. “Uncle Sawyer!”
I barely got my arms out in time to catch her. “Hey, Trouble!”
“I missed you!”
“Missed you more, G.”
Behind her, Noah and Dorian appeared, both looking cozy and calm. Ellie gave them a small wave, and they nodded back. I could already feel Colt mentally cataloguing every single interaction we had, as if he was storing data for later.
Which, fair.
Trent yelled something from the kitchen that ended in, “No one touch the bacon!”
Dotty just rolled her eyes.
“Merry Christmas,” Ellie said softly beside me.
“Only the merriest,” I muttered, nodding upstairs.
“Your room is good for you two to change in, yeah?” Dotty asked.
“Um, yeah. Sure.” She gave me a cheeky, knowing smile and walked off.
We trudged up the same old, creaky stairs I knew by heart, every squeak and weak spot memorized.
Teenage me had been a menace. My old bedroom still had the same posters from my high school football days and the same bed that was technically too small for me, even back then.
Ellie walked in behind me and looked around as if she was seeing inside my brain.
“This is where the legend began, huh?”
“Yep.” I dropped the pajama bag on the bed. “Where I first mastered eating six Pop-Tarts in a row and never once did laundry.”
She stepped closer, grabbing the bag of pajamas. “I still can’t believe I let you talk me into this.”
I smirked. “I’m very persuasive.”
“Um, is there a bathroom I can use?”
I hesitated, my voice low. “Yeah, but I’ve got a feeling this is a test.”
“A test?” Her eyebrow lifted.
“Colt’s figured us out, and I think Dotty’s got her suspicions about us not actually being a real couple. Forcing us to change in here? It’s definitely a test.”
She laughed softly. “Alright then…turn around.”
I lifted an eyebrow. “What if I don’t want to?”
“Sawyer,” she said, stern but playful.
I let out a dramatic sigh and obeyed, facing the wall. I smiled when I noticed the mirror beside me, and since Ellie didn't say no peeking, I selfishly looked. She bent down to grab her PJs and slid her jeans down with agonizing slowness.
And fuck—her legs were endless, smooth curves that made my fingers physically ache to trace them. The perfect little curve of her ass was practically begging for my hands, and I had to grip the dresser edge to keep from reaching out.
I forced myself to look away, but the damage was done. The image was burned into my retinas for years to come.
“Are you peeking?” her voice teased from behind me.
“No.”
She spun around, catching my reflection in the mirror. “Liar.” Her lips curved in a smile that was pure trouble.
My heart hammered. “Maybe.”
“Well, then you might as well watch.”
I turned around as she peeled off her shirt, her eyes locked on mine the entire time. Her bra was pretty and pink, and I nearly groaned. My pulse went haywire. How could something so simple make me want to lose every shred of control I had left?
She bit her bottom lip. “Like what you see?”
“You know I do.”
Once she was dressed, she had the gall to look innocent, but her chest was rising and falling rapidly still. “Your turn.”
“Enjoy the show.” I shrugged off my sweater with one hand.
“Not looking,” she said, turning away.
“You should.” I let my sweater hit the floor and reached for the hem of my shirt, pulling it off.
She turned back around and eyed me up and down.
I watched as her eyes tracked every inch of exposed skin as I changed into the pajama pants. The air felt tighter in the room, like we’d sucked all the oxygen out of it.
“You good?” I asked.
“I’m fine,” she whispered, but her voice cracked. “Why wouldn't I be?”
“No reason,” I murmured, moving closer as I tugged the pajama top over my head. “Just checking.”
We stood there, fully dressed, pretending not to look at each other. Except we totally were. Every shift, every breath, was an excuse to steal a glance.
“We should…” she said.
I took another step closer. “Should what?”
Her eyes flicked up, meeting mine with a wild, desperate edge I hadn't seen before.
“Go back down,” she finished weakly.
“Should we?” I tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, and my fingertips barely grazed her skin, but she shivered anyway.
“Yeah,” she breathed, but she didn't move.
Neither did I.
“Before I do something stupid,” I murmured, my thumb tracing her jawline.
Her gaze dropped to my mouth then flicked back up. “Like what?”
“You really want to know?”
She nodded, barely a movement.
I leaned in until my lips almost brushed her ear. “Like kiss you until you forget your own name.”
Her breath hitched. “That would be stupid?”
“The stupidest thing I could do.”
“Uncle Sawyer!” Gracie’s war cry rang through the house.
I stepped back and dragged a hair through my hand. Ellie sighed and, without another word, we walked back downstairs.
Gracie bolted toward the front door, already decked out in a puffy green coat and snow boots that lit up. “You’re on my team!” she said to me, handing me a green armband.
“Go team green!” I shouted.
“Wait, what are we doing?” Ellie asked, trailing behind me.
“Snowball fight,” Dotty said, tossing her a thick red coat with tiny reindeer antlers sewn onto the hood. “You’re team red with me, Colt, and Trent.”
Ellie stared at the coat and slowly looked up. “Why does it have…ears?”
“Because we’re a festive family,” Dotty said flatly. “Now, put it on.”
“I get both kids and the detective?” I grinned as I zipped up my own coat. “Hell yeah.”
Lilah arched a brow. “You do realize your brother is a detective too, right?”
“Yeah.” I shrugged. “But you’re more badass.”
Lilah smirked.
“My mom’s badass!” Caleb echoed proudly.
“Oopsie,” I muttered, shooting Lilah a look.
She narrowed her eyes. “You’re lucky you’re on my team, or I’d make you eat snow.”
“What about you guys?” I asked, nodding toward Dorian and Noah—who were both lounging near the fireplace like the cozy, warm-blooded betrayers they were.
“Papa’s making pancakes,” Gracie said with a serious nod. “And Daddy’s still healing. Noah says she wants to cuddle him on the fireplace.”
“By the fireplace, G,” Dotty said. “If they were on the fireplace, we might have a bigger problem.”
“Aw, the cute little couple,” Trent teased, slinging an arm around Dotty’s shoulder.
“They want to cuddle by the fireplace,” Gracie repeated, proud of herself.
“Good job, G,” Noah called from the couch. “Have fun!”
“Be careful,” Dorian added softly, his gaze flicking to Gracie as we headed out.
Dotty passed out colored armbands like we were heading into a gladiator arena. “Okay,” she said as we trudged into the snowy yard. “Team green, you’re west near the trees. Team red, east by the shed. We count down, and then all bets are off. No crying, no timeouts, and no mercy.”
Ellie glanced around like she’d been dropped into a different dimension. “Do I get a say in any of this?”
“Nope,” Colt said, clapping her on the back. “Welcome to hell.”
“I thought it was Christmas.”
“Same thing,” Colt muttered darkly, tugging on his gloves. He leaned closer and gave her a once-over. “How are you at sports?”
Ellie looked mildly horrified. “Um…bad?”
“She can dance around a stage for hours without losing her breath,” I said. “She’s got stamina for days.”
Colt grunted. “We’ll take it. Let’s destroy them.”
Dotty’s countdown started. “Three.”
I crouched behind a bush and grabbed a handful of snow, already forming the perfect compact sphere.
“Two.”
Ellie still looked dazed, her antlers flopping slightly in the wind.
“One.”
“War!” Gracie screamed at full volume.
All hell broke loose.
I got nailed in the ribs within the first ten seconds. Ellie ducked behind a tree and popped out like an assassin, pelting me with precision. I doubled over, laughing as snow exploded against my chest.
Gracie tagged Colt in the shin and threw her arms up. “I did it!”
Colt growled and dramatically limped in circles. I spotted Trent mid-sprint and launched a snowball straight at his face. It splattered across his beard.
“Hey! No face shots!”
“That wasn’t in the rules!” I shouted, already diving behind a tree.
Ellie emerged from the trees and hit me again right in the chest. Again.
“You trying to impress me?” I asked.
She shrugged, wearing a cheeky grin. “Is it working?”
Always yes.
My dad appeared, wearing slippers and his Christmas pajamas, silently cradling a snowball as if it were a sacred offering. He handed it off to Ellie. She didn’t say a word, just turned.
“Thanks, David!” she chirped.
And she nailed me in the sternum with the kind of force that made me question my entire athletic career.
“You traitor!” I gasped, staggering backward.
“Oh, you better run,” I said to Ellie before running after her.
She took off for the trees, boots crunching through the snow. That wild laugh of hers spilled from in front of me. I took off after her, cold air burning my chest as we dodged trees. She was fast but not fast enough.
I caught her at the edge of the trees and grabbed her around the waist. We went down together, crashing into the snow. I ended up on top of her, and we laughed, cackling like idiots. The laughter slowly died into breathless pants before a stretch of silence passed.
Her chest rose and fell beneath mine. Those cheeks flushed red, hair tangled and powdered in snow, lips parted slightly. Our eyes locked—and something unspoken pulled taut between us.
I could feel her heartbeat under my hands.
Or maybe it was mine. Hell if I knew. Her gaze dipped to my mouth then back to my eyes, and I swore the temperature dropped and spiked all at once.
Her hips bucked under me, and my body reacted before my brain could catch up.
A jolt of lust, of fucking need for this woman, slammed through me.
I barely bit back a groan as she bucked her hips. “Fuck,” I muttered.
“I think there’s a rock under my ass,” she said, breathless. “Sorry.”
“Are you?”
Her smile was nothing short of wicked. Then, she did it again. “Maybe I like having something hard pressed against me.”
“Ellie baby.” Her name slipped out, half warning, half promise. One more shift beneath me, and I’d forget it was Christmas morning. I’d toss her over my shoulder, drag her back to my place, and pin her down for real.
“Sorry, Sawyer love,” she murmured, eyes sparkling.
Her gloved hand hovered near my face. I wanted her touch on my jaw, my cheek, maybe my mouth. I didn’t care. The distance was setting me on fire, and I needed her hands on me.
The world shrank to that fragile inch between us. Every muscle tensed, aching for her to touch. If she leaned in, I knew I’d break.
And then—thwack.
A fistful of snow slammed into my temple, thrown by her other hand.
Ellie busted out laughing, rolling out from under me.
“You play dirty, Ellie,” I said, shaking the snow from my face.
Her grin? Pure sin. “So do you.”
“Get her, Uncle Sawyer,” Gracie shouted from behind a tree.
“I got him,” Caleb hollered, throwing another one that exploded next to my hip.
“Nice shot, buddy,” Lilah shouted across the yard.
“Hey,” I yelled. “We’re on the same team!”
Caleb grinned. “Oopsie.”
I groaned, hauled myself to my feet, and held out a hand. “C’mon, you traitor.”
Ellie took it, and I brushed snow off her shoulders, her back, her hips—maybe a little more than necessary.
She looked up at me. “Pretty sure your team is losing.”
I leaned in and whispered in her ear, “Nah. I got exactly what I wanted.”
The rest of the morning passed in a blur.
There was wrapping paper everywhere. Gracie had screamed over some glittery pink karaoke machine Dotty and Trent apparently thought she needed, and Caleb parked himself next to his mom and later curled in Colt’s lap.
Noah and Dorian were arguing over which pancake toppings were superior, and my dad kept hollering like a man who’d won the lottery with every gift he got—even a three-pack of thermal socks that, according to him, might as well have been gold.
It was…perfect.
I'd always loved the holidays. My mom had made them feel like magic—she was the kind of woman who started playing Christmas music in October and cried during every holiday movie.
She loved hard, big, and loud. One minute, she was wrapping gifts in the living room, making pancakes on the weekends, always coming to every one of my football games.
The next, she was gone. No warning, just an ordinary day that broke our world wide open.
When she passed, that magic cracked, but somehow, my dad held us together. With trembling hands and tired eyes, he found a way to keep the traditions alive, and it showed on days like today. Christmas was a piece of her, and he knew we needed that.
That time in my life marked a turning point. I became the comic relief, the one who made people laugh, who kept it light, who deflected before the silence got too heavy. It started as survival, and then it stuck. For a long time, I thought that was all I was—the funny guy, the human distraction.
But sitting here now, coffee warming my hands and Ellie curled against me on the couch, I realized I wanted to be more than that.
This morning wasn't perfect because I loved my family, or even because Ellie fit in so seamlessly.
It was perfect because it reminded me of what Christmas always meant to me and what I wanted it to mean again.
I’d watched my siblings fall headfirst into love. Real love. You could feel it just by being in the same room. It was the same love my parents had before my mom passed.
And fuck, I wanted it too.
I wanted the woman who made me smile so hard, my cheeks hurt, who smelled like something better than freshly baked cookies and had shown up in my life and made me want things I never thought I'd deserve.
I didn't know if this whole fake dating thing had made a dent in her the way it already had with me, didn't know if she'd ever want something real with me.
But I think she made me want it.