Chapter 15
Tucker
Ilike having Ruth and Birdie here more than I probably should.
But it’s just because I like knowing they’re okay. That after what happened yesterday morning, I don’t have to worry about whether or not they’re safe. Because anyone who wants to get at them would have to make it past security, past my employees, and past me.
At this specific moment, they would also have to make it past Brooke and Maren. The duo showed up shortly after I came out onto the work floor, and they’ve been in my office with Ruth for almost an hour, talking about God knows what.
I know a big part of what I hoped to accomplish by bringing her here today was so she could meet some of my family before dinner tomorrow. But as the minutes tick by, I get more and more worried about what information is being shared.
Specifically, what’s being said about me.
I know Ruth is well aware of my reputation. I still don’t like the thought of her being reminded just how friendly I’ve been over the years.
I’m not ashamed of it. I was always honest and straightforward with any woman who wanted to share my bed. I haven’t done anything wrong. I just maybe wouldn’t mind if Ruth didn’t know I did so much of it.
When I finally get to a stopping point, I go straight for my office, slightly concerned about what I’m about to find.
I pause at the door, warring with myself over how to proceed before deciding to knock, giving the women inside a chance to shut their mouths if I’m the current topic of conversation.
I still barely wait a second before going in.
Also just in case I’m the topic of conversation.
But as I scan the room, no one is acting suspicious. At all. Maren is on the couch with Birdie, playing with one of the toys Ruth packed to keep her entertained. Brooke and Ruth have found the coffee maker and are sipping cups of steaming liquid while talking about…
Pop-Tarts?
Ruth stops mid-sentence, sounding a whole lot like she's about to say her favorite Pop-Tart is chocolate chip, when her eyes snap to where I stand.
I search Ruth’s face for any sign of discomfort, but there's none. If anything, she looks completely at ease. Not surprising when I think about it. Brooke and Maren are fucking great. The two women are probably going to take her under their wing and help her navigate meeting the rest of the family.
I'm going to have to order each of them flowers. Both for helping Ruth and for not lamenting my life choices.
"Hey, loverboy." Brooke flashes me a grin that seems to carry a little more weight than I'm willing to look into.
And now I feel awkward about barging in the way I did.
“I just came to see if you need anything."
Ruth beams at me in a way that makes my chest tight. "Brooke helped me get some caffeine, so for now I think we're good."
"Yeah. Okay." I should have shown her where the coffee maker was.
There's probably a million more things I should show or tell her, but this is uncharted territory for me.
I've never been more than a one-night stand.
Never had to offer a woman anything besides a few orgasms and maybe a snack for the road.
And Ruth doesn't seem interested in receiving one of those options. Unfortunately.
"Cmeer." Birdie's little voice pierces the room as one chubby hand lifts in the air, opening and closing as she beckons me over. "Look."
I crouch next to where she sits on the couch with Maren, looking over the toy they've been playing with. "You like that one?"
Birdie bobs her head while signing yes at the same time.
Ruth is brilliant to have taught her daughter extra ways to communicate. I'm doing my best to catch up with them, and have managed to pick up a few of her more frequently used motions. But there’s one in particular I’ve become very familiar with.
That’s the sign I use now, curling my hand and running the tips of my fingers down the center of my chest. “Are you hungry? Would you like a snack?”
Birdie smiles so hard her whole face scrunches up as she enthusiastically nods her head and signs yes.
“She says that, but she’s turned her cute little nose up at everything I packed her.” Ruth digs around the diaper bag I carried in this morning. “Do you want some Cheerios?”
“No.” It’s one of the words the toddler says perfectly.
Not shocking.
Ruth lifts her brows at me. “See?”
I straighten. “Luckily, I happen to know where we can find a whole room full of snacks to choose from.” I look over the three women scattered around my office before stopping on Ruth. “I can take her to the break room to get something.”
As the words come out of my mouth, an unfortunate realization hits me.
Ruth and I covered how we would interact with each other today, but we haven’t discussed what she is and isn’t comfortable with where Birdie is concerned.
And while I recognize it’s important that everyone believes she trusts me with her daughter, I would never push her to pretend something like that.
We can do plenty of other things to convince my family we are an actual couple.
I hold Ruth’s eyes, hoping she hears what I can’t say. “Would you like to come?”
Ruth barely hesitates. No one else would recognize the beat of silence for what it is, but I can almost see what she’s thinking move across her face.
It’s similar to what just went through my head, and it involves whether or not she trusts me.
And what Brooke will think if she doesn’t allow me to take Birdie on my own.
I’m not gonna leave her hanging. I’m not gonna let her be stressed over this. Not when she has so much to be worried about as it is. So I hold my hand out. “Come on. You could probably use a snack too.”
Ruth hesitates another second, but then a smile that appears both surprised and a little relieved lifts her lips. “I’m okay. Just bring something back for me.”
Something weird hits me in my already tight chest. Warm and solid as it spreads behind my ribs and ripples down my arms. I know Titus and Mariah trust me with their twins, but my brother has known me forever. He knows I’m responsible. He knows I would protect those kids' lives with my own.
Ruth hasn’t known me forever. Having her trust hits me hard. Satisfies me in a way nothing has lately.
I slowly straighten, the little girl I’m already attached to at my feet when I say, “What do you think, Little Bird? You want to go with me to get a snack?”
“Snack.” She yells the single word she can say from that sentence, chubby little fingers reaching for me as they open and close with excitement.
I quickly glance at Ruth, hoping no one notices the permission I seek. Her soft smile from earlier holds and she gives me the barest of nods.
Without hesitation—to reduce any chance Maren and Brooke start getting suspicious—I scoop the toddler up, resting her on one hip.
Technically, I’ve held Birdie before, but that was when Ruth was right there with us, ready to momma bear me if I made any wrong moves.
And knowing I’ve shown Ruth I can be trusted unsupervised with the person most important to her has my chest puffing as Birdie and I navigate the halls of McKinley Security Systems.
I take her to the largest of the break rooms because it has the most snack options, and we spend almost twenty minutes going through everything there is to choose from.
At one point, she’s collected so much I have to go in search of a bag and end up dutifully following behind the curly headed little girl as she peruses everything from fruit-filled pastries to ramen noodle bowls.
I’m pretty sure she doesn’t even know what half the things she’s adding are and is throwing in items simply because they seem colorful and interesting, but I don’t give a shit.
Even if she opens every one of them and just dumps the contents onto my office floor, it will give her something to do.
I’ll give my cleaning crew a little bonus, and everyone will be happy.
We’re on the last cabinet when Walker strides in, his steel-toed boots stopping with a heavy thump when he sees me crouched next to Birdie.
“Where in the hell did you find a baby?”
“She’s not a baby, she’s a toddler.” I gesture at Birdie with one hand as she literally toddles from the cabinet to her bag of goodies.
“And this is Birdie.” I give the little girl a smile when she recognizes her name and looks at me.
“She’s my girlfriend’s daughter.” The words flow easily out of my mouth.
Likely because I’ve been repeating them in my brain over and over since I’ve never said anything like them in my life.
They’ve never applied to me before and they will never apply to me again. They don’t technically apply to me now, but no one’s going to know that.
“Bullshit.”
And maybe Walker knows that.
My cousin crosses both arms over his chest, shaking his head. “No fucking way do you have a girlfriend.”
I know I shouldn’t be offended. I’ve gone to great lengths for his words to be true. But it rankles a little bit this morning.
“I don’t know if you’ve heard, but lots of women have wanted to be my girlfriend.”
He snorts, a sharp chuckle following it. “Oh, I’ve heard. Everyone has heard.” He stabs an accusing finger at me. “You’re the one who doesn’t want them.”
“I changed my mind.”
Technically, it’s the truth. Makes it easier to say. Because I did change my mind. I do want a girlfriend.
Just not a real one.
Walker is shaking his head before I even finish making the claim. “No you did not.” His expression softens the tiniest bit, along with his tone. “I know why you don’t want one, and I also know that hasn’t changed.”
There’s a moment of silence between us. One that carries years’ worth of unsaid words. Years of sharing a similar fate.
I know Walker understands why I am the way I am. I don’t know if anyone else truly gets it—or even saw the pain I struggled to navigate as a kid—and that’s okay. I know my pain is nothing compared to Titus’s.
Or my mother’s.
It’s different. Complicated. It’s made me see the world differently. Prioritize relationships in a way many people don’t get.
But I think Walker does. He understands how risky connection can be. The space it occupies in your life and the hole it leaves when it’s gone.
That’s why I decided to never give it space. That I will never face the kind of emptiness that nearly broke Titus.
Probably did break Walker.
And while I might not be able to convince my cousin completely, I’ve got to at least make him wonder. Because my mother will notice if Walker thinks I’m lying.
So I shrug, blowing it off like it’s no big deal. “What can I say? They're right when they say meeting the right person will change you.”
Birdie smacks me in the side of the face, pulling my attention from where my cousin stands. Her eyes are big and fixed on my face as she wildly gestures down the middle of her chest.
“You are an impatient little thing, aren’t you?” I’m smiling as I say it, because I suffer from a serious case of impatience myself. “I should probably let your momma pick what you snack on.”
I’m starting to understand how Ruth is raising Birdie, but I’m nowhere near fully grasping what she would or wouldn’t do. And I really appreciate her being here, so the last thing I want is to step on her toes.
I wrap one arm around Birdie, scooping her up as I stand, holding her on one side and her bag of goodies on the other as I meet my cousin's skeptical gaze. “Would you like to meet Ruth?”
“I’ll wait.” He smirks, thinking he’s got me. “I’m assuming she’s coming to family dinner tomorrow night?”
“You assume correctly.”
I grin when he’s immediately shocked. I understand this is nothing he ever expected to see, but Walker’s going to have to come around.
Because I’m not going to have Deidre Bradshaw on my ass next.
Hell, if Walker knows what’s good for him, he’ll start plotting his own scheme to get her to set her sights on Trevor.
And he’s gonna have to start soon, because I am in it to win it.
A fact I think he grasps a little more when I pause as I walk past, laying down my cards. “It would be weird not to bring Ruth, especially since she’s living with me now.”
Walker stands in stunned silence as Birdie and I stride out of the break room.
My grin holds as I walk through the halls, greeting employees who give me the same sort of shocked look my brother offered when they see me carrying Birdie around.
They’re going to have to get used to it too. At least for the next few weeks.
I anticipate Ruth and Birdie coming here more often than not as this all plays out. I know at some point she’ll likely be more comfortable with the prospect of my mother showing up unannounced, but I like having them here.
Especially since I still don’t know what’s lurking out there. When they’re here, I won’t have to worry about someone figuring out their location and showing up to cause problems. I won’t have to—
I stop as I round one corner, coming face-to-face with something I might actually have to worry about.
Brooke, Maren, and Ruth stand just outside the door leading to my wing of the building. And they’re not alone. Standing a little too fucking close, and looking a little too fucking hard at Ruth, are the three men from Alaskan Security.
And for some goddamn reason, Ruth is laughing at something one of them just said.