Chapter 58
FIFTY-EIGHT
Bri
Hieroglyphs light up in every color and shape. I scan the panel, looking for anything to indicate takeoff. Where’s the bright red arrow pointing up? Or at least something that goes “boom”?
Tai is down there. Unarmed.
Movement catches my attention. It’s Tai making a run for the freighter, for me. Blaster fire follows him until he dives behind a tent for cover.
Only it’s not the Tai I know. This one is enormous, in size and presence. Power pulses off him in waves, invisible but undeniable. The air around him ripples like the aftershock of a nuclear blast. I feel it from here, a thrum in my diaphragm.
Raw. Magnetic. Barely contained.
“You’ve got to be kidding me.” I shake my head at the realization.
The Tilak who believed he wasn’t worthy of a battleform or a mate now has both. All I feel is pride. He's mine, and apparently every cell in his gigantic body already knew it before he did.
“Come on!” I run my hands along the panel. “Where’s the fucking universal language when you need it?”
“Switching to universal language,” a robotic voice chirps.
A dark, cold laugh from behind freezes me in place. My hands move instinctively toward the blaster.
“Turn around, slowly,” a garbled voice orders.
“Okay. Whatever you say.”
Time slows down, everything except my pulse racing in my ears. I pick up the blaster. No hesitation. Just the cold weight of it in my hand. I turn and face my own reflection in the shiny helmet. I fire straight into his chest. Smoke drifts up from his chest as he sinks to the floor.
I step closer and fire another round into their chest. “And that’s for underestimating me.” I nudge the smoking body with my foot. The lack of response tells me all I need to know. I killed someone. I killed a Yuhlari poacher.
“Tai is going to be so jealous that I got to blast my way out.” I spin around and look for him through the smoke and rubble. I don’t have time to mourn the space trash I just took out. I need to get to Tai.
Back at the panel, I still don’t know what to do. Out of pure desperation, I slam my hand down on the panel. The freighter surges to life and slowly rolls forward.
“Enough of this bullshit.” I hit the phaser glyph on the control deck and a lever with a hand grip extends forward out of nowhere.
I grab it tightly in my sweaty hand and point it at the ground in front of the poachers.
The canon fires off, and a huge explosion of sand and smoke obscures my vision.
A handful of Yuhlari bodies go flying from the blast. Still no sign of Tai.
I wait for the smoke to clear to take another shot.
When I see the coast is clear and no one is left moving, I run for the cargo bay.
Tai, where are you?
He should already be onboard. Something’s not right. The feeling is so visceral it costs me my breath.
Then I'm moving. Down the stairs, through the cargo bay, and my feet hit the ground hard. Through the smoke. Through the wreckage. Through whatever gets in my way. There isn’t a single h’axom in sight. Relief hits fast. Daisy made it, but I don't stop moving.
I find Tai against a broken post, half collapsed, his bionic arm gone like it was never there.
“You can’t follow the simplest instructions, can you?” he chokes out.
“And you’re fucking lucky I can’t.” I check his pulse at his throat. It’s weak.
“Come on, let’s get the fuck off this planet,” he says and tries to lift himself off the ground. He falls back, unable to get up.
Tai groans when I pull him up. I sling his huge arm over my shoulders. It’s almost funny how big he is, leaning down on me for support. But no one is laughing, not at least until we are light-years away from here.
“What is it with your arm and this place?” I ask, trying to get him to focus on me rather than the pain. I can tell he’s in shock. I’ll get him talking and get him to a medbay.
“I wish I knew.”
“We’re almost home. Hold on a bit longer,” I say breathlessly. He’s heavy, and the distance to the freighter feels like it’s getting farther away.
We stumble together to the ship, him weighing heavily on my shoulders. With a grimace, he climbs the ramp and collapses in the cargo bay. I slam the button down, raising the ramp and closing us in.
On the floor, Tai's head tips sideways and his eyes roll back into his head until only the whites are visible. I roughly grab his face and pull it toward me.
“Tai, look at me. Stay with me. I’m going to get you home.”
“Bri, I need to tell you something. You need to know before we leave,” he says struggling for breath.
“No, focus on breathing. You can tell me later.”
“No, you need to know.”
“No, Tai. It’s okay. Whatever it is, it’s okay.”
His head rolls forward, and his eyes catch mine. “You’re so pretty,” he says, sounding intoxicated. His only remaining hand cups my face.
“Yes, I’m a goddamn beauty queen. Just hold on, okay?”
Tai laughs. “Everybody loves you.” His face scrunches in pain. “But nobody loves you like I do. I would never leave you.”
“I know you won’t ever leave. I know you won’t.
I’m worried I will.” Tears stream down my face and drop on his torn shirt.
My heart is being ripped out of my chest. I touch the side of his face softly.
The fact that I love him doesn’t change that I’m too much like my father. Too restless, too selfish.
“Look at you over there, pretending you can live without me,” he says and hisses sharply between his teeth. He grabs at his empty shoulder, writhing in pain.
“It’s nice to see you didn’t lose your sense of humor along with your arm.” I laugh through sobs, wiping tears away with my dirty hand.
“Never,” he says with a painful laugh. “You’re a lot tougher than I thought you would be.”
“I am my father’s daughter,” I say absentmindedly as I check his wounds. These are words I’ve thought often but rarely said out loud.
“No, you’re wrong. You’re like your brothers. Loyal, hardworking, selfless.” He struggles to get each word out, breathing hard between each one.
“I love you.” With those final words, he passes out, his body going limp.
“FUCK!” I scream and run to the flight deck.
I snap myself into the harness, not bothering to tighten the straps.
“Assistance Support System!” I shout into the air.
Nothing.
“Activate Support System!” I try again. What were the fucking words?!
Nothing.
“Advanced Systems…” Oh fuck this.
“ASS, turn on the goddamn engines!”
The freighter chimes, and the control panel lights up green. Halle-fucking-lujah. Green means go.
“Automated Support System, Activated.”
The engines roar to life, and I’m thrown back into my seat.
Nausea rolls through my stomach. I do my best to swallow it back down.
The freighter lifts off the ground with a swoop, moving faster than I was prepared for.
I’m used to the slow movements of a passenger ship—not a freighter that cares nothing for the comfort of the cargo.
We break through the thin atmosphere, and the sight of bright stars against a black sky has never looked so good.
“ASS, link to Hycea 34, Aro pt’Burosa,” I instruct the AI system.
“It is preferential to direct the voice activation using the official terminology.”
Not in the mood to be lectured by a fucking machine, I hit the mute on the control panel and search for the comms glyph. The link goes through and a small Aro the size of my forearm takes shape under the holoprojector.
“How do I get this thing home?” I ask Aro, skipping all pleasantries.
“You have no idea how happy I am to see you,” he says with a smile.
“Aro don’t fuck around. I need to get back—now. Tai’s hurt.”
The only thing that matters is getting Tai home.
I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. He was restless at the start, constantly tossing and turning, sweating, and mumbling.
The last three or four hours he’s been completely still.
No movement. I watch his chest slowly rise and fall with his breath, afraid to even blink.
The only relief comes from obsessively checking his pulse.
We survived Sabaak together. That’s how this story ends.
It has to. I fell in love with him while he healed from his past. I didn’t know it was possible for someone to change so drastically.
All those limiting beliefs fell away right before my eyes.
It made me confront some of my own thoughts that hold me back.
I’ve put myself in the same category as my father my whole life. But Tai is right. I’m like the rest of my family as well. I’m not just one thing.
It took incredible strength to hold himself accountable for what happened here all those years ago. I’ve never admired someone more.
For too long, I’ve viewed my strong personality and outspoken nature as a liability. I’ve felt the energy from those around me, on edge, waiting for me to say or do the wrong thing. I never got that feeling from Tai. It’s like he wanted me to step into my strength and not apologize for anything.
I worried love would feel like a cage. I was wrong. It feels like freedom. I’m tired of running. And if I’m going to run, I know Tai will be right there next to me.