Chapter 42
DIANA
Beep! Beep! Beep!
I stir against my pillow. My eyes peel open before they squint at my glowing phone screen. It flashes in warning. I smack the alarm off.
Then it goes off again.
“āiyā—” I slump over and grab it. I gasp at the screen, scrambling upright.
Oh my god.
It’s not my alarm.
It’s Kai’s.
His phone number roves across the call screen. The time stamp adds a second more to the ongoing five-hour phone call.
“Hm? C’est où?” Kai mumbles on the other end. His voice is so deep and husky with sleep, a hot flush rises to my cheeks.
Suddenly, what happened on the phone call last night comes rushing back: ranting and venting on the balcony, giggling and swapping childhood stories in our beds.
Kai’s alarm finally shuts off.
I quickly take him off of speaker and press the phone to my ear. My eyes nervously dart to Helen’s bedroom door. I slouch in relief when I can still hear her snoring.
Kai groans. I can hear his sheets ruffle as he stirs around in his bed. “Morning, Di.”
I can’t stop imagining his tousled black hair, his biceps flexing as he stretches into his rumpled bed sheets, his sweats slinging low on his hips.
I brace my forehead between my hands. It’s only the crack of dawn and filthy thoughts of Kai are already polluting my brain.
“Hi. I-I mean—” I gulp and shake my head. “Good morning.”
I can hear the lazy smile trail through Kai’s voice. “You alright there, princess?”
“Fine!”
“You sound a little flustered.”
“I do not. That’s just…” I scramble out of bed with more force than necessary. “You’re speaking nonsense, and I have to get ready.”
“Whatever you say,” he chuckles.
Kai doesn’t hang up. Instead, he stays on the phone with me while we both go through our morning routine together.
It’s so strange to brush my teeth and hear him gargling mouthwash on the other end.
It feels too intimate to start the day with him like this, yet it’s utterly comforting at the same time.
“Do you ever get freaked out that you’ll accidentally swallow your mouthwash?” Kai asks.
I spit out a mouthful of it with my heart pounding a little quicker.
“Practically every time I use it.”
We toss these simple, random questions back and forth as we make beds, pry open closets, and get dressed for the day.
With every little observation and question Kai raises, the ties binding me to him pull me in even closer and I can’t help but grasp at straws to keep talking to him and keep the goodbyes at bay.
But when our bags are packed and the sun finally comes up, there’s no other choice except to hang up.
I frown and slump my cheek into my hand. I fake an upbeat smile anyway. “Have a good day, Kai. I’ll see you later.”
“Wait, wait!”
I eagerly press the phone back to my ear.
Kai lets out a breath. “I wanted to thank you for being there for me last night. I know the sex helps us unwind and everything, but I also really love talking to you.”
Surprise catches me off guard.
He liked spending time with me?
I smile giddily into my hand. I draw in a deep, steadying breath to compose myself.
“W-Well, um...I love talking to you, too.”
“Yeah?” A playful lilt to his voice tells me he’s smiling.
“Yeah.” I blush. “You’re freakishly good at calming me down when I feel like ravaging a whole city.”
Kai laughs.
Even when we finally hang up, my cheeks are still pink from smiling so much. I try to get through the rest of my morning routine even though my thoughts are colored by green eyes, a deep, playful laugh, and visuals of the people Kai and I hate being flailed around Wallace’s zamboni.
For once, my unusually quiet phone doesn’t make me tense as much as it used to.
Bàba’s announcement last night feels easier to bear under the adrenaline running through my veins.
Everything might be an absolute mess right now, but I’m so relieved to have found Kai through the ruins.
For a moment, I think I can handle what’s being thrown my way.
Then I enter the Howler newsroom and see Andrea and Simon Valdis in my office.
My hands tighten around the box in my arms.
Andrea turns at the sound of my footsteps. Her smile hardly reaches the disdain in her eyes. “Oh, hey.”
I look around the newly decorated office. My glass and gilded decor have been piled into a corner and replaced by fairy lights and neutrals. A row of LED marquee letters spell out “Andrea’s Place” behind the desk.
“I see you wasted no time in getting your things in.”
Andrea shrugs and smiles at me. “Well, I figured: new editor, new decor, right?”
Rage trembles through my hands. It doesn’t help when a slimy smile stretches across Simon’s face as he looks me up and down.
“So, you’re the chick that Andrea is always going on about.”
I look at him, smiling acerbically with my head cocked.
And you’re the asshole I want to eviscerate.
Rather than looking like the son of a respected former NHL captain, he looks like a SoundCloud rapper who failed to reach stardom in his baggy shirt, basketball shorts, and ill-fitting cap that makes his blond hair stick out like mottled dryer lint.
“And you are?”
Simon’s smile falls and spite fouls his face even more. I’ve met too many boys like him in the newsroom: boys who use their privilege like a crutch and suppress anyone who challenges it.
Before I can give into the urge to throttle Simon, I charge towards the pile Andrea left behind.
“I don’t have time to dawdle. I’m going to grab my things and go.”
“Fine,” Andrea dismisses.
She and Simon go back to decorating. At one point, Simon curses and throws a tassel at the wall.
“I can’t fucking reach this high, Andrea!”
I snort as I pack away my lucky buddha. Suddenly, I feel Simon’s attention seer into me.
“What’s so funny?”
I turn around with my box fully packed. “I’m sorry. Am I not allowed to laugh?”
“You think this is funny, huh?” His mocking smile twists into a hateful sneer. “I’m surprised you’re still laughing after losing basically everything.”
Rage explodes like a scorching, blinding fire that burns away my manners.
Bàba once taught me how to win an argument. Don’t waste time defending yourself. Know your enemies’ weaknesses and bring them down to their knees.
“It’s called having some dignity,” I spat. “An attribute you have yet to embody.”
“Diana,” Andrea snaps. “Stop it.”
She turns towards Simon and tugs at his shirt. “Come on, Si, let’s just—”
He shrugs her off and jabs a finger at my face.
“You know, it’s always you people who think that now you’re allowed to take over, you can do whatever the hell you want. Don’t forget who gave you permission to be here in the first place.”
“This scene is starting to ring some bells…” I arch my brow. “Is this the part where you threaten to tell your father about this?”
“If you knew who he was, you wouldn’t be running your mouth.”
“How useless you must be if daddy has to come and fight all your battles.”
“What’s your fucking problem?”
The words freeze on my tongue, as realization hits me hard.
The reason is Kai, but no one can know that. If they do, they might connect the dots and expose the secret to ruin us both.
I slowly back away.
“Sorry,” I force out. “I-I’m just stressed from everything. I didn’t mean to attack you.”
The words feel like swallowing acid, but it’s enough to wear him down.
Simon nods, yet his disgust doesn’t fade. He simply turns around and snatches the tassels out of Andrea’s hand before quietly returning to decorating.
I walk out of the office with as much dignity as I can muster.
Andrea calls out to me in the hallway. “Diana!”
I sigh and turn around. She storms towards me with her nostrils flaring.
“Why do you have to ruin everything?” Her eyes flash with so much anger, tears well in them. “Simon was in there trying to help me and you insulted him!”
“Look, my words were uncalled for and I’m sorry,” I insist. “But he still shouldn’t have pushed you away like that.”
Andrea huffs. She avoids my eyes and crosses her arms. “He just gets mad easily.”
“You don’t need to justify his horrible behavior—”
“See, this is why you lost your position!” Andrea seethes. “A good editor would’ve never fired off at someone like that for no good reason. That’s why I should’ve been leading the Howler from the start and not you!”
I thought I raised you to be more competent than this.
You’ve been an embarrassment and a blight on this family.
Bàba’s words come flooding back in a crushing torrent that drowns all the fight I have left.
Andrea pales. She blinks, as if realizing what she just said. She backs away, her crossed arms unfurling.
“It’s good that you took over, then.” A forced smile stretches across my trembling lips. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have places to be.”
I leave the Howler and round the corner where no one can see me. I drop my box to the floor. Some of my things jostle and spill out.
Tears break out of my eyes. I slump down and hug my knees to my chest.
Just this morning, I was so giddy about my phone call with Kai. Now, the shards of everything I had built litter at my feet, and I’ve never felt more broken and ashamed.
This is not what my life is supposed to look like.
I’m supposed to be occupied with the CEO running and successfully balancing my duties at the HMG and the Howler.
I’m not supposed to be sneaking off to be friends with benefits with my crush.
But I can’t say I regret everything that’s happened either.
Being with Kai like this has been so liberating and exhilarating, I feel like I’ve had a chance to enjoy every minute that passes rather than racing through time to reach the bottom of my to-do list.
I swallow back the choked sobs in my throat. The heels of my hands press into my eyes.
How can everything be so new and exciting, yet horrifying and disastrous at the same time?
My phone suddenly pings and vibrates in my pocket. I suck in a deep breath.
“Just get through the day, Diana,” I whisper. “Put out one fire at a time.”
I flip over my phone. My eyes widen at the first notification I see.
It’s from CatchCo.
I spring to my feet, quickly wiping my tears away to read the email clearly. Rather than a long-winded report of the software’s findings, the email is only two sentences long because it’s not from CatchCo’s authenticators.
It’s an email from the CEO herself.
StellaDejvongsa@ Diana, I can help you. My availability and the address to my office building are all attached.
Come see me.