Chapter 76
DIANA
“Honestly, forget the Grouse Grind,” Luke groans. “You wanna test a hockey player’s physical endurance? Get him to move out all the crap from Diana’s room.”
His muscles flex as he hoists up a box of my heels and carries it to the moving truck parked outside.
After Kai signed his contract with the Vancouver Phoenix, everything changed. He moved out of the apartment in Kitsilano and bought a penthouse downtown for us.
Cleaning out Kai’s things was quick and easy.
Sadly, I didn’t have that luck.
Sunlight grazes across the mess of books, clothes, and shoes strewn across the floor.
“What are they going to do with everything else here?” Wallace asks. With his ribs still healing, he simply sits on my bed doing what he usually does: providing emotional support.
I tape up another box of clothes and shove it to the doorway for Kai, Luke, and Rowan to carry out.
“Well, since it’s just Sophia and me, I’m technically the oldest.” I sigh, a stray hair billowing up. “That means I’ll be sorting out all the paperwork.”
Wallace perks up with a dimpled smile. “Maybe Sophia will help you this time! I mean, she did save you, and she took down Edward and Matthias with us.”
I snort. “Knowing Sophia, she’d skip the paperwork and simply burn down the place.”
“That’s it!” Sophia huffs from across the room. “I am going to set this place on fire!”
I peek out of my doorway to see Sophia and the maids packing up the things in her room.
I eye the Jessica Lovelace novel poking out from under my bed, and glance back at Sophia.
I don’t know where we stand in our relationship now.
We aren’t close like before, yet we aren’t clawing at each other’s throats either.
As idiotic as it feels, I still hold onto the hope that one day, we might become sisters again.
Silently, I walk into her bedroom and hand her the Jessica Lovelace novel.
Sophia pauses. Surprise flickers in her eyes before it sours into an annoyed glare. “You were the one who took the last printed copy from the store?”
“Well, I was angry with you back then,” I point out.
Sophia falters at the reminder. Her annoyance wanes as she reaches for the book and hugs it to her heart, as if she were seeing an old friend for the first time.
“I’m sorry,” Sophia murmurs. “For what I did.”
A small, relieved smile settles on my lips. Sophia returns it, and I almost want to fling my arms around her, but I know it’d only make her retreat back into herself. All I can settle on is a dainty, curious shrug. “So, what are you going to do now?”
Sophia pushes herself up from the floor and starts tucking lip gloss bottles into her Angeline Vivienne purse. “Well, Uncle Frederik said he’ll take care of my tuition when I start majoring in fashion design next fall at DHU. As for the summer? I’ll be going far, far away to build up my portfolio.”
“Well, wherever you go, know that if you need help, I’m here,” I offer.
Sophia crosses her arms, yet her lips quirk up in thanks. Suddenly, she scowls at the doorway. “Just don’t bring him along if that ever happens.”
Luke leans against the threshold with his car keys swinging around his finger. In blue jeans and a classic James Dean white t-shirt, he’s the epitome of a blond nineties heartthrob.
Especially when he cocks his head, flashing that sly, amused smirk at Sophia.
“Pft! Please, I know you secretly lust after me. I bet there’s cutouts of my face lying around here.”
“Oh, I wouldn’t leave those lying around.” Sophia bats her lashes at him. “I’d have them chopped up and nailed to my dartboard.”
Luke chuckles. He moves from the doorway towards her, his steps slow and idle.
Sophia gulps, her icy veneer crumbling when Luke gets too close, taps her book, and whispers in her ear, “Sir Winterton dies in chapter twenty.”
Sophia gasps.
Luke winks at her and saunters off with a wave. “Nice talking to you, little demon!”
Rage flashes on Sophia’s face. “You brute!”
Surprisingly, the rest of the afternoon goes by quietly with zero bloodshed. Helen helps as much as she can with discarding some unwanted things.
My arm stretches beneath my bed to draw out another pile of books.
A little photograph slides out.
Eleven-year-old Diana stares back at me. Standing tall in her kitten heels, her hand proudly rests on the Huang family sculpture. Written on the back is coltish, awkward handwriting with three wishes:
1. Be the best journalist in the world.
2. Be a good leader.
3. Take over the HMG and make bàba proud.
Sadness pricks my heart when I look at her and the dreams she left behind for me to accomplish. I push myself off the floor and sink onto my bed.
Helen peeks over at me. “What’s the matter?”
My thumb runs over the girl in the photograph. “I feel like I’ve disappointed a part of myself.”
Doubt swarms my mind now, unsettling every certainty about how I want to live my life.
What if this is a sign that I’m making the wrong choice?
I’ve had my whole future figured out for me since I was a little girl.
Now, I’m steering my own ship, the captain’s wheel is taller than I thought, and I don’t know what half the buttons on the console do.
Starting my own media outlet sounded so exciting in my head, but now that it’s in my hands, it feels so different and intimidating that I don’t know if I can pull it off.
Helen runs her hands over my hair, consoling me with her touch as she sits beside me on the bed.
“Miss Diana, this girl and her ambitions have been bound to you for so long. It’s okay to mourn the life you thought you’d have in the pursuit of finding what it is you really want.
That doesn’t mean you’re on the wrong path.
There is tremendous grief in letting go of what isn’t meant to be and it’s alright to feel it while you’re smiling about where you’re headed next. ”
Helen squeezes my hands. She smiles with sunlight glowing across her face.
“Whatever happens in the next few months, I want you to know this: you will never lead yourself astray when you’re acting from the values of the person you want to be.”