Chapter 11 Dont Fall For Me #2
It was as if Ling had decided the safest way to protect them was to remove herself from Orm's orbit.
And it was working.
Orm was miserable.
One evening, she was sitting in the creative department long after everyone else had left when Fluke appeared at the doorway.
"You haven't gone home."
"Neither have you."
"I asked first."
Orm sighed.
"I'm finishing something."
Fluke stepped inside.
"You're thinking about Ling."
Orm glared.
"Why does everyone think they can read me?"
"Because you're very obvious."
"I am not."
"You are."
Orm closed her laptop.
"Did she say something to you?"
Fluke hesitated.
"No."
"You're lying."
"I'm not."
"You hesitated."
"That's because I was deciding whether telling you would get me murdered."
Orm stared.
Fluke sighed.
"Ling is complicated."
"I know."
"She doesn't do things halfway."
"What does that mean?"
"If she doesn't care, she doesn't care."
Orm's heart tightened.
"And if she does?"
Fluke looked at her.
"Then she cares too much."
Orm said nothing.
Fluke continued.
"That's why she scares herself."
Orm looked down.
"She told you that?"
"No."
"Then how do you know?"
Fluke smiled sadly.
"I've known her for a long time."
Orm leaned back in her chair.
"She kissed me."
Fluke froze.
Orm immediately regretted saying it.
"You heard nothing."
"I heard everything."
"Forget it."
"I can't unhear it."
"Please."
Fluke raised both hands.
"Okay."
Orm looked at him.
"She kissed me twice."
Fluke's eyes widened.
"Twice?"
"The second time the cameras weren't even recording."
Fluke stared.
Then he slowly sat down.
"Oh."
Orm looked away.
"Exactly."
For once, Fluke didn't joke.
"Then she isn't avoiding you because she doesn't care."
Orm swallowed.
"How do you know?"
"Because if Ling didn't care, she wouldn't need to avoid you."
The words stayed with Orm long after Fluke left.
?
Friday came.
The Aurelia team had arranged another interview.
Orm sat in front of the cameras while makeup artists touched up her face.
Across the room, Ling was having her microphone attached.
They didn't speak.
The interviewer arrived.
The cameras rolled.
The questions were harmless at first.
How had they met?
What did they admire about each other?
What made working together difficult?
Orm smiled.
Ling answered.
Then came the question that changed everything.
"What do you think makes a relationship feel real?"
Orm looked at Ling.
Ling was silent for a moment.
Then she answered.
"Trust."
The interviewer smiled.
"Why trust?"
Ling looked down.
Then she said,
"Because if you can't trust someone, you'll spend all your time wondering which version of them is real."
Orm's heart stopped.
The words felt like they had been spoken directly to her.
The interviewer nodded.
"And do you trust each other?"
Orm looked at Ling.
Ling looked at her.
The room seemed to disappear.
"Yes," Orm said.
Ling's expression softened.
"Yes."
The interviewer smiled.
"That's beautiful."
Orm wanted to laugh.
Beautiful.
If only she knew.
The cameras stopped.
The interviewer thanked them.
The crew began packing.
Ling stood immediately.
"I have a meeting."
Orm stared at her.
"Of course."
Ling paused.
She looked at Orm.
Something passed between them.
Then she walked away.
Orm watched her disappear.
That was it.
She was done.
?
She found Ling in the executive corridor.
"Ling."
Ling stopped.
Orm walked toward her.
"We need to talk."
Ling looked at her.
"About?"
"You."
Ling sighed.
"Orm."
"No."
Orm stepped closer.
"You don't get to do this."
"Do what?"
"Decide that we can kiss one day and pretend nothing happened the next."
Ling looked away.
"I never said nothing happened."
"You act like it."
"I'm trying to protect you."
"I don't need protection."
"You don't understand."
"Then explain it."
Ling was silent.
Orm's voice softened.
"Please."
Ling closed her eyes.
When she opened them, the composure was gone.
Just for a moment.
"I am scared."
Orm's anger disappeared.
"Of me?"
"No."
"Then what?"
"Of myself."
Silence.
Ling continued.
"I know what happens when I let someone close."
"Someone hurt you."
"Yes."
"And you think I'll do the same."
"No."
Ling looked at her.
"That's the problem."
Orm's breath caught.
"If I thought you'd hurt me, this would be easy."
She looked down.
"But I don't."
Orm moved closer.
"Then why are you pushing me away?"
Ling's voice cracked slightly.
"Because I don't know how to stop."
Orm's heart pounded.
"Stop what?"
Ling looked directly into her eyes.
"Caring."
Silence.
"You care about me."
Ling nodded.
"More than I should."
"According to who?"
"Myself."
Orm smiled sadly.
"You don't get to decide what you're allowed to feel."
Ling's expression tightened.
"I do when I'm trying to protect my life."
"Your life?"
"My career. Your career. The company. Aurelia."
Orm shook her head.
"You're hiding behind work."
"Because work is the one thing I know how to control."
"And me?"
Ling's voice became quieter.
"You are the one thing I can't."
?
Orm stared at her.
Everything suddenly made sense.
The distance.
The avoidance.
The coldness.
The way Ling refused to look at her.
She hadn't been rejecting Orm.
She had been fighting herself.
"Is that why you stopped bringing me coffee?"
Ling blinked.
Orm almost laughed.
"Sorry. That sounded stupid."
"No."
Ling smiled faintly.
"It wasn't."
"You noticed?"
"I noticed everything."
Orm's heart fluttered.
"Then why did you stop?"
"Because every time I brought you coffee, it felt like I was finding another excuse to see you."
Orm smiled.
"You could've just admitted that."
"I don't admit things easily."
"I noticed."
They stood in silence.
Then Orm asked,
"Do you regret the kiss?"
Ling shook her head.
"No."
"Do you wish it hadn't happened?"
Another pause.
"No."
"Then what do you want?"
Ling looked at her.
"I want to stop being afraid."
Orm's eyes softened.
"Then don't be afraid alone."
Ling swallowed.
She looked like she wanted to say something.
Instead, she whispered,
"Don't fall for me."
Orm stared.
"What?"
Ling stepped back.
"Please."
"Why?"
"Because I don't know what I'll do if you do."
Orm's voice softened.
"Maybe you should worry about what you'll do if I don't."
Ling's expression changed.
For the first time, Orm saw something dangerously close to panic.
"Orm..."
"I'm not asking you to promise me anything."
"Then what are you asking?"
"Just stop pretending you don't feel anything."
Ling looked at her.
Then, very quietly,
"Because if I keep doing this, I won't know where pretending ends anymore."
Orm's heart broke open.
She whispered,
"Maybe it already ended."
Ling closed her eyes.
"That's what I'm afraid of."
?
They stayed there for a long time.
Neither moved.
Neither touched the other.
The distance between them suddenly felt more intimate than any kiss.
Finally, Ling said,
"I don't want to ruin your career."
"You won't."
"The campaign could become a problem."
"We'll deal with it."
"You say that like it's easy."
"It's not."
Orm smiled.
"But I'm tired of being scared of things that haven't happened."
Ling looked at her.
"You're braver than you think."
"So are you."
Ling laughed quietly.
"Not when it comes to you."
Orm's heart skipped.
She reached for Ling's hand.
This time, Ling didn't pull away.
Their fingers intertwined.
No cameras.
No audience.
No script.
Nothing staged.
Just a choice.
A small one.
But real.
?
The following Monday, things weren't magically fixed.
Ling was still Ling.
She still worked too much.
Still drank coffee like sleep was optional.
Still frightened half the junior employees by walking silently into rooms.
Orm still argued with her.
Still challenged her decisions.
Still complained when Ling stole the last pastry from the office kitchen.
But something had changed.
Ling no longer avoided her.
When she wanted to speak to Orm, she did.
When she missed her, she didn't pretend she hadn't.
When Orm stayed late, Ling sometimes stayed too.
They didn't call it anything.
Not yet.
Perhaps they were both afraid that naming it would make it too real.
For now, they simply allowed themselves the small things.
A cup of coffee.