Chapter 6
CHAPTER SIX
Jaxon stared out the small oval window of the airplane, nervous anticipation racking his body as the familiar landscape came into view. Over the loudspeaker, the captain announced the descent, and something inside his chest tightened.
It was good to be home. Not that he’d be there long.
Just over a week from now, he’d be packing up and heading to Miami to start his new job anyway.
Through a friend, he’d learned of Vantage Security, a private firm that focused primarily on personal security detail.
Just getting off the ground, Vantage Security was open to anything they could get their hands on.
An ex-Marine himself, Knox Castillo looked for the brightest and best to bring various skill sets to the team, giving ex-soldiers something to do besides sit behind a desk all day.
And the fact that Vantage was located in Miami was an added boon—because Adalyn was there.
The past two years felt like a blur of activity, throwing himself from one mission to the next, but he hadn’t stayed quite busy enough to keep his mind from drifting back to a certain brunette.
He knew the likelihood of running into Adalyn in a city that size was slim to none, but his heart raced every time he thought about her—with anger, anticipation… lust. He’d had time to reevaluate his life after leaving Vegas—and Adalyn—behind.
She might have been thousands of miles away physically, but she was never far from his mind. There was something about her that called to him, something biological that had been a perfect complement to him. But she hadn’t wanted any of it. Or maybe she’d been denying herself.
Still, he couldn’t turn off the feeling that she was more than a one-night stand.
He’d really connected with her. She was smart and sexy and easy to talk to, and he’d appreciated that more than anything else.
For a moment, he allowed his thoughts to drift to her once more, wondering what she was doing right now.
He hoped her business was doing well. He knew from the way she’d spoken that she truly loved her job, and, even though part of him was mad at her, he wanted to see her succeed.
She’d be two years older, probably getting ready to settle down. Was she dating someone? Married? His hand clenched into a fist where it rested on his thigh, and his gut twisted into a knot at the thought of her with someone else.
Part of him wanted to look her up, to see if they still connected as well as they had that night in Vegas.
The other part dreaded seeing her. Did he really want to know if she was married to some nine-to-five desk jockey, living in the suburbs with a white picket fence and a baby on the way?
No way. Maybe it was time to bury the past and move on.
The plane bounced several times on the runway before coming to a stop, and people slowly began to file off.
It seemed to take forever to deplane, his nerves growing increasingly agitated with each moment that passed.
He grabbed his beat-up bag from where it was stored overhead then slipped into the flow of passengers headed toward the exit.
A familiar face so much like his own stood near the doors of the airport.
He flashed his brother a grin and strode toward him, wrapping him in a tight hug.
“How was the flight?”
He yanked on the strap of the duffel, pulling it higher on his shoulder as he made a face. “Long.”
He’d spent the past twenty-six hours either in the air or wandering airports, and now all he wanted was to get home. Somewhere familiar. Abel led the way to his truck, and he tossed his stuff in the back before climbing into the passenger seat. “How’s Emily?”
A bright smile lit his brother’s face. “Good. About five months along now.” Pride had his chest puffing out. “It’s a girl.”
“That’s awesome, man. I’m happy for you. You sure you guys don’t mind me crashing for a couple days?”
“Naw.” Abel flipped on his blinker to merge onto the highway. “Em can’t wait to see you. We’ve still got all your stuff packed up in the basement, so all you have to do is call the U-Haul.”
“I appreciate it.”
Abel and Emily had moved into their parents’ home after they’d been killed, and so many mementos of their childhood remained in that house.
He knew he’d find his old baseball glove and cleats buried in one of those boxes, and it brought a smile to his face.
It was the kind of home he wanted for his family one day.
His smile slipped away as a pair of steel-gray eyes invaded his memory.
Trees and telephone poles sped by in a blur as the miles bled away, taking him back to that night in Vegas with the woman he’d never forget.
Even the smallest things reminded him of her, and he wondered if that would ever change.
Dust rose behind the truck as Abel churned down the old gravel road to the farmhouse, and he rolled the window down, breathing in the fresh air.
There was something so pure, so clean about country air.
It wasn’t tainted by fumes or thick humidity or the sand that rose into the atmosphere, earth splintered apart by landmines.
Thank God that part of his life was over.
He was honored to serve his country, but now he was ready for the next phase of his life—settling down, starting a family.
He looked back on his mistake with Adalyn with a sense of resigned bitterness.
He’d have probably made a terrible husband anyway.
She would’ve been stuck home alone while he was halfway across the world, going to sleep every night wondering if he was safe—alive.
She’d reached out to him a couple times—short, succinct emails asking to talk. He’d almost given in. But it would’ve been pointless. He wasn’t good enough for her then and he wouldn’t be now. Besides, he’d seen this before; it was nothing more than a case of misplaced guilt.
Women felt bad for breaking things off right before their husband or boyfriend was headed right back into the heart of danger, and they’d beg for reconciliation without really meaning it.
He had no desire for Adalyn’s sympathy. As she’d requested, he’d signed the annulment papers and done his best to push her from his mind.
It was better for both of them this way not to drag it out.
He’d seen too many failed marriages between his friends and their wives and girlfriends back home.
No, when he married, he would do it right.
He’d take his time, make sure that they were compatible on all levels, that they were on the same page and wanted the same things out of life.
He would be there for his wife and kids, be home for dinner every night.
He didn’t want to miss birthdays and anniversaries and watching his baby’s first steps.
He just needed to make sure he didn’t make the same mistake as he had two years ago.
He’d let a pretty face and intense chemistry sway his emotions.
He was looking forward to settling down, but he could still feel the barb in his heart from Adalyn’s rejection.
Sometimes he resented her for turning him away.
Part of him prayed she wouldn’t sign the papers; despite her insistence that they annul the marriage right away, it’d taken near a year for her to file.
He deserved someone who was willing to meet him in the middle, but Adalyn hadn’t even been willing to try.
But… then why reach out to him? It was a question that had nagged him over the past couple years and, if he was really honest, it was quite possibly a huge reason he hadn’t allowed himself to move on just yet.
Deep inside there was still a small sliver of hope that maybe—just maybe—she regretted walking away from him.
Unfortunately, he had a feeling it was too late for all that.
Why would she wait for him when he’d been too much of a coward to even respond to her?
He could’ve emailed back, but what would he have said?
That he still loved her? She’d have laughed in his face—metaphorically speaking.
Had he ever actually loved her? Maybe not.
But she was the type of woman he could have come to love.
Or was it a fleeting moment of passion that had ended too soon?
They hadn’t parted on the best of terms, but what exactly did she expect from him?
Did she want an apology, an affirmation that what they’d done was wrong?
Because he wasn’t completely sure it was.
For that brief moment in time, he’d been happy.
She was different, special, and she made him feel like no other woman ever had.
What he wouldn’t give to go back in time to do things over, do things the right way.
When he got to Miami, he’d look her up… eventually.
He didn’t exactly relish the idea of seeing her with another man, but he had a feeling it was the only thing that would give him the kick in the behind that he needed to let go once and for all.
It sounded stupid to his mind, but his heart needed the closure.
He needed to see for himself that she’d moved on so he could do the same.
Adalyn’s molten gaze tormented him, the memory of that night still fresh in his mind.
He shook his head as Abel pulled the truck up alongside the barn.
He needed to scrub the memory of her from his brain.
How was it possible that a woman he’d been with once could still tempt him more than he thought possible?
A couple of dogs bounded over as he pushed open the door, and he bent to pat one on the head. The screen door slammed, and he glanced over to the house where Emily stood on the front porch, drying her hands on a dishtowel. She caught his gaze and waved, a huge smile on her face.
He grabbed his things out of the back, then followed Abel up to the house. He watched as his brother and Emily exchanged a heated glance, one of his brother’s hands going to her softly rounded stomach as he dropped a kiss on her upturned mouth.
Jealousy swirled in his heart, curdling deep in his stomach. He wasn’t envious of his brother—not exactly. He desperately wanted what Abel had—a beautiful wife, a baby on the way. A home. Emily and Abel had eyes only for each other, and he felt like a heel for breaking the moment.
“Hey, Em.”
A vibrant smile lit her face as she opened her arms for a hug. “Hey, yourself. You home for good?”
He pulled her into an awkward embrace, careful not to put any pressure on her swollen stomach. “For a bit. Got a job lined up in Miami.”
She stepped back, and Abel held the door for them. “Come on in and tell us all about it.”
He dropped his things in the spare bedroom, then meandered back down to the kitchen.
Fifteen years later, it still looked the same as it always had, with its sturdy oak cabinets and faded, peeling wallpaper.
He knew Abel’s job at the mill paid okay, but he wondered if he should offer some money.
Almost immediately, he dismissed the idea.
A man’s pride was a fickle thing, he thought with a grim smile.
Whether it pertained to women or wallpaper, no man wanted to be wrong.
A stack of mail lay on the corner of the table, and Abel tipped his chin toward it. “That came for you. Figured I’d keep it here rather than forward it on. God knows it woulda just ended up back here anyway.”
“No doubt.” As often as he’d been moved around, it took the mail a while to catch up to him sometimes.
Picking up the dozen envelopes, he flicked through them until a familiar name caught his eye.
Walker & Raines. And just like that, any hope he’d harbored for getting back together with Adalyn sputtered out, leaving his heart feeling empty and cold.
His thumb traced the return address of the envelope from the attorney.
It was over. Here in his hands, he held the proof that she’d never wanted him after all.
A myriad of emotions welled within him: anger, humiliation, rejection.
But one reigned supreme—disappointment. He wished…
he wished a lot of things. But none of it mattered now.
He was holding the paperwork that separated him from Adalyn, severing any last tie he may have had to her.
It was over. He tossed down the unopened envelope.
He didn’t need to read what was inside. Maybe one day… but not yet.