Chapter Thirty-Six
Adrian
Adrian woke before dawn with a sharp gasp.
The castle was too loud.
Not with voices or movement. Those he could manage. It was the way the walls seemed to breathe, stone inhaling and exhaling. The floor pressed rhythm into his bones until his pulse fell out of sync with his body.
Connor woke instantly. “Adrian. Hey.” He brushed hair out of Adrian’s eyes. “Talk to me.”
Adrian pressed a hand hard against his chest, fingers digging in as though he could anchor something that was trying to tear loose. “It’s too loud.”
“What is?”
“The valley,” he managed, eyes squeezed shut. “Everything’s humming. All the faultlines at once. Like they’ve found me.”
Connor pulled him close with firm arms. “Then stop listening.”
A hollow sound escaped Adrian. Something between a laugh and a breath. “I can’t ignore the ground.”
“Then listen to me instead.”
Adrian leaned forward, forehead resting against Connor’s throat, breathing shallow and uneven. “I can’t drown it out.”
Connor tightened his hold. “Then I’ll do it for you.”
The pressure didn’t ease.
By midday Adrian hadn’t eaten. The mark pulsed under his shirt, heat rising and falling in slow, relentless waves. He tried picking at his food but didn’t have any interest in it.
Connor watched him from across the study table. “How long have your hands been doing that?”
“Doing what?”
“That.” Connor pointed down.
Adrian looked down to see his hands working together, fingers forming a ball incessantly. He hadn’t realised he was doing it. “Oh. I’m not sure. Maybe since the ridge. Since the whatever you want to call it.”
“The Gift,” Connor said flatly, like the word tasted foul.
Adrian attempted a shrug. “It closed the fracture.”
“It’s breaking you.”
Adrian reached for his water. The glass slipped, shattered against the flagstones.
Connor was on his feet the moment the sound hit.
“Enough,” he said, crouching in front of Adrian and catching his wrists. “Look at me.”
Adrian did and immediately regretted it. There was no anger in Connor’s face. No judgment. Just raw fear barely contained.
“I can handle it,” Adrian said. “I’m strong enough.”
Connor’s voice dropped, rough around the edges. “Adrian. Strength isn’t silence.”
By dusk the mark’s heat had turned vicious. Not feverish, focused. It burned like it had weight, like it was pressing outward from under his skin.
Adrian’s shadow lagged and jerked when he moved, limbs folding at awkward angles.
Connor half carried him into the study.
“Sit.”
Adrian did, mostly because his knees no longer cooperated. Connor knelt in front of him, wrapping large hands around Adrian’s shaking ones.
“Tell me where it hurts.”
“Everywhere.”
Connor swore softly. “Adrian.”
“The Gift,” Adrian said. “It’s spreading.”
Connor surged upright. “I’m getting Xiathen.”
“No.” Adrian grabbed his sleeve. “It’ll pass.”
Connor stared at him for a long moment. “You’re shaking.”
“I know,” Adrian said. “Just stay.”
Connor didn’t hesitate. He sat down, closer this time.
Adrian leaned forward, resting his weight against Connor. “Something’s not right.”
“Tell me.”
“I think the Gift wants to use me again.”
Connor stilled. “Use you how?”
“The cracks are calling. Everywhere. Like the valley is begging to be fixed.”
“And what happens to you when you answer?”
Adrian’s voice thinned. “It hurts.”
Connor pulled him fully into his arms. “Then you’re not answering anything.”
“I don’t know if I can stop it.”
“Yes,” Connor said, fierce and immediate, “you can.”
Connor gathered him into his chest. Adrian froze for half a second then let out a deep breath.
“It’s too loud,” Adrian said. “Every fracture. Every whisper.”
“Love.” Connor tipped his chin up gently. “Look at me.”
Adrian did. Connor cupped his face. “Focus on your breathing. Hear my breath. Do it with me.”
That was all it took. Long minutes passed before Adrian’s breathing slowed.
“Better?” Connor asked softly.
“A little,” Adrian murmured. He smiled softly. “You’re very soothing when you want to be.”
“I try,” Connor grumbled.
Adrian’s hand settled over Connor’s chest. “I don’t want to die sealing a rend.”
Connor went still, then wrapped his arms tighter. “You won’t.”
“You can’t promise that.”
“I can so.”
Adrian laughed. His man was something else. “You can’t fight destiny.”
Connor’s jaw set. “I’ll fight that too. You won’t die. Not for the valley. Not for the Council.”
Adrian stilled, his heart stumbling once before settling again. Sleep claimed him and with it, the knowledge Connor would always have his back