Chapter Thirty-Nine
Sofia
Three days later
“Let me the fuck in to see my brother now,” I grit out to the warriors on duty.
The past few days have been hell. Ryan spiraled after the fight, wild and volatile until he had to be tranquilized, and then Jackson had to restrain him with silver chains scavenged from the warehouse.
Since then, he’s been locked in the pack cells.
And I’ve been locked out, waiting for my wound to heal fully while Doc insisted I stay in the pack hospital.
And Luca wouldn’t let me near my brother, even though he’s been okay since the full moon entered the waxing stage.
But now that Doc cleared me, this is it.
No more excuses. Not that I would have listened to reasons to keep me away, but the warriors on duty weren’t budging, and I needed to heal so that I could focus on kicking Luca’s ass.
“I’m sorry, Luna,” Cadence replies with a wince, and at least she sounds conflicted. “Alpha Rivera’s orders.”
“Cadence, I don’t want to hurt you. I really, really don’t. But I’m going in there, and if you don’t stand back right the fuck now—”
“That will be all,” Luca's voice cuts in, smooth and infuriating. He walks out of the cells and joins us. Arms crossed, I fix him with a glare as the warriors retreat, leaving us alone.
I fold my arms across my chest and glare. “Doc cleared me. You’re out of excuses.”
Luca heaves a sigh. “It’s not me stopping you. Ryan doesn’t want to see you. He’s not in a good way. Doc said he has maybe a month or two left. He doesn’t want to fight it anymore.”
Getting shot again would hurt less. “No,” I say, shaking my head. My heart pounds against my ribcage, and my breathing turns rapid. “No. That is bullshit. I’m not losing my only family!”
I shove him hard. He doesn’t move an inch. His face is too soft, his eyes stripped of their usual cocksure glimmer. Like he’s already mourning. Already accepted this. It only makes me angrier. “No!” I slam my fists against his chest again. “No!”
“I’m sorry.”
Why is he acting as if Ryan is past the point of saving? It’s not true. He’s going to be fine
“No!” I yell, pushing him again. “No!” I hit him, and he just stands there.
Stoic and infuriating. Tears stream down my face as he pulls me into a hug.
My breath hitches as a sob catches in my throat.
I push him back, my hands flat against his chest, but he grips me tighter, his arms a steel cage around me, holding me as I fall apart, as everything I’ve been holding in spills out.
My shoulders shake with the force of my sobs; each gasp is a desperate attempt to regain control.
He doesn't say anything, he just holds me. The world narrows to the feel of his arms, the sound of my own ragged breaths, and the overwhelming ache in my chest. “I can’t lose him,” I sob.
“I know, Princess. I know. I’m trying to get him to come around. He’s not listening to me.”
“Let me in there, Luca. You fucking shot me. You owe me this,” I say, poking his chest as my anger rises again. He winces at my words and has the good sense to look remorseful. He has apologized a hundred times. But it’s not enough.
I rub my hands across my cheeks, wiping away the tears before my gaze locks with Luca again. We stand fixed in a staring match, waiting to see who will give up first. It won’t be me.
“Fine,” he says finally. “Doc cleared you? And don’t lie to me. I’ll find out, and you won’t like my response if I learn you lied to me.”
“You really think you have a leg to stand on here, Beta?”
“Don’t test me.”
“Ugh. You are unbelievable,” I say, throwing my hands up in the air. “Mindlink him to confirm if you must. Doc cleared me right before I came here. Now, how about you go fuck all the way off and get out of my damn way?”
I glare at him, wondering why the hell he’s still blocking me. “Now, Luca.”
He finally stands back, and I burst straight through the door.
Nothing could have prepared me for what I find.
Ryan is… he’s broken. He sits on the bare cot—the only furniture in the cell he is in—his head bowed forward, his elbows resting on his knees.
The silver bars keep him locked in, but they also reduce his wolf’s strength.
“It’s time, Ryan. You need to take a mate. Either you head over to Iron Fang and figure out which of those omegas is your mate or you take a chosen mate. I don’t care who, but you need to do it now.”
“No,” he replies without looking at me. “She’s not there. My wolf wasn’t remotely interested in any of them. It’s too late. I’ve run out of options.”
“What the fuck is wrong with you? You can’t give up!” If we weren’t separated by silver bars, I would strangle him. How the hell am I going to get him back? He’s so defeated he can’t even see any other options.
“You’ll be a great luna, and Luca can be alpha. You don’t need me. The pack doesn’t need me.”
“Bullshit. Whatever part of your brain is telling you that is lying to you. Not taking a chosen mate is suicide. It’s not giving yourself a chance to feel better. I’m standing here telling you I need you. Stop listening to that voice.”
“This is the reason you need to accept your bond with Luca. If I’m not supposed to find my mate, then you can become alpha and luna of Lunar Eclipse.” His voice is flat, despondent. Like he’s already gone.
“I don’t want to be luna!” I yell at him. “And I refuse to accept this. You need to take a chosen mate. It’s the only option.”
“I can’t. There’s no one I want, no one my wolf will consider.”
“See, that’s the problem. You and your damn wolf are too stubborn. You need to start considering it. You need to go to therapy and work out why you’re letting your mommy issues literally destroy you.”
Ryan’s eyes go so wide they look like they could pop out, but then he barks out a harsh, humorless laugh. “You’re not serious?”
“You go to therapy, or you take a chosen mate right now. Hell, I’ll go pick someone out for you myself.”
“Fia, stop,” he snaps. I glare at him, but at least he’s got a little of his spark back. “My wolf doesn’t give a shit. Talking about it isn’t going to change anything. I’m still going to go moon mad. It’s not like I have a say in any of it.”
“Bullshit. Stop blaming your wolf. My wolf wanted Luca the moment we found out we were mates. My human part was still going to reject him. Emily rejected her fated mate. Our wolves don’t control everything. You’re the problem, Ryan. You.”
“Ryan,” Luca interrupts. “You need to give it a chance. I get you don’t believe there’s any hope, and maybe there’s not, but how would you feel if the roles were reversed? If Sofia was going to let herself die rather than try to get help.”
My heart pounds in my chest, and I hold my breath.
Tears well in my eyes again, partly because of the fear of losing my brother.
Partly because of my gratitude to Luca for having my back on this.
He doesn’t believe in mental health or therapy, thinking it’s a human issue. But he is backing me anyway.
“Please Ryan. Please don’t leave me like they did. Please fight. For me?”
Ryan drops his head into his hands and runs them through his hair. When he looks up at me again, he nods.
“Fine,” he mutters. “Set it up. Use my card. But I’m staying in the cells. I’ll do online sessions.”
And then the tears come. I couldn’t hold them back for another second. I sink to the floor, and Luca pulls me into his arms. Steady and strong. Everything I need right now.
He carries me out of the cells and back home—to our house.
When did his place become home? Because it did.
Somewhere along the way, I stopped fighting him.
He refuses to put me down, despite my protests.
And it’s nice. I’m tall and strong. I’m not the kind of girl who needs to be carried. But right now, I want to be cared for.
Luca heads straight for the bedroom when we get home, depositing me onto the bed. He takes my sneakers off and pulls the covers back. Like I’m breakable.
Well, I’m not.
“I have a few things I need to do. Can I get you anything before I go?”
Disappointment unfurls in my stomach, a knot tightening as the seconds tick by. My shoulders slump, and heavy weariness settles in my limbs. A subtle tremor runs through my hands as I stretch them out. A sigh escapes my lips, carrying the weight of unmet need.
“Princess?”
I look at him, my chest aching, heart raw. “Yeah, you.” My voice trembles. “I’m ready to accept the bond.”
I lick my suddenly dry lips when Luca winces, like he’s in pain.
“Not now. You nearly died. You lost friends in the battle. You’re terrified of losing your brother.
My wolf might be trying to tear through me to get me to shut up right now, but I’m not letting you accept our bond until you’re doing it for the right reasons. ”
It would hurt less if he clawed his way into my chest and ripped my heart out. I draw my legs up and cross my arms, looking away from him. Feeling raw and emotional, like he stripped me of all my defenses, only to leave me alone.
“Just leave Luca; you’re good at that.”
“Princess,” he says, his tone taking on a dark edge. He clasps my chin and forces me to look at him. I hate this. I’m vulnerable, and it’s awful. “Have you not been paying attention to how utterly obsessed with you I am?”
He strips his henley top off, then opens his belt, moving slowly, staring at me all the time. He kicks off his boots before sliding his jeans and boxers down his thick thighs. I’m frozen as he climbs onto the bed. He spreads my legs and settles himself between my thighs.
My panties grow damp, and I hate this. The way he can make my body sing, unlike anyone else before.
The way every nerve ending craves his touch.
Extending his claws, he rips through my leggings and underwear.
My top is next, then my bra, until I’m lying in the shredded ruins of my clothing while he hovers above me.
Heat radiates from him, and his scent overwhelms me.
He notches my entrance with the tip of his hard length, rubbing it up and down my slit, gathering my wetness before circling my clit. I shudder and bite down on my lower lip to stop myself from moaning at the barely there touches that already have me ready to follow this male off a cliff.
He hovers over me, and I feel his stare burning into me as my own gaze remains firmly on his muscular, inked chest. My eyes sting with tears. I don’t know if it’s the humiliation of his rejection or the shame of still needing to be close to him that stings worse.
“Look at me.”
I shake my head, hating this version of me. But I can’t look at him right now. I can’t see his handsome face, his eyes that remind me of the bluest sky, the smirk he wears so well.
“You don’t get my cock unless you look at me.”
That does it. I might hate that I want him, but I can’t deny that it’s true. I hate how well he knows me. Shame burns me from the inside out, but I raise my eyes to him and give him my best glare. He sinks into me in one swift, firm motion, and I cry out.
“You’re such a brat.”
“Am not,” I snap back, looking away again. But he clasps my jaw and forces me to look him in the eye.
“You are the most infuriating female I have ever met. And I love every bratty inch of you,” he says as he thrusts slowly into me.
“I, Luca Taylor, beta of the Lunar Eclipse Pack, accept you, Sofia Rivera of the Lunar Eclipse Pack. I’ve always been yours, Princess.
And as soon as you’re ready to be mine, I’ll mark this beautiful shoulder of yours,” he says, kissing my marking spot.
“But I’ll be ready enough for both of us until you are. Bite me, Princess. Make me yours, even while you’re not mine.”
He thrusts into me, hard and fast, exactly how I want him.
How I need him. He flips our positions so that he’s on his back and I’m straddling him.
I grind my hips against him as my canines descend.
The taste of the serum that will imbue my scent in him floods my mouth, but I continue to ride him, pushing us both closer to the edge.
Only when I’m right at the precipice of falling apart, do I fall forward and sink my teeth into Luca’s flesh at the junction where his shoulder meets his neck.
He holds me still while thrusting up into me once, twice, and then filling me with his hot release. My teeth withdraw, and I lick over the mark. Healing him and sealing my scent inside his body forever. I push up, enough to kiss him. Deep and slow, like it’s the start of forever.
“Let me be worthy of you.”
“You do realize you just bound yourself to me without the reverse right? You won’t be able to leave me, but I could still leave you.”
“It’s cute that you think I would ever let you get away and that there was ever a chance of me leaving you. I’m yours, always will be.”
He pulls me into a kiss, filled with the promise of forever.
I snuggle into him until he tells me he really does have to go attend to some pack business, but he’ll be back as soon as possible. And that if I’m not in this bed naked and waiting, that he will hunt me down and remind me who I belong to.
I might have to find somewhere else to be and see what he has in mind. But first, I have things of my own to do.