Chapter 45
Chapter Forty-Five
Sofia
The bitter smell of coffee grounds hangs in the air, sharp and comforting all at once. I scoop them into the filter, the faint crunch against paper loud in the quiet cabin. The machine sputters as the first drops hiss into the pot. Fates, I need so much caffeine after last night.
My hands wrap around the edge of the counter, grounding myself in the mundane after last night’s marathon of sex, sweat, and Luca…
Damn, he was everything I didn’t know I needed.
The way he refuses to let me hide behind sass and the walls I carefully built over the years.
I had to put on a strong front, but he sees right through it. He sees me.
My body aches, deliciously so, and my chest still hums with that soft, dangerous glow of being cared for. I’m not used to it. But I’m starting to feel like that could change. That being cared for could become normal.
A sharp rap on the door pulls me from my reverie.
“I’ll get it,” Luca says. His tone is light, but his scent sharpens. Anticipation and… worry. Something in my stomach knots, and I want to go back to the peace of only seconds ago. “Come on in, Alpha.”
My breath hitches. Ryan was so sure about staying in the cells, so what is he doing here now? But then Luca moves back and reveals who our visitor is.
“Hi, honey.”
The world tilts. My dad steps inside, his head ducked low, looking at me through his lashes. His shoulders are hunched, his hands shoved deep into the pockets of his jacket, as though he’s trying to make himself smaller. He’s nervous. Nothing like the male who raised me until I was fourteen.
“Your mate suggested I get over myself and start showing up for you and your brother.”
My eyes snap to Luca. He shrugs, his hands sliding casually into the pockets of his jeans, but there’s nothing casual about the hard set of his jaw.
Dad’s voice cracks when he adds, “He’s right. I… I needed to hear it. I don’t deserve your forgiveness. When your mother left… I didn’t want to…” he trails off and even though part of me wants to rescue him from this disaster of an apology, I don’t.
It wasn’t just the way he stopped physically being there.
He shut me out mentally too. I was the one leading every conversation when I visited him.
And there’s only so many times I could tell him about what was going on in my life to get nothing back before I stopped trying.
He didn’t even react to the bad stuff. Like getting in trouble in school, or when I joined the cheer squad knowing full well that it’s forbidden for shifters to take part in human sports.
“I know how badly I let you down, honey. If you want to throw me out on my ass, I’d understand. But I need you to know how sorry I am about how selfish I’ve been. I… I want to be there for you and Ryan. If you’ll have me.”
My eyes sting with unshed tears. I would have snapped at him to fuck off and go back to ignoring me before. To crawl back into whatever hole he’d buried himself in after Mom left. To keep hiding.
But that was before. Before Luca pulverized my defenses and knocked down all my walls.
“What if it’s too late?” I ask, needing to know if he’s ready to make the effort. Ready to fight for me.
Dad flinches. His hands twitch as if he wants to reach for me, but he doesn’t dare.
“Then I’d understand, honey. Goddess knows it’s taken me way too long.
But I’m going to be here anyway. You get your stubborn streak from me, remember?
I’ve been stubbornly staying away. Maybe it’s time to stubbornly stick around. ”
My throat burns. My chest aches. This is the closest he’s come to a real apology. And still—part of me braces, waiting for him to backtrack, to vanish again.
Luca steps forward, pulling me into his arms. His warmth presses into me; his scent curls around me, steadying me. Grounding me in his safety. I tilt my face up to his, searching his expression. “You did this?”
“I’m going to be honest; I didn’t tell you in case Alpha Elliot wasn’t ready to show up. I didn’t want to set you up for any disappointment. If you’re not ready, that’s completely understandable.”
I nod my head, knowing without a shadow of a doubt that he’s right. I wouldn’t have wanted to hear about him talking to my dad. I wouldn’t have believed he would actually turn up.
“I want you to accept our bond, Princess. I want that more than anything. But not because you feel alone or that you don’t have a family.” Luca’s voice is steady, quiet, but the weight of it fills me with security.
My eyes sting and my throat burns. This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. It’s the most supported I’ve felt in years. “I know I’m not alone; I have Emily,” I say, rolling my eyes to try to claw back some equilibrium after feeling way too exposed.
Luca squeezes me but doesn’t say anything. The look in his gaze is enough. He knows exactly what I’m doing—hiding behind sarcasm like it’s a shield. I never thought I’d miss our constant sniping at each other, but this vulnerability is a whole other experience.
Dad clears his throat, pulling my focus back. “I was hoping maybe I could take you for breakfast. And then we could both go talk to Ryan together.” His mouth tilts, tentative. “Do you still love the blueberry pancakes at Ronnie’s Diner?”
“You remember that?”
“Honey, I’m your dad. I know I’ve let you down. I know I should have been here. But I never stopped loving you. I just—” His face twists, voice thick. “I thought you were better off without me. And I needed someone to tell me otherwise.”
He nods to Luca, who drops a kiss on my temple. Warmth spreads through me, and the tears I have been holding back finally break through. Luca holds me tight, whispering to me through the mindlink that it’s okay if I’m not ready yet, that I can take as much time as I need.
I don’t know if he’s talking about accepting him or accepting my dad. But maybe it doesn’t matter. Either way, I’m done running. I’m ready to stop being scared.
“Throw in a milkshake and I’m there,” I manage, voice shaking.
Dad grins at me. His eyes crinkle, the deep frown lines around his mouth softening until he looks almost like the man I used to know. Like the man who used to let me sit on his wolf’s back when I was small and kissed my scraped knees.
The sight cracks something open in me I didn’t know was still there. It’s a small thing, this flash of genuine happiness, but it feels huge. Monumental. I haven’t seen him smile since before my mom took off.
I turn to Luca, hoping he’ll understand that I need to do this on my own. “I’ll see you later?”
“Slacking off training again?” he asks with a raised brow and that damn smirk I’ve grown to love. “Have fun, Princess. I’ll catch up with you later.”
He drops a chaste kiss on my lips that I’m sure is because he doesn’t want to make my dad uncomfortable, and then he heads out. Stopping to shake my dad’s hand on his way. The two of them exchange a nod, some silent acknowledgment passing between them.
And for the first time, I don’t have any nerves about Luca walking away. Because I know he’s coming back. I know he loves me. And I’m ready to let him.
I shake my head to shake away the thoughts of Luca for the moment and focus back on my dad.
“Ready to go, honey?”
I take a deep breath and nod. Going for breakfast with my dad. No big deal. It’s only blueberry pancakes and maple syrup. Fates, why is this more nerve-wracking than driving into a literal battle?
I mindlink Emily en route to let her know I need girl time and debrief ASAP, and thankfully she tells me to come over anytime.