Chapter 36
I Tell Her Too Much
JESSICA
Footsteps in my room rouse me from my deep slumber. Through sleepy eyes, I look around the room.
Sixes hangs a garment bag on a hook on my closet door.
“Well, aren’t you a little slut,” she teases.
“What’s that? Three in two weeks?” She approaches the foot of my bed.
I’m naked and sticky. I feel cum dripping down my inner thighs.
I grab the blankets and throw them over me, hiding my body and my head at the same time.
“Two,” I mumble under the covers. Serves me right for telling Sixes everything.
She busts out laughing. “Couldn’t you wait until after you met the other nine men?” She pokes at my feet. “Must have been pretty good if he put your insomniac ass to sleep.”
Goddess, she really does know everything. I grunt in response.
“Come on, sleepyhead. Time to get ready. Carmen wants to meet with you before you go to hair and makeup. She wants to review the day’s schedule.” Her voice grows fainter as she walks toward my bathroom. “Oh, and Anders wants to speak to you. Lucky for you, I arrived first.”
I bolt up straight, catching the falling blankets and tucking them around me before they drop to my waist. “Anders almost came in here?” I ask, incredulous.
“Yep,” she answers, popping the p.
Of course he would. Half the time, I’m awake. So why wouldn’t he? Heat flames my cheeks at the thought of Anders finding me naked, smelling like sex and Shadow in my bed.
I tug the sheet around me, slide off the mattress, and rush toward the bathroom.
Sixes stands inside the linen closet and turns to me with an annoyed expression on her face. “I can’t find the extra linens,” she grumbles. Out of thin air, a sheet set appears in her arms. It never ceases to amaze me every time she does that.
I snort. “I’m not sure why you even bother to look for anything when you can do that.”
She shrugs and walks back to the room.
I head for the shower when I remember I have a question about Shadow.
She holds up my ripped camisole. “A little aggressive, were we?” she asks with a smirk.
Heat rises from my chest up to my face. I clear my throat. “What happened to Troy Larson? I could have sworn he was the Young Alpha,” I ask, ignoring her still holding up my top.
Her face transforms from good-humored to confused before she turns away from me.
“Sixes? Did something happen to Troy while I was gone?” I cover my mouth briefly. “Did Shadow do something to him, to Tobias, to become Alpha?”
She sighs and faces me again; she lets out a breath. “No, nothing like that. Troy stepped down as Young Alpha, and Tobias retired.”
My shoulders drop in relief. “Why is he here?”
“At one time, Shadow was your world, and you were his.”
I frown. “Yes, but that was before the Resistance corrupted him.”
“I don’t know all the details. The guards and I are looking into it.
I have a feeling he is here because he is still crazy about you.
Think about it. Despite his vow to torture you and make your life miserable, he hasn’t really done anything horrible to you.
I know that he threatened to kill you, but that was right after Emily’s death.
They were…” She makes a gagging sound and covers her mouth.
“They were…” She silently gags again, scrunching her face as she swallows.
“They were close. Anyway, I think you should meet the rest of the men and see where your heart leads you.” Suddenly, the sheet wrapped around my body disappears and lands in her upturned hand.
“Seriously?”
She gives me a cheeky grin.
Showered and dressed, I exit my room to find Anders and Carmen. Skip and Matt, my guards, stand on either side of my door.
“Good morning, Alpha Princess,” Skip says in a singsong voice. “Did you sleep well?” he asks.
I eye Skip warily. Were they standing by my door all night? I was so exhausted by the time I got to my room. I can’t remember who exactly escorted me back. I look over to Matt, and his cheeks pinken. Shit. Did they hear me? I wasn’t exactly quiet, and neither was Shadow.
“Yes, I slept well. Thank you for asking,” I reply, avoiding Skip’s amused grin.
“Did you have a good start to your day so far?” he jokes.
Skip, Matt, and I went through the recruit program together.
Skip and Jeremy were the class clowns. Matt is kind of like Elijah in a lot of ways—quiet and shy.
Well, he turned shy with me once he discovered I was a girl, not one of the guys.
Prior to that, he liked to help Skip and some of the others play pranks on me in the beginning.
I roll my eyes at Skip. He is such a gossip. He leans in as if to tell me a secret. “So, which one was it? How did you get him past us?”
Matt’s face reddens even more.
“What makes you think it was a man?” I wiggle my fingers and give him a passive smile. He snorts, but before he can remark, Anders stands between us.
“Thank you, gentlemen. I have it from here.” The two men nod, step around us, and leave. I couldn’t be happier to see Anders.
“Good morning,” I greet Anders.
He nods. “Good morning. Could I have a moment with you in my office? It won’t take long. I understand Carmen would like a word with you before your day starts.”
I follow Anders to his office, which is in the same wing as our living quarters. I miss Alpha Agnus’s home. It saddened me when I learned we were moving into the castle. A majority of the filming will be done here. My room for now is only temporary.
Once the show is over and I choose my mate, I’ll move to another wing to share with him.
I hoped that we could move into Alpha Agnus’s home, but my mother insisted that living in the castle with the guards made the most sense.
Plus, she mentioned Anders, Joe, and Xavier living under the same roof as my husband, and I wouldn’t be comfortable for everyone.
After seeing Skip's and Matt’s faces this morning, I guess she is right.
We reach Anders’s office, and he gently closes the door.
His office here is much bigger in size, and they installed floor-to-ceiling shelves and custom filing cabinets.
A large mahogany desk similar to the one he once had sits to one side, with two armchairs in front.
I take a seat. I notice the floor is bare, and the shelves are not quite full of the books he had in his previous office.
“I’m still putting it all together,” he says as he sits behind his desk.
I glance around and smile. “I see you’re preparing for all of your books to arrive.”
He mirrors my smile. “Yes. I didn’t realize I had so many. Some will go in the library. I moved some of Aggie’s books from her office here, and I left it to Miller to decide what he will keep and what he will have in the—”
My heart jumps. “We have a library?” I ask, bursting with excitement.
He laughs. “Yes. You should go see it when you have a moment. You’ll be impressed at how well some of the books held out. I hired some men to restore the library, as well as some of the books that are worse for wear. I hope you don’t mind. I couldn’t help it.”
I make a note to put some of my books in there, instead of in my room or office. For the first time in two weeks, the prospect of living here doesn’t feel so grim.
He shakes his head and laughs at me again. “You and your books.”
“Look who’s talking,” I tease.
A guilty smile crosses his face. “Anyway, I wanted to check on you, and I have some questions.” His expression becomes more serious.
“Joe told me that the original battery pack to your mic was not dead after all. With the commotion, he managed to pocket the battery that the sound man injured you with and replaced the original battery back in its place, and it worked.”
“I figured as much. I think it was a test to see where the guards were posted and identify their reactions when I am slightly injured. We failed miserably. A small hiss and everyone left their posts. The twins reacted. We can’t let that happen again.”
“I’m aware. I spoke to both Alexis and Odyssey about it. But there’s more.”
“More?”
He clears his throat. “It was brought to my attention that your magic stopped last night.”
I roll my eyes. “And who told you that?”
“The twins. Justin noted that he and Jeremy couldn’t hear your thoughts for the last three introductions, and Joe confirmed this as well.
Sodie mentioned that your hand didn’t heal on its own.
He needed to use magic to heal you. Have you noticed any other changes or the inability to wield your other magic? ”
I look away, thinking about when I tried to strike Shadow with my lightning magic. I felt no electrical charge, and my chest was empty. I rub at my sternum. Much like it is now. “So, you think that—”
“This is the same fucking bullshit we went through almost eight years ago.”
“What would you like to do about it?” I brace myself for his rage to shut this all down.
“We keep this amongst ourselves. Play it off like nothing is wrong. You might not have magic, but you’re strong, smart, and observant. You trained with the best fighters I know.”
“Including you.”
He smiles. “There’s always someone out there who is better. That’s why I exposed you to as many different skillsets as I could procure. It was the best I could do for you.”
“So humble of you,” I mock him with a grin.
“My ego means shit if I don’t have you and your brothers in my life. I hope you know that.”
“I do.”
I almost feel guilty for not telling him that my shoulder still burns and my exhaustion, despite getting some sleep, is still present. Maybe there’s something more to that scratch on my back than we realize.
“Good. Now, I don’t want to take up much of your time. At some point during the day, can you please see Sodie? I asked him to conduct another exam and more blood testing, now that I know what we’re looking for.”
“Okay. And thank you for not yelling at me or stopping me from continuing this… game.”
“I’m not an idiot, little one. I know if I stand in your way, I’ll lose you. So, I will do what I taught hundreds of guards to do—fight for what you believe in. I believe in you.”
“I will fix this,” I tell him. “I will fix this so no one else needs to endure what you went through, what we all went through.”
The Resistance is trying to weaken me, but I have a plan. The Resistance will end with me.
Carmen walks into the sunroom set up for me to relax and eat. Her heels click against the wooden floor. The energy around her tingles with a mixture of irritation and annoyance.
“Good morning, Jessica.”
I offer a small smile and a curt nod.
“I want to go over the day’s schedule with you.”
I ignore her haughty tone and simply eat my food.
“After you finish your meal, it’s off to hair and makeup.
You will meet two contestants, take a break for a late lunch, freshen up, and meet three more contestants.
Then, you will have another break with a chance to freshen up, change into your evening dress, and meet the remaining four.
We set up the first meets in different areas of the castle, so the breaks work out as we move to different locations.
We will do a short check-in with you and your thoughts on all the contestants thus far.
Then, we will proceed to the meet-and-greet gathering with all twenty-five contestants.
We will wrap up the night with the first five eliminations and the first impression rose.
Dr. Parker approved the number of breaks between filming, and he also insisted that you eat regularly between takes. ”
“I thought the first eliminations were to take place after the first challenge?”
Carmen tries to mask her annoyance, but it doesn’t work. Whatever is up her butt amuses me,
until she starts tapping her long fingernails on the table. “Yes, well, that was the original plan. However, we are a day behind schedule. Eliminations need to happen today.”
“Sounds good,” I reply. I already compiled a mental list prepared of who I want to eliminate from the lineup. The father-son team are among them. That’s just weird.
She huffs. Did she want me to argue with her?
“Are there rules or a process I need to be aware of before I make my decision?”
“No.” She pauses. “This round is entirely up to you. From here on out, the viewer votes will influence some of your decisions as well as some of the producers’ input.”
Of course, the producers would have a say in this. I bet Gary didn’t mention the producers’ involvement on purpose. “Okay.” I return to my plate and begin to eat again.
Carmen’s energy pushes. She wants to say something, maybe even pick a fight with me.
Curiosity gets the better of me, and I decide to bite.
I lay my fork down and fold my hands together.
Giving her my full attention, I ask, “Anything you want to get off your chest before I finish my breakfast?” I allow some of my own energy to push against hers.
She doesn’t answer me right away. The wheels turn as she contemplates her response.
I stare pointedly at her and raise a brow. When she remains silent, shifting her eyes away, I unclasp my hands, pick up my fork, and place a forkful of eggs into my mouth.
Her energy shrinks back into herself. She clears her throat. “What is your relationship with Alpha Larson?”
I take my time chewing and swallowing, meeting her eyes. “There is none.”
“I rewatched the footage from last night, Jessica. Do I need to remind you that you signed a contract—”
I raise my hand, stopping her lecture. “I am not in any relationship. I wouldn’t be here if I was.
” I hold her skeptical gaze for a few seconds.
I know my answer won’t be enough for her.
I take a drink from my glass of water. “Remember, in my interview, when I said I had fallen in love four times, and one of them wants to kill me?”
Her eyes widen. “He’s the one who wants to kill you?”
“Yeah. It’s a long, sad story. I wish it was different, but that seems to be a common theme in all of my relationships.”
“He still loves you. I could see it on his face when I watched the footage. I could see it in the way he stood in front of you in the clinic. He wanted to protect you. That’s not good acting. Trust me. I can spot fakes a mile away.”
“I don’t know. I’m confused. A part of me fears him, and some part of me misses the man I fell in love with.”
Carmen absentmindedly nods her head. She tilts her head, conjuring more questions, but I don’t want to answer them right now. So, I avoid looking at her and focus on eating my meal.