Chapter 72
I Loved You First
JESSICA
Six Years Ago
The blood moon hovers over Quartz Lake. The body of water is undisturbed, tranquil, and smooth like glass. Strong arms wrap around me, pulling me into a solid body of muscle. I melt into his warmth. I missed how he felt, how safe and strong he always made me feel.
My long hair rests just above my waist. He moves it to the side, seductively trailing soft kisses down my neck. My entire body tingles with small bursts of electricity. My muscles tremble with desire. I inhale deeply, wanting to ingrain his scent into my memory permanently.
“How did you find me?” I ask, my voice husky with desire.
“I’ll always find you. Our bond binds us together.” His large hands roam over my body, slowly, gently caressing every inch. His kisses along my neck intensify as he nips and sucks at my skin. I clench my thighs together, praying his hands will move lower to satisfy the ache of longing.
“Baby girl, tell me something, anything, to take my mind off of all the things I want to do to you.” A moan escapes his lips as he pulls me against him. His warm breath ghosts over the sensitive place on my neck, making me shiver. Desire floods my center.
“What if I want you to do everything to me?” I offer.
He groans and pushes his hips against me, showing me how much he wants to give in. I want him to give in. I push my own hips back, increasing the pressure against his hardened cock. “I promised Tyler that I, we, would wait for our wedding ceremony.”
I rest my head back against his chest. My need starts to fade. “Where is he? I need to find him,” I breathe.
He spins me around to face him and lifts my chin, so he can look into my eyes. Dark blue eyes search my own. “He’s in an old, abandoned warehouse in the darkest part of the city. Find Liam and tell him where he is. He will know where to go.”
“They took Anders.”
Toby nods. “They brought him to the warehouse. He’s badly injured, but he’s still alive.”
“Why are they not fighting back? Why isn’t Tyler using his magic to transport out of there?”
“They’re using the same drugs they gave you.
Tyler… I’m no longer in Tyler’s body. He can’t hear me, and my magic no longer exists without a physical body to wield it.
I’ve been lingering in the shadows, watching and listening.
I don’t know how much time I have. The pull to return to wherever souls like me go gets stronger as more time passes. ”
I clasp my hands over my mouth. “This is all because of me,” I cry.
He pulls my hand away and cups my face. “No, baby girl. This was their plan before they even knew you existed. I’m partly to blame for everything that is taking place now.”
“What do you mean?”
“There’s no time to explain it all. Can you trust me to fix it?”
“I trust you.”
He crashes his lips into mine and desperately slides his tongue against mine.
He pulls my body flush against his own and kisses the top of my head.
“I love you. Tyler loves you. Remember all the good times. Remember how much he loves you and will always be there to protect you. Can you do that for me, please?”
My brows pull together. “What aren’t you telling me, Toby?”
He rests his forehead against my own. “He won’t be the same person you fell in love with, not after this. I promise you. We will find a way back to you. I’ll make this right. Just remember what I told you.” He shakes his head as some invisible force pulls him away from me.
“Toby!” I scream. I try to run after him, but my feet sink into the muddy sand of the lake’s edge. “Toby!”
“Remember what I said. Find them before it’s too late!” he yells. The screaming shadows of souls past swallow his body.
“Toby!”
“G! G!”
I jolt upright. “Toby, no! Don’t take him. Please, don’t take him!” I wail.
“G, wake up! You’re having a nightmare.”
My eyes open, and I thrash about. I’m being shaken.
“G!”
I blink hard, shaking the dream from my head. I rub my eyes and slowly take in my surroundings. A myriad of furrowed brows and concerned faces stare at me. I breathe hard. Odyssey rests his hand on my shoulder. I’m in my dorm room.
“Who the hell is Toby, and why does he look like half of his body is burned to a crisp in your dreams?”
My mouth is dry, and my throat closes up. I rub the front of my throat. Was Toby taken to the afterlife? Is he gone forever?
“G?”
“Toby is Shadow’s dead brother,” Emily explains from somewhere in my room.
“Okay… That explains why you’re worried about him being taken to the afterlife,” Odyssey slowly says.
“Why were you dreaming about him?” Alexis asks.
I search the room, looking for Liam. He stands by the door with a pinched expression on his face. His diamond earring reflects the light of the sun when he moves his head. I need to talk to him, like Toby asked. He sees me staring at him and backs away from the door to leave.
Odyssey moves off the bed, giving me space.
I push my way through the recruits.
“G!”
I pause to look over my shoulder.
“If you lose him, he’s going to his spot.”
I nod and rush out the door.
I find Liam exactly where Odyssey said he would be. Well, the second place I expected him to be. I went to the climbing wall first.
His legs are pulled tight against his chest, forearms resting on his knees. He stares off into the far distance, overlooking Territory Seven. This is where he brought me when we shared our first kiss, where he pointed to the white hill and told me about his imaginary castle.
“Why are you here?” he snaps.
“I need to tell you about my dream.”
A derisive laugh passes his lips. “Your dream? The one where you were yelling for some ghostly boyfriend? Did you kiss him, too?”
“That is not fair!” I shout.
He gets up and jumps off the boulder. “Fair? You want to talk to me about fair? I finally come home, and the first thing I see is you kissing one of the recruits. Then, on top of that, I get to watch firsthand security footage of you making out with Shadow all over the damn campus! And now you want to tell me about your makeout session with a ghost you just dreamed about. Go home, Jessica. Go tell one of the other recruits you make out with behind Shadow’s back. ”
A cold chill of fury runs up my spine. All I see is red. I cover the short space of distance and push him with all my might. “You don’t get to treat me like this!”
He recovers after stumbling back a couple of steps. I push him again, but he anticipates my shove and braces himself.
“You kissed me.”
I move to strike his abdomen. He blocks my attempt and swings around me, moving away from the ledge.
“You told me you loved me.”
I swing my body for a roundhouse kick, but he blocks me again.
“And then you left me. You don’t get to treat me like I did something wrong.” I fake a high kick and swing a punch, catching him in the jaw. “You… you ghosted me when I needed you.”
He backs away, so I set off in a hurried pace and knock him down. I straddle his chest and punch him in the face.
“I loved you from the moment I met you, and you left me without a word.” I pull my arm back to punch him again.
He swiftly sits up, grips my arms, and flips us over.
I raise my fisted left hand to throw a punch, and he catches it, gripping both wrists in his large hands and pinning them above my head.
His hands are hot, almost as hot as the fire he wields.
He’s breathing hard, and he squeezes his eyes shut.
“You knew I was leaving. You asked me to kiss you again before I left.”
“I needed you more than I wanted to admit. You broke my heart.” My voice cracks. Large drops of rain begin to fall over us.
He opens his eyes and tilts his face up to the sky, letting the rain wash over his face. When he looks down, his gray eyes are molten, heavy with emotion. “I broke my own fucking heart,” he croaks.
He crashes his lips onto mine, desperately coaxing my lips open with his tongue. Fiery heat spreads over my chest and sears my heart.
Even though the thoughts in the back of my brain tell me that this is so wrong, I part my lips and kiss him back. Electrical tingles race down my spine.
He releases the firm grip over my wrist and glides his hand down my body, searing my skin.
His body burns against mine. He parts my legs with his knees and presses his hardened cock against my core.
His hand slides under my shirt, pressing against the thin material covering my breast. He rubs against me, and the friction between our bodies elicits a deep moan. He releases my lips.
“Tell me that you’re still mine,” he whispers against my lips. He rubs soft circles around my nipple with his thumb. My head clouds from his kiss, his touch. “Tell me that you still love me, like I still love you.” He dives in for another kiss, consuming me and muddying the thoughts in my head.
A sound from behind us startles me back into awareness. A tingling sensation ripples up my scalp. He pulls back, his face hovering over mine.
What is wrong with me? I push against his chest with my free hand, and he retreats, resting his weight on his heels. I scramble to my feet. I close my eyes in guilt and shame and run back to the training facility.