56. Sleepover x2
FIFTY-SIX
Peter was right. The snow didn’t seem to stop falling for the next few days, and the temperatures dropped dramatically. Parker assured me he was prepared for this, but I wasn’t so sure. He hadn’t been in Iowa for winter in a long time. It was a different beast.
I’d been trying my best to keep writing the book and Parker was trying his best not to make me feel guilty, but the words just weren’t flowing—for that project at least. I’d filled another journal this week and finally was able to start using a gorgeous one I’d bought years ago because I loved the cover. It was an old habit from when I was younger that I picked back up when I found out I was pregnant.
My feelings used to overwhelm me, and if I didn’t write them down I’d explode. Some entries were scathing, especially the early ones when I was mad at Parker. Those would never see the light of day. I didn’t like writing negatively, but it was better to write them than say them. If I didn’t get them out in some way, they festered in my body.
Other entries were so full of love and light they made a bubbling feeling in my chest when I reread them. There had been a lot of those since Lily came into my life and lately with Parker.
The last week had been a gray area with a mix of high and low moments. When everything was great and happy, I forgot the limbo we were in and how it felt like we were on the precipice of greatness or self destruction.
I sat curled up on the couch with a blanket, journal, and a pen that wrote so smoothly it had me wanting to make up new words just to move it along the paper. The guys yelled at the TV every now and then when their friend didn’t make the touchdown. I didn’t remember his name from the dinner because he said he was a football player and I stopped listening. Brett was kicked back a few feet over on the couch, and Peter took the recliner while Parker was playing with Lily and only half watching the game. He was so sweet with her and gave her his full attention. He was working hard for the giggles that shook her tiny body, “hiding” behind her toy and then popping out to surprise her.
“Whatcha writing?” Brett asked under his breath.
I looked away from the two people my life was beginning to form around.
“Not my book like I should be.”
“It’ll come to you. I finished your debut last night. You have talent, Delilah.”
My debut was a work of pure love for writing. I was still figuring out my voice and that of my characters. I hadn’t gone back and read it since, other than to make edits when my publisher bought the rights and wanted to polish it to align with their brand.
“That means a lot, thanks.” I glanced up to meet his eyes and quickly looked away. I wasn’t overly modest, but I wasn’t used to people in my personal life reading my books.
“He wants you to write it, you know? He’s prepared to handle whatever fallout comes.”
“He shouldn’t have to be.” I pushed my journal off to the edge of the wide arm rest and burrowed my arms under my blanket. “I never planned on this, the success or this.” I gestured to the house, to him, to Lily. “I thought I’d make a few sales from my books, maybe enough to be able to move out of my parents’ house. I didn’t know I’d have to choose between what I love and who I love.”
“Can you write a different book?”
“I don’t have anything to give them. I was halfway done with the original when Parker came home in the fall.”
“I’m sure you’ll think of something.” His smile was reassuring and confident. I returned the smile.
I fucking hoped he was right because I wasn’t about to ruin Parker’s career or take him away from his friends in Seattle over a book, no matter how much it could change my life. But I also wasn’t ready to give up and burn the bridge with my publishing company. They took a chance on me, and I wanted to show them it was a good decision.
The wind had been whistling through the windows, so I knew the storm was still raging outside even though the sky was dark and it was hard to see the snow falling.
Parker’s phone rang, and his eyes flashed to mine the second before he answered. My heart picked up at the thought of it being something to do with my books or his team.
“Hey Lottie, what’s up?”
My shoulders sagged in relief that it was only my sister.
“Oh yeah, I’ll be right there. Just sit tight.”
He pocketed his phone and handed Lily off to me before grabbing his coat from the rack by the door.
“Lottie’s power is out and her generator won’t kick on.”
“Raf isn’t home?”
“No, and she can’t get him to answer his phone.”
Fucking figured. “How long has it been out?”
“A couple hours,” he gritted out while slipping his boots on.
My sister was so fucking stubborn and hated asking for help. She must have been having an awful time to have given in and called Parker.
“Can I come with you? She probably needs help with the boys.”
“No, you and Lily are staying here. I don’t want you out in this. She said her car is buried in snow, so I’m taking the truck. Peter, let’s go.”
They were out the door without another word and then Brett and I were left with a confused Lily watching us.
“Well, what should we do now?” Brett reached over to tickle her belly.
I did some quick mental math, trying to figure out where everyone was going to sleep. It was only five, but surely they’d be tired and hungry. The boys could always eat, so could my sister. Six bedrooms meant we had room for everyone. Lottie could take the daybed in my library. I’d fallen asleep there multiple times. It was comfy.
“Let’s make some supper. It won’t be ready right when they get here, but it’ll be worth the wait.”