Chapter Twenty-Two
Twenty-Two
Elsie
After giving myself an hour-long peptalk this morning about not thinking about Forge and miss being around him, he was now blowing my good intentions to smithereens.
It was very hard not to feel all fluttery and tingly when the swim trunks he wore hung low on his hips and he was shirtless.
When I looked at him, it was hard to breathe.
Whew. Good Lord, I had almost forgotten what his bare chest looked like. My memory hadn’t given it justice.
The image now had its own personal room in my brain. A showcase of sorts. To replay over and over.
I’d yet to follow him into the water.
“It’s not cold,” he told me with a crooked grin. “Heated, remember?”
I wasn’t worried about the temperature of the water.
I’d just been distracted by the sight of him since he’d emerged from the house, wearing nothing but shorts.
I’d read books that described a guy’s walk as a swagger, but I’d never witnessed one until today.
If anyone had a swagger, it would be Forge Savelle.
I nodded and took the hem of my cover-up to pull it over my head and drop it on the lounge chair, where I had been spreading out a fluffy, large towel before he arrived and scrambled my brain.
Deciding not to make eye contact with him as I walked over to the zero-entry end of the pool, for fear I’d stumble and embarrass myself, I focused on putting one foot in front of the other.
The first lap of water that covered my feet was nice. It wasn’t hot, but it was like he’d said, warm. I wondered what the temperature had to be outside before they turned off the heat to the pool. As enjoyable as this was now, it wouldn’t be when you needed to cool down.
“You bite that bottom lip any harder, and it’s gonna bleed,” Forge drawled, causing my head to snap up and look at him.
His hair was wet now and slicked back. Droplets of water clung to his eyelashes, making them spiky. Here I had thought, he couldn’t be more gorgeous, and he proved me wrong.
I released my lip from my teeth’s grip. I hadn’t even realized I had been doing it.
“I think I was prepping for colder water,” I explained, although that wasn’t it at all.
“We need to work on your trust with me,” he said. “I’m the most fucking honest guy you’ll ever meet.”
I grinned. Sure he was. That cocky smile he was flashing me told me he was lying now.
“I bet,” I replied as I eased down deeper into the water.
“What? You don’t believe me?” He sounded insulted. “All right, fine. Let’s play a game. You ask me anything you want, and I will tell you the honest truth. No matter how brutal and possibly embarrassing it might be.”
I paused and cocked my head to the side as I studied him. He looked completely sincere. What the heck? This might be fun.
“Anything?” I asked to clarify, not sure what I was going to ask him.
He nodded, holding out both his arms wide. “I am an open book. Go for it. Try me.”
I moved farther into the water until it was up to my waist before stopping a few feet away from him.
“How old were you when you got your first kiss?” I asked, deciding to start off light.
“Nine,” he replied.
I narrowed my eyes. “Not a peck on the playground.”
The corner of his lips quirked. “She was two years older than me, but I lied about my age. It was all tongue.”
“Seriously? Nine?” I asked.
He nodded. “Yep.”
“First girlfriend?” I asked.
He shook his head. “I don’t do those.”
“You don’t do girlfriends?”
“I do not.”
“Ever?” I asked, finding it hard to believe he’d never had one single committed relationship.
“Never. Not for me.”
Oh. That information deflated me, which was silly. But it did. Okay, time to press on.
“Your virginity?” My face felt warm after asking it. Why had I done that?
“Twelve,” he replied, amusement glistening in his eyes.
“You’re lying.”
He shook his head. “She was sixteen. Again, I lied about my age. I was tall.”
My jaw dropped. “That’s … that’s terrible.”
He chuckled. “Yeah, it was. I exploded the second the head of my condom-covered dick touched her cunt. Luckily, at that age, you get hard again almost instantly, and I was able to get it in after. Few moments of humiliation.”
A giggle burst out of me, and I covered my mouth.
“Go ahead. Laugh. I also emptied my load again once I was inside her before I even got a good pump in.”
My shoulders shook as I continued to laugh.
“Best three seconds of my young life,” he said with a shrug.
“Ohmigod,” I breathed and composed myself. “Where were you at that you could … could have sex with someone at that age?”
He raised an eyebrow. “Come on, Pickles. You gotta know my life wasn’t normal, growing up. I didn’t have a typical childhood.”
The Mafia. Right.
I hesitated, then decided to ask something that I’d thought about more than once.
“Have you …” I paused, not sure I wanted to end the mood with this one.
“Have I what?” he asked when I didn’t continue.
“Um, have, uh …” I should ask something else. But I was flustered now.
“Killed someone?”
I stilled. How had he known? I nodded.
“Yes.”
Okay, I’d guessed that. Maybe. No, I didn’t think I’d actually thought Forge had killed anyone. Oz possibly. But then I’d told myself it was ridiculous.
“Oh,” I replied. “I … more than once?” Why didn’t I let this go?
“Yes.”
Oh God. This was getting worse.
“On purpose?”
“Yes.”
I blew out a breath. I should stop now. Wrapping my arms around my waist, I suddenly got a chill, but it wasn’t from the water. It was deeper than that.
“There is a dark side to this world,” he told me. “But I’ve never killed an innocent man.”
So, he just killed bad men? Like that show I’d watched with Calvin … I forgot the name of it. Was he mentally disturbed, like that guy had been? I didn’t feel in danger with him. It was the opposite.
“Why?” I asked.
He shrugged. “Different reasons. But they all deserved it. The world is better off without them in it.”
He wasn’t God. He didn’t get to just decide who lived and died. I took a step back without thinking.
He watched me, then licked his lips. “Pickles …”
The way he said the nickname he called me sent a shiver over me, but it wasn’t a bad one. It should be, considering what he’d just admitted. But it wasn’t. I was a very stupid girl.
“You wanted the truth. I swore I’d give it to you. I don’t lie,” he told me, then took a step in my direction, causing the water to move around him. “I’d kill the bastards who killed your parents if I could find them.”
I sucked in a breath and held it.
“I’d make them suffer for the shadows and sadness I see in your eyes when you think no one is looking.” He stopped inches from me. I hadn’t moved. “I was raised not to let the law handle it. We handle it. It’s how it’s always been done. Their ways are often broken and not sufficient. Ours are.”
Breathe. I had to breathe. I did so slowly as my heart raced in my chest from his nearness.
“You’re here because Calvin knew our method of protecting you was the only one that would be successful.”
His gaze dropped to my lips, and I was once again not inhaling oxygen.
“The only thing that you’re in danger of here is me touching you.” His tone was husky.
I jerked when the palm of his hand touched my bare side, but I didn’t move away from it. I stared at his face as his eyes traveled down my body, stopping at my chest.
“You’re grieving,” he said in a thick voice that sounded pained.
“Your life has been ripped apart. I’m many things, but I won’t take advantage of that.
” His eyes snapped back up to meet mine.
“But I think about it.” He swallowed hard.
“I think about things I want to do to you, how much I want to show you just how good my cock feels, stretching you as I fill you.”
Oh my God. I was panting. I could hear it.
“I want to hear how you cry out when I take one of your nipples into my mouth and bite down on it,” he told me as he ran a finger over the edge of my bikini top.
Causing me to tremble as he dipped it inside my cleavage.
“But I won’t. It’s not what you need. You need a friend, and that’s what I’ll be.
” He leaned closer to my ear. “Unlike Calvin, I’ll be honest about it though.
How much I want your body. How my cock aches when I think about it. ”
My eyes drifted closed as I took in an unsteady breath.
“We’ll be friends,” he said, then pressed a kiss to my cheek. “Good friends. Because I need you too. We’re both grieving. And fucking wouldn’t help us with that.”
I felt him start to move away, and my eyes flew open. I wasn’t ready for him to do that. The rush of pleasure from having him this close didn’t need to end yet.
He slid his finger from between my breasts, then over to my pebbled nipple, which was poking against the material of my bikini top.
“I just need to see one thing. Then I’ll stop. We can swim, lie out in the sun, enjoy our day as friends. You can even ask me more questions,” he said.
“Wh-what?” I stammered, ready to agree to anything.
“I need an accurate visual of your tits. It’s only fair. You’ve seen me naked. Just give me one peek.”
I nodded. Just like that. Never in my life had I been asked something so bold. Yet here this man was, doing it, and I was agreeing.
A low, pleased growl came from his chest. “Turn your back toward the house,” he directed and moved me himself as he gripped my waist. “No one else is getting a look at them.”
Someone else was out here? I started to spin around to see, but his hold on me prohibited it.
“It’s just us. But there are cameras everywhere. I just know where they are.”
Oh. The blast of cool breeze on my nipple caught me by surprise, and I looked down to see my right breast bared as his fingers tugged the other cup from my left breast.
“Fuuuck,” he groaned. “Prettiest damn tits I’ve ever seen. Figures.”
His large, tanned hands palmed both of them, holding their weight. They were more than a handful, even for him. My eyes flicked up to see his face. He was focused on what he was doing. I gasped as his thumbs ran back and forth over the sensitive tips.
“Dammit,” he muttered.
Then the fabric was once again covering me, and his hands were gone.
He stepped back as the corner of his mouth curled up. “Gotta stop there … buddy,” he said, then blew out a ragged-sounding breath.
He wasn’t the first guy to touch me there. But he was the first one whose touch still tingled after his hands were gone. As if he had branded my skin.
“It’s time we go back to those questions,” he told me. “I need a distraction.”
Reluctantly, I nodded. I’d rather he do what he had done again.
Make my body hum in a way I’d not known was possible.
But he had said we were to be friends. And he didn’t do relationships.
I wasn’t the kind of girl who had sex with a guy I wasn’t in a relationship with.
I knew all that, yet still, I wanted to experience it all with him.
“Gotta stop looking at me like that, Pickles,” he warned. “I’ll end up taking the edge off right here so you can watch.”
What did he mean by that? I could ask. He’d tell me the truth. But I wasn’t sure I could survive the answer.
I tore my gaze from him and stared back at the lounge chairs. I searched for a question to snap me out of this sexual haze he’d put me under. Anything to neutralize this, us. But the question wanted answered, and it was right on the tip of my tongue when Winslet’s voice put the temptation out.
“I didn’t know you were home today, Forge,” she said cheerily. “I’m glad you kept Elsie company while I rode out my nausea spell.”
“Nothing I enjoy more than entertaining a gorgeous female,” he replied. “You know that.”
Winslet chuckled and shook her head, then pointed at him. “Be careful around that one.”
A little too late for that.