10
The bigger the heart, the more it suffers.
Takeshi
The strangest and most unbearable feeling was being a stranger within one’s own body.
Takeshi had always prided himself on control.
It wasn’t a preference. It was necessary. When he unleashed his temper, blood spilled, and bodies dropped around him like storms he’d used to dream of as a lonely child.
He’d never felt rain wash over his skin.
But Takeshi wasn’t quite sure what to believe anymore.
He scraped his hands down his face, sitting on the small bed the Aces granted him.
He didn’t want to be motionless. Takeshi wanted to claw his brain out. He couldn’t handle something so useless dwelling inside him.
He recalled growing up in the dark city of Apollo. Working as a captain in Braderhelm. Watching prisoners and punishing those who stepped out of line. Sleep. Wake. Repeat.
And then…
Nothing.
The rest was a blank canvas, like trying to flip to a previous chapter of a book to find the pages torn out.
The last thing he remembered was waking up in Hermes and receiving orders from Doctor Strauss to destroy the Aces and bring their criminal leader, Jack, to justice.
Once Doctor Strauss gave him the order, Takeshi had an undeniable urge to follow it. To not even question the command.
But when that dangerously beautiful girl called his name outside the Aces’ hideout, something menacing stirred within him. Her voice was a violent gut punch that left him reeling, and his brain demanded he destroy her.
But Takeshi was unsuccessful, and his enemies captured him.
His first plan when he awoke was to kill them all and report back to Doctor Strauss.
Especially her.
The girl who sat across from him in the tiny cell and claimed to have known him in Braderhelm Prison.
He quickly dismissed it as a farce.
Takeshi would’ve remembered a girl like her.
She was a complete and utter stranger. Not to be trusted.
But for some inexplicable reason, his heart disagreed. It beat a battle drum in his chest. His muscles clenched and tightened, wanting to draw closer to her.
And when he stared into her eyes, a dark voice inside him bellowed.
But he ignored the strange echo and saw the insignificant girl for what she was—a tool and a pest to eradicate.
That’s what he kept repeating to himself in the cell.
Follow the mission. Be the soldier you were trained to be. Obey.
But ignoring her was like convincing his lungs to never inhale.
She was an enthralling creature. Her eyes were like stars he’d never witnessed. And the longer she spoke, the more Takeshi wanted to rip open her mind and memorize all her fears.
His enemies were clever in choosing her. She was a perfect distraction and handpicked to break him.
His only option was to crush her first.
But when he came up with an escape plan, a more nefarious idea took shape. He could take her with him. Tie her up. Make her his prisoner and extract every secret buried beneath those eyes.
But that opportunity never arrived. He was knocked unconscious and woke in a makeshift hospital bed, surrounded by doctors in white robes.
Lane was the only person who spoke in his presence. The others were too terrified. A smart reaction.
Lane quickly explained the surgery they’d performed to remove a chip implanted in his brain. He said the chip had given him false memories and was designed to control him.
Takeshi refused to believe the doctor.
But then, Lane showed him video footage of them extracting the chip.
Takeshi nearly killed every doctor in his vicinity.
Someone had implanted a device in him without permission?
The sheer violation made Takeshi roar and sent his heart rate skyrocketing to the point where Lane was forced to sedate him.
When he woke again, Lane sat by his side with a sorrowful look in his eyes. He said the only way his memories would return was with time and patience.
Two things Takeshi lacked.
His plans of blood and carnage waited for no one.
Whoever invaded his mind would pay so dearly, they’d regret ever looking upon him. Earth would bend at the weight of his retribution.
His thoughts drifted once more to the brown-haired girl with the infinitely sad eyes. Something burned in his chest whenever he looked upon her. But it somehow hurt worse when she wasn’t in his sight.
It was infuriating.
Those types of connections were nothing but a weakness. A vulnerability for his enemies to use against him. He wouldn’t allow that to happen.
So he made a plan to study her. To learn every single flaw she possessed. And when the perfect opportunity presented itself in the basement to sever the connection for good, Takeshi seized it.
The girl was never going to beat him, but to her credit, she knew how to fight. He recognized that fiery expression in her green eyes. The slow-burning rage that ignited his dead heart and made him want to fasten his lips on hers, just to see if she’d bite back.
But those dangerous thoughts only reminded Takeshi of his goal. To humiliate Khalani and convince her to never seek him out again.
But the girl refused and dared him to hurt her.
Takeshi had no idea why her words caused such a visceral reaction in him. The thought of injuring her was nearly crippling.
That’s why he snapped her shoulder. To prove to himself that he didn’t care.
But when she looked at him afterward…
He’d never seen such torment and betrayal reflected in a single pair of eyes. The dark voice inside him raged to cut off his own arm for hurting her.
Electricity raced up his limbs as he clenched his fists.
Takeshi was slowly unraveling. He needed to fight. To kill.
To find all that he’d lost.
Takeshi gripped his head, pulling on the ends of his hair, desperate for the pain to distract him.
Get it together, he snarled.
Revenge wasn’t won by feeling sorry for yourself.
Victory was achieved at the end of a blade.
Takeshi lifted his gaze, staring at the dark stone wall as he formulated a plan. The only person he could fully trust was himself. That was the only truth he knew.
He had no idea if the Aces were lying to him. If his memories were real or fake. What Takeshi did know was that someone thought they could violate him without consequences.
They were sadly mistaken.
So he made a list.
A list of potential enemies. And everyone in Hermes was on it, including the girl, no matter what strange inner urges he felt toward her.
He would watch. Listen. Talk when needed. And figure out who was responsible for his torment.
Some names on the list would be crossed out.
Others would be added.
But God help whoever remained by the time he was through.
Takeshi’s eyes would be the last they witnessed before he descended into hell with them.