20
I think a part of me will always reach for you.
Khalani winced at every shift and thud of their scuffed boots against the golden sand. She used to love staring at the glittering moon, the lone object meant to mesmerize and swallow attention. But tonight, it may as well have been a bright beacon revealing their location to the Sinners.
She stared at the sparse clouds, silently praying for more to appear from the heavens and conceal them.
“You all right?” Ferren asked, sidling closer.
“I’m fine,” she replied automatically, willing the tremors in her hands to stop. “How much longer until we get there?”
They’d left hours ago, and the sun had long disappeared beyond the horizon. Khalani rubbed her hands down the long-sleeve black cardigan they’d loaned her as the night enveloped them in a cold embrace.
“We won’t reach the city until daybreak,” Ferren replied. “Make sure you don’t fall behind.”
When she nodded, he passed her and joined the others up front, whispering to a man with short-cropped brown hair. The man peered off into the distance with a pensive expression, giving a quick shake of his head as Ferren sighed in relief.
Her legs were beginning to cramp as they continued marching in silence. Walking with heavy boots across the sinking sand felt like trudging through mud. But Ferren and the other warriors kept their brisk, punishing pace, like navigating through the Death-Zone was second nature.
Behind her, she felt Brock’s annoyed glare digging into her back. She didn’t know if it was from having to watch her struggle to keep up, or the gall at being coerced to join their little escapade.
Probably both and a few other reasons she wasn’t privy to.
Takeshi walked a couple of arm’s lengths away. He didn’t appear winded at all. His stamina was unmatched, but even though he could easily set a backbreaking pace at the front, he kept her in his line of sight.
Khalani tried not to let the aggravation seep in. Tried not to dwell on the reasons why he came. Reading into Takeshi’s motives was as fruitful as waiting for the desert to turn into the sea.
But her mind kept returning to one thing. He didn’t volunteer to join the raid until she did.
Was that the buried parts of him still fighting to protect her?
Did he know the person who would sacrifice just as much was standing right next to him?
“Look your fill yet, Kanes?”
Khalani startled when Takeshi shifted his foreboding gaze to her.
“I…I wasn’t looking at you.”
“Sure, you weren’t.”
“I was getting a feel for the landscape,” she lied.
“Ah, yes. The ever-changing landscape,” he said dryly. “Do you think the sand on that ridge feels different from the kind beneath your feet?”
“Not sure. How about you walk a mile that way and let me know?”
One of the female warriors up ahead shot Khalani a mean look, warning her that she’d spoken too loudly. She grumbled under her breath, trying not to focus on the grains of sand slipping into her socks.
“You’re nervous,” Takeshi commented, edging closer. Her first instinct was to lash out, but something told her that was exactly what he wanted.
She refused to answer.
“Did something happen on the road?” he prodded. “Something in your version of memories?”
Again, no matter how much he got under her skin, she was going to keep her mouth shut.
His sharp features twisted into a deeper frown. “If you think ignoring me will make me believe you faster, it won’t.”
She wouldn’t dream of it.
Khalani shoved her hands in her pockets, stubbornly keeping her gaze fixed ahead. Takeshi exhaled an angry breath.
Odd. He usually preferred her silence.
They walked quietly for another five minutes before he spoke again.
“Why did you come?”
The question threw her. “What do you mean?”
“Most people run from their fears. But you keep charging toward them. Why?” Something in his velvety voice felt more intimate in the dark.
“What makes you think I’m afraid?”
He gave her a knowing look, like she was an open book splayed out just for him. And she had to force herself to glance away before doing something stupid.
Like kiss him.
“Are you nervous?” She directed the question back, trying to steer the subject away from her.
“No.”
“Does anything scare you?”
“A few things,” he said.
“What?” She looked at him.
“Like I’d tell you.”
“I can keep a secret.”
“Good for you.”
“Fine,” she huffed. “Just tell me your reasons for coming.”
“I thought it obvious.”
“To protect me?” The hopeful words escaped her before she could swallow them back.
“Now why would you think that?” He tilted his head, his deep voice sending a chill up her spine.
But he didn’t deny it either.
“You tell me.”
“Nice try.” He shook his head, strands of black hair falling across his forehead. “You explain first. Maybe I’ll give you the truth after.”
Khalani sighed, staring ahead at the vast desert. “It’s not that complicated. Desert Spring needed help.”
“There were others in the group who could’ve stepped up.”
“I’d rather risk myself than anyone else.”
“Why?”
“Because I love them.” She clenched her fingers tighter around the straps of her backpack.
“Your love for them outweighs yourself?” he asked, his expression puzzled.
“Isn’t that the only way to love someone?”
Khalani crossed her arms as the weighted silence extended, fearing she’d revealed too much to him.
That of all the weaknesses she possessed, he was her greatest.
Not because of the damage he could do to her.
But for all the ways she would break for him.
“You asked me why I came,” he said at last. “I wanted to keep an eye on you.”
“Thought so.” She heaved a deep sigh, her shoulders sagging. “I’m your enemy, and you can’t trust me, blah blah.”
The corner of his lip quirked up. “True,” he whispered, a dangerous gleam entering his eyes as he leaned in. “But I’m not through with you yet. So if you can’t be trusted to watch your back, someone else has to.”
Her breath caught at the subtle warning.
Takeshi didn’t say another word or give her a chance to respond. He just walked away, leaving her mouth dangling open.
* * *
Ferren raised a finger to his lips as the seven of them crouched behind a crumbled building.
Khalani held her gun tight, pointing to the sandy ground as she scanned the deserted area.
The sun had started its ascent, casting minimal light over them. The smell of grit and dust was heavy in the air as they waited at the edge of a small, abandoned town.
“The store is at the end of the street,” Ferren whispered, his shoulders stiff. “Stay close to the buildings. Ready?”
They nodded, tension pouring off them. Especially Takeshi.
A burning fire lit beneath his gaze as he gripped the handgun like it was an extension of himself.
Adrenaline seeped through her veins as they moved around the weathered structures. The town had a main street, but unlike Desert Spring, no grass decorated the dusty road. No laughing children danced between the buildings.
All sense of peace and comfort had long vanished.
For a split second, a vision entered her mind. Hundreds of people milled about the street, celebrating as colorful balls of fire exploded in the sky. Her lips parted in awe, but just as quickly as the scene came, it disappeared, revealing a barren wasteland of ruined buildings.
Her steps faltered, and she felt Takeshi behind her.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
She shook her head. “Nothing.”
The heat and dehydration were clearly taking their toll.
His probing gaze narrowed, but he didn’t say anything else as Khalani caught up to Brock. The musty scent of old brick filled her lungs as Ferren led them onward.
They stayed on the right-hand side of the town, close to the broken windows of each building. The place looked eerily similar to a picture she’d seen in a history book of an old Western city.
A flicker of movement appeared to her left. Khalani instinctively raised her gun, but it was only tumbleweed blowing past. She slowly lowered her weapon, her erratic pulse pounding in her ears.
No cars lined the streets of the vacant town. When she peered through one of the broken windows, no furniture remained in the buildings. Everything was completely cleared out.
As if people had abandoned this place for a reason.
Khalani silently willed Ferren to move faster.
She wasn’t the only one.
The other three warriors stiffened with each scrape of their boots along the sand and lifted their guns every time the wind howled, warning them to leave.
But they pressed forward, ignoring the eerie feeling that commanded their muscles to run.
Even Takeshi, who usually maintained a wide berth, planted himself inches from her back. They finally reached the target building, which was larger than all the rest. Pillars dotted the wooden porch, and a yellow sign hung inside the window.
HILLS GENERAL STORE: CLOSED
INTRUDERS WILL BE SHOT ON SIGHT!
She gulped, but Ferren waved his hand in dismissal.
“That sign is hundreds of years old. Our scouts think there may be canned food in the back safe. You two keep guard out front. The rest, come with me.” Ferren directed Khalani and Takeshi to stay outside.
The other warriors eagerly followed him indoors. Brock was the only one who hesitated, but Takeshi gave him a firm nod.
Khalani’s muscles coiled as the dilapidated door closed behind Brock with a loud creak, barely hanging onto its hinges.
She glanced at Takeshi, who looked nothing like the soft-hearted man who’d held her in the prison camp.
The terrifying Captain who’d ripped the Governor’s head off stood beside her.
His shrewd gaze swept the road and abandoned buildings with cold precision. He subtly shifted his body, tightening his grip around the gun as he positioned himself between her and the main street.
“What’s wrong?” she whispered.
“Something doesn’t feel right.”
Violence stirred beneath his steady voice.
She silently raised her weapon beside him.
Other than a few loud thuds from inside the building, everything was still. The sun continued to rise, gradually exposing their position.
Khalani turned toward the door.
What was taking so long?
She tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear when a glint of light streaked across her face. She squinted as another flicker hit her eyes.
“Takeshi,” she warned.
He turned, raising his gun as another beam of light flashed.
“Stay here,” he commanded in a low voice, stepping forward, but he halted.
A small figure appeared across the street, stepping out from the dark alley. Khalani’s heart sputtered in her chest, unable to believe what she was seeing.
It was a child.
The little boy couldn’t have been more than seven. He was barefoot, wearing a filthy beige sackcloth, so skinny that his bones looked like they were about to leap from his skin. His ragged blond hair extended to his shoulders, and his dirt-stained face stared at them with a somber expression.
The little boy slowly opened his mouth.
They were too far to hear, but it looked like he was mouthing a single word.
“Help.”
Khalani lurched forward, the strongest instinct physically tugging her toward the child. But Takeshi immediately shot out his hand, stopping her.
He gave a quick shake of his head, staring at the child who was now crying. The skinny boy took a hesitant step toward them, but an unknown figure yanked him back into the alley.
Agonizing wails rippled through the air.
“Oh my god,” she rasped, bolting around Takeshi. She made it to the middle of the road before he practically picked her up, depositing her body behind him with little effort.
“Go inside,” he growled, aiming his gun directly toward the alley. He was still staring ahead when another flicker of movement grabbed her attention.
She turned just as someone aimed a gun at Takeshi.
She didn’t have time to lift her own weapon and fire back.
All Khalani could do was scream, “Look out!” before she slammed into Takeshi, knocking him aside. She felt something slam into her neck before she collapsed to the ground.
Khalani blinked at the bright blue sky, her back on the sand.
She instinctively touched the back of her neck, expecting the warm stickiness of blood, but instead, she felt something thick and sharp protruding from her skin.
Takeshi’s stricken face appeared above her.
His expression contorted with horror as he pulled out a thick dart.
“Get the fuck up, Kanes.” His voice cracked as he cast the dart aside, urging her to stand.
She opened her mouth, but no sound came out.
With every millisecond that passed, Khalani’s limbs grew heavier and heavier. Her breaths slowed as the earth continued dragging her into its depths—welcoming her home.
It was nice.
To fall into an endless sleep with something so beautiful staring back.
I could die this way, she thought as a tear formed in her eyes.
“GET UP, KANES!”
I can’t.
His gaze tracked the tear that swept past her cheek, and his expression shifted.
Black fury swallowed his vision, and Takeshi slowly lifted his head. She could do nothing but watch as his deep-seated rage took over.
He raised his gun and opened fire.
People screamed, and more shots cracked through the air.
A dart hit his chest.
Takeshi flinched but kept shooting, like a powerful storm had seized him, ready to punish the world.
Another tear tracked down her face as multiple darts struck him in retribution.
Khalani struggled to bring her lips together to spill a desperate plea.
Go. Leave me.
But all that came out of her mouth was a low moan.
Takeshi knelt over her, protecting her body with his own, refusing to leave her side as he continued to fire furiously. Another flurry of darts smacked into him, and his knee bottomed out, planting him to the sand.
GO!
He didn’t hear the silent scream that tore through her.
And Khalani lay helpless as Takeshi’s large body swayed and fell. His cheek hit the ground beside her, his wide gaze locking with hers, neither of them able to speak or save each other.
With Herculean effort, he slowly moved his hand across the sand until his fingertips grazed hers.
Shouts erupted in the distance, but the sounds were muffled, like she was drowning underwater. Her focus centered on Takeshi’s fingers that touched hers, grounding her.
That small connection kept her breathing.
But a bag was suddenly yanked over her head.
And everything went black.