Chapter Forty-One
That afternoon, when Owen left to speak with Charles, I went to Freya’s cottage, looking for Shae, but she was no longer in the kitchen.
I quickly bypassed Jace and an officer who were engaged in a heated conversation about ballistic missiles; I’d had enough of military personnel and battle strategy for one day.
I found Shae in her room upstairs. Packing.
“Oh, Shae. Have you decided?” I asked from the doorway, and she turned at my voice, hastily wiping her cheeks. I rushed to her and gathered her into my arms.
“I was about to find you so I could tell you. It’s too much, Kira.
To sit there beside him. He doesn’t see me.
Doesn’t want anything more from me than flirting.
For the first time in my life, I want serious.
Especially with what we’re facing, I can’t pretend to be a person who is happy all the time. ”
“I understand,” I said, pulling back to look at her. “But he cares. A lot. I’ve seen how he looks at you. I think he’s just scared.”
She snorted in disbelief. “Let’s try something. Give me a few minutes’ head start, then tell him I’m leaving and watch him just sit there. He won’t come, Kira. I bet you anything.”
“You’re wrong, but let’s see what happens.”
Shae nodded and resumed packing. None of us had much, so she finished in a few minutes.
“I’ll return to fight in the final battle,” she said. “I just need some time away from here. Away from him.”
I nodded, tears rolling down my cheeks. “Shae, your friendship has meant the world to me. I know it’s been tough, but the times we’ve shared, the laughs…
I’ve always wanted a best friend like you.
You’re amazing. Don’t ever forget that. And Shae, I’m not holding you to anything.
If you don’t come back to fight, I’ll understand. Do what you need to do.”
Her eyes welled up with tears of relief. We hugged one last time before she slipped quietly from the cottage. From the window, I watched her cross the garden before I rushed down to Freya’s kitchen. The meeting seemed to be over; most people had left.
“Jace! Shae’s leaving!”
Jace’s head whipped up, and he stood quickly. Panic flashed in his eyes a split second before resignation took its place, and he sat back down.
My jaw dropped. Shae had been right.
“Jace! Did you hear me? She’s leaving. Right now. Aren’t you going to follow her?”
“It’s for the best, Kira. She deserves better, and we both know it.” He turned back to the officer.
What. The. Hell.
“What are you saying, Jace?” There was a hollow ache in my stomach.
Shae couldn’t be leaving. When I had said goodbye to her, I had honestly thought that in a few minutes Jace would be chasing her down, professing his love, like a knight in shining armour from tales of old.
Shae couldn’t go. She was a part of the team.
“In case you haven’t noticed, we’re in the middle of a briefing. Why don’t you take your girly matters elsewhere?” Hargraves’s sneer and condescending attitude had me narrowing my eyes. He was most likely still sore from being shown up earlier.
“Shut up, Hargraves,” I snapped. “You’re fired anyway.”
“You can’t say that to me!” he shouted, his eyes bulging with indignation, beer sloshing from the stein as he gestured at me. I groaned. Who had given him another drink? “The disrespect! It won’t be tolerated! Who do you think you are?”
He raised his hand as if to strike me, his eyes glassy and unfocused, but he never made contact. One minute he stood beside me, his hand swinging toward my face; the next, he crashed into a wall, his feet dangling an inch off the ground.
He didn’t struggle for breath, like Sylvia had in the park, and I hadn’t entered his mind like I had with Todd. Hargraves was merely in a tight hold, pinned to the wall where he couldn’t hurt anyone, his eyes wide with disbelief.
And although I was angry at Jace for not running after Shae and I was mad at Hargraves for being, well, Hargraves, my power hadn’t stemmed from rage or the darkness in my blood.
I hadn’t even closed my eyes first or steadied my breathing.
I had simply acted on instinct, drawing on the power of nature, and fused my Druid magic with my ability to control another person.
Even more surprising, I retained control of Craos’s magic, using it as I wanted while keeping it from taking over my body.
Silence filled the room. Jace, who had half risen from his chair when he saw Hargraves poised to strike me, seemed suspended in a state of shock, although the few other remaining officers seemed even more floored.
Freya and Shamus, however, looked at me with proud smiles, like they had always known this day would come.
But I had no time to consider my power, because my two best friends were about to make the worst mistakes of their lives.
“You listen to me, Jace Amari—” I pinned him with a hard stare. “—Shae is leaving, and I know you care for her because I know you, and I see how you look at her. And those feelings might scare you—”
Jace sat with a heavy sigh. “Kira, you don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re my friend, but can you please stay out of this one? Letting Shae go is the best thing I can do for her.”
“Why? Help me understand. I know this is none of my business, but I can’t help myself.
I took a risk with Owen. Remember that day at the museum?
You helped me see how wrong I was to run from him, and opening myself up to him has been the best decision I’ve ever made.
What’s stopping you from finding love with Shae?
” I paused as a thought occurred to me. “Unless you don’t have feelings for her? ” Perhaps I’d misread the situation.
“I do,” he conceded, his voice tormented. “More than I ever thought possible.”
“Then that’s all you need. Go to her!”
“It’s not all I need!” He sprang up again, his chair loudly scraping the wooden floor.
I saw the moment he remembered we weren’t alone, and he began to shut down, but I wouldn’t let him off so easily.
“What, Jace?” My voice rose with each word. “What else do you need? What are you so afraid of?!”
“I can’t protect her!” he yelled, his eyes burning into mine.
“There’s a fucking demon from another world coming for us, and I can’t protect her!
At night, I close my eyes, and all I see is Shae struggling in the car, and I can’t help her.
Shae, lying bloody on the riverbank, unmoving, and I can’t wake her.
I can’t even fucking move toward her! I’m completely helpless.
You have power, Kira! You can defend yourself and those you love.
I couldn’t do anything. Anything! I was fucking useless then and I’m fucking useless now.
And terrified of seeing Shae hurt and being unable to do anything about it.
Again. So, yes, I’m letting her go. I don’t want her anywhere near this battle. ”
My heart ached for him. He was right. He was also so very, very wrong.
I leaned my hands on the table and locked my gaze with his, trying to glare some sense into him.
“You are not fucking useless. Not then and not now. You’re Jace Amari.
You’re smart and funny and one of my best friends.
You’re a brother to Owen and he’d be lost without you.
You’re loyal and brave and you went through hell on that riverbank.
We all did, including Shae. She needs you, Jace, and you need her.
You both need to talk about what happened that night and be there for each other.
You were paralyzed on the riverbank. Unable to move or act.
But you can move now, and if you choose not to act, if you let Shae walk away, you will regret it for the rest of your life.
No matter how long that is. And no matter how this battle ends, Craos will have already won. ”
He stared at me for a long moment, his chest heaving, his fists clenched so hard his knuckles were white.
Then the truth of what I’d said hit him, and he ran from the kitchen.
I unpinned Hargraves without a second glance—although I felt gratified by the thump of him hitting the floor—and raced from the kitchen, hot on Jace’s heels.
He sprinted through the garden, and I fell behind, unable to keep up with his long legs, while worries about what could happen whirled through my mind.
What if Shae had already gone? What if Jace was too late?
He would just have to chase her down in the outside world, I decided.
But would his hesitation to follow Shae hurt her?
If she made it to the outside world, she would know he had been willing to let her go.
My heart pounded at the pain my friends must feel.
We took the bend in the path leading to the meadow with the Yew, and I breathed a sigh of relief when I spotted her standing in the tree’s doorway.
Her back was to us, one hand clutching her bag while her other rested against the tree’s trunk.
She straddled the threshold, one foot inside and one foot out.
The next few minutes would determine which direction she chose.
“Shae!” Jace shouted, and I wanted to shout, too, but I had done enough. It was up to them now, and all I could do was watch and hope.
“Shae, wait!” She turned, and I witnessed every emotion flash across her face—relief, pleasure, irritation. Anger.
“What took you so long, Jace?” she shouted, dropping her bag and charging toward him. “I’ve been standing in this damn tree for five minutes waiting for you to—”
Jace never let her finish. He reached her in a few long strides and hauled her against him just before his mouth crashed against hers, claiming it.
I almost swooned from the perfection of the scene.
It was straight from one of my romance novels, and I stood there like a happy idiot while I watched my two best friends find one another at last.