VELVETEEN vs. The Consequences of Her Actions #4
“Everything.” Jacqueline shook her head. “It cost her the world, and it cost me my world, and now everyone acts like this is where I’ve always been. Even Papa. He says I’ve always been his daughter, and I want to believe him, because it would be easier, but I can’t.”
“Wait.” Action Dude put up his hand. They both turned to face him. “Are you saying someone revised reality, and rewrote all our memories, because this Jackie person kept Vel from dying?”
“I never said she saved Velma’s life,” said Jacqueline.
“You didn’t have to,” said Action Dude. “I mean, we studied you in class, after it became clear that the holidays weren’t going to leave Vel alone.
You’re the charitable Spirit of the Season.
The kid who gives all her presents away, who skips lunch so her classmates can eat.
You don’t have a selfish bone in your body.
Now you’re telling me that you used to be this Jackie girl? ”
“No,” said Jacqueline. “I was never her. I could have been. I wasn’t. And I honestly don’t know if…if I was pulled out of my own reality and into hers, or if I’m her, rewritten. Either way, I don’t remember being her. I just know that I’m not supposed to be here.”
Action Dude looked from Jacqueline to Velveteen and back again before he said conversationally, “You know, I figured that when I ran away from home to join the fight, shit would get weird. I just didn’t think it would happen this fast.”
“It’s happened faster,” said Jacqueline. “Not often, but I mean, it’s possible.”
“You’re joining the fight?” asked Velveteen. There was a tremulous note of hope in her voice, something that would have sounded more natural coming from the girl she’d been back when she’d still believed the world was good, and that a boy named Aaron Frank would always be her hero. “Really?”
“You were always what it took to make him take a stand,” said Yelena. She sounded amused. She sounded tired. These two things were far from contradictory. They were conjoined, entwined like the brambles that surrounded the castle.
Velveteen turned. Yelena was standing on the edge of the castle wall, leaning against one of the gargoyles. She was still wearing the top of her black ball gown, but the skirt was gone, replaced by black leggings.
She smirked at Velveteen’s expression. “Can’t really fly quietly in six layers of satin. Torrey thinks it’s great—this isn’t her era, but at least people aren’t running around half-naked all the time. I think it’s a little confining.”
“When you spend your whole adult life in spandex, I guess it would be,” said Velveteen. “You going to attack me too?”
“Nah.” Yelena’s smirk melted into a weary smile. “I missed you too much for that. You scared the hell out of us, Velma. We didn’t think you were ever coming back. And then the spin machine started up, and by the time we realized what was happening, it was too late.”
“How long have you been standing there?” asked Jacqueline uneasily.
“Long enough to hear you say that this isn’t your world, and that you’re supposed to be some girl that none of us remembers, except for apparently Vel, who was there when she disappeared.
” Yelena shook her head. “You should talk to Torrey. She can tell you a few things about living in a world that’s not your own. I just wish you’d said something.”
“The world’s healed up around me. It’s patched the holes where Jackie should have been.
Like I told Vel, I honestly don’t know whether I was pulled here from another reflection, or whether I was her and got remade into me.
Either way, I know I shouldn’t be here because I’m being punished for her sins.
I just don’t know if it’s Aurora punishing Jackie by making her me, or the Snow Queen punishing me for not being her. ”
“I think this is giving me a headache,” said Action Dude.
“Welcome to the club,” said Yelena. She sounded faintly amused. “See, if you’d just broken your corporate programming sooner, you could have been over the initial culture shock by now, and have joined the rest of us in dull acceptance of the fact that this the way the world works now.”
“Brat,” said Action Dude.
“Privileged jerk,” said Yelena.
“Now it really feels like old home week,” said Velveteen. “Has the Princess calmed down?”
“She’s getting there,” said Yelena. “Torrey’s talking her back to normal.
She does fairy tale logic really, really well, when she needs to.
But it’s bad, Vel. You got that, right? The Princess is hanging on by a thread, and it’s not up to her.
Every time a child decides that she’s the bad guy, she shifts a little further from who she’s always been.
Once she passes a certain point, I don’t think she’s going to be able to come back. ”
“One friend gone, another going…” Velveteen glanced at Jacqueline. “Nobody told me this could be the cost of going to the Seasonal Lands.”
“Not even Santa can see the future,” said Jacqueline. “If he could, I like to think he would have tried harder to keep things from happening the way that they have.”
“All right.” Velveteen took a deep breath.
She was still so damn tired. The Seasonal Lands had all but used her up: she had nothing left to spare.
She needed a month of soft beds and hot showers and heavy meals, things that would put the meat back on her bones.
Somehow it was no surprise that she wasn’t going to get any of those things.
She never did, when she really needed them.
“We have to fix this. We’ve come too far, and we’ve fought too hard, for things to end this way. ”
“If you’ve got any suggestions, I’m ready to hear them,” said Yelena.
Velveteen looked at her, shrugged, and said calmly, “We need to go see Santa.”
None of them had an answer for that. Overhead, the fireworks continued to explode.