Chapter 28
Vega squeezed Arlet as hard as she could, shedding a few tears while they continued to hug each other and not let go. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I put you in her path. I never expected her—”
“Stop.” Arlet pulled away from their hug and stared into Vega’s tear-filled eyes. A floodgate had opened when they arrived at the caves and had a moment to themselves. Bridger was locked in a cell alone—officially a prisoner of the rebels. “It’s not your fault. I’m sorry I didn’t trust your plan.”
Khort nodded in agreement. “We should have trusted you. We let the fear of losing you blind us from what needed to happen. You were right. You did it.”
I did it. But at what cost?
There were no regrets trading her life for theirs… But a prickle of sadness spread through her veins like poison. An ache for the life she thought she could have if she fought hard enough.
The peace she’d hoped for would never come.
Vega had given that up the night she begged for her sister’s death and hadn’t even known it.
Soon, Vega would have to face the anger she knew would be waiting for her when she was alone—but not yet. She had plenty of time to be mad about her fate, now wasn’t the time to wallow in self pity.
“How?” Arlet asked, searching her best friend’s face like the answer was hidden under the smeared blood covering Vega’s skin.
Vega wiped at her tears, pulling her hands back to see the evidence of Romulus's death… and then she told them everything she could, skipping over anything hinting to what Vega had done, what she’d given up, or who might be the cause of it all.
“I got wrapped up in breaking the curse, in realizing how close I was to saving us. I got wrapped up in him, unable to fight the bond of our souls.” Vega took a breath, wiping at her nose.
“Gods, it happened so fast. It was like neither of us could tell our bodies no, and it didn’t matter how many times my brain reminded my heart what he’d done to me.
And now, fuck, now I can feel everything.
I can feel his breathing again. I can see where he is if I close my eyes.
He can talk to me… inside.” She stopped, watching them try to school their shock at her confession.
“I hate what he did to us, but I know there’s a side to his story we might never understand. ”
Khort made a noise sounding a lot like a strained laugh. “Vega, he left us to run the army of, let’s just call her what she is, our mortal enemy.”
Vega stayed calm. “Enemy or not, we know what Marlena is capable of—the abuse she’s capable of.
Two years is a long time to be subjected to any kind of torture.
Two years with Marlena?” She fought away the shudder creeping up her spine.
“You were let go after seventeen days. Imagine what over seven hundred more would have done to you.”
Khort narrowed his eyes. “Seventeen days, and then she killed my mom, only two years before the curse she put on my land would take my sister’s life.”
“She’s killed everyone, Khort. Every single person we love that can die is dead, and if they aren’t, they probably will be.
She’s left us with no one except each other.
I’m not looking to fight. I don’t want to fight with you two anymore.
We’re finally one step ahead of her. Finally.
After fifty-five years we get to say we’re ahead of her.
” Vega ran a hand through her battle worn hair, thankful for the wet cloth someone had brought her earlier to wipe her face clean.
“What did you do to her?” Arlet asked softly, keeping her voice low so no one else would hear.
Vega froze for a split second too long. Khort raised his brow, and Arlet crossed her arms.
Her friends knew her too well.
She couldn’t talk about it all yet, not when she didn’t understand the first thing about what she’d done. Part of her was still trying to convince herself it was all a lucid dream. But whenever she did, the darkness within surfaced, waiting to crawl its way up the pit the second Vega summoned it.
“I took Diana.” Vega couldn’t get around hiding everything, so she told them what she could.
Khort choked on the air he inhaled. “You what?”
Diana, the dead goddess of the hunt and wild animals. The goddess of Khort’s people.
“To kill Romulus, I had to bring him through the portal. It was where Death would be waiting to collect my soul at the end of my curse.” Vega could see that blackness again, the sinking feeling in her stomach returning like she was back inside.
“It didn’t matter that I'd brought Romulus in place of myself.” He didn’t want Romulus.
The echo of a snarl vibrated up the dark pit inside her mind.
Vega couldn’t gaslight herself hard enough to believe what she’d done was a dream. Not with this thing inside her mind.
“I was in Death’s arms, and I wasn’t ready to go yet.
I wasn’t ready to let the people I love die because of me.
” She spoke with a surety she was relieved to feel.
“So, I promised to deliver my sister and the gods inside her for the power to save our people.” Vega bit her tongue, holding the rest inside.
For now.
She would tell them later…
Arlet stared into the shadows of the dark cave. “I saw a piece of her. The real Marlena. For just a second.” Arlet’s body racked with an unexpected sob, and she slid to the floor.
Vega was down with her in seconds, wrapping her in a hug as scooted back to use the cave’s wall as a backrest. Arlet sank into her as Khort plopped down on the other side, smoothing her dirty hair.
“Before she told me about the deal with Bridger… she came in, covered in blood, babbling about killing everyone who’d witnessed the acolyte admit she wasn’t the only god.”
Khort shushed her. “Most here still don’t know.” They quietly filled Vega in. Her hand covered her mouth by the time they were done.
Tolevarre knew Vega was a god… But what kind had she come back as?
“You said the gods are inside her?” Arlet asked, a nervous energy coming from her shared connection making Vega tense.
That was what… he—Gods, Vega, just say his fucking name! She battled with herself too much to form words. Vega nodded, unable to admit how she knew.
“She told me they were. She said ‘they killed’ everyone when referring to the massacre in Stella. I saw her fight to keep control against them in her head. Marlena’s getting messy.” Arlet shook as she recalled the memory.
They sat in silence, mulling over what this all meant.
“I have to tell you both something,” Arlet said against Vega’s chest, still wrapped inside Vega’s arms. “And I’m so sorry I kept it a secret this long, but I couldn’t figure out how to approach it, not after what happened…
and then the longer time went on, I didn’t even know if it mattered anymore.
” She laughed a sad sound. “But it does matter. It does.”
Khort continued to smooth her hair against her head, catching Vega’s gaze over the top. His wide eyes mirrored the dread Vega felt.
“It matters,” Arlet repeated, but this time it felt like she was saying it to herself and not her friends. “Marlena and I…”
No.
“I fell in love with Marlena before all of this happened. We were in a secret relationship, sneaking around for about a year.”
Vega stiffened, and Khort’s hand froze in place.
Time paused while Arlet fidgeted under their touch. She didn’t pull away, staying curled up against Vega’s chest.
My best friend and my sister were together, and I never knew.
Vega didn’t know what it was she felt. It was a mixture of complete shock, of being totally blindsided, with a hint of hurt Arlet felt she could only now come clean about this.
What if she would have told them in her first life? Where would they be today with this knowledge?
The only noises in the cave were the echoes of other conversations happening around the main room. Enough silence passed where Arlet finally decided to continue.
“I ended things the Saturnalia before her induction, after she attacked your parents. I was there that day. I saw her almost kill the guard. I saw the person she was becoming, and instead of standing by, instead of helping her through, I left her. What if I—”
“No, no, Arlet, this isn’t your fault.” Vega wrapped her sobbing best friend tighter, resting her hand against Arlet’s head and smoothing her hair like Khort had been.
His hands were in his lap, his eyes glazed over as he processed what they’d learned.
“A butterfly caught in the web of a deadly spider,” Vega said, using the same analogy Arlet had told her in more than one life.
“What if I could have stopped her?” Arlet’s question was almost inaudible but loud enough for the two of them to hear. “What if I’m the reason she snapped?”
Arlet’s sobs caused physical torment inside Vega, her body hurting alongside her best friend’s.
She’d been holding on to this pain all alone the entire time.
“None of us could have predicted what would happen. We were basically kids. Marlena making the choices she made isn’t our fault.
” But Vega would hold herself accountable for all eternity for not saying something to her parents, for not at the very least trying to save the sister she’d once loved.
The sister her best friend had once loved…
“I don’t know what this new power inside me does yet,” Vega admitted.
She knew what she’d done to acquire it, what she’d sacrificed, but she still knew nothing about all it could do.
“But I promise I’ll use it to save everyone from her.
I promise when this is all done, Marlena won’t hurt us or anyone else ever again. ”
None of them moved. No one even made an attempt. They sat there for hours in complete silence after Arlet’s sobs had stopped.
They were back. They were whole. And they would get their vengeance.
After they got Arlet some food and wrapped her in a blanket on a cot by the fire, Vega and Khort sat on the other side at a rickety wooden table with a mug of ale each.
“How many died?” Vega asked, needing to know who all they’d lost when Marlena found Castra.
“152 made it out,” Khort answered solemnly.
Nearly 500 people called Castra home. Vega felt like she might be sick.
“Emil?” Her father’s best friend and seat holder of Imber before it crumbled. He’d been their first real ally.
Khort shook his head, remorse washing over his face. “He helped get the kids out.”
“Fuck.” Vega closed her eyes, sending a silent prayer into the aether for the soul of a man who’d loved her like a daughter. She opened her eyes, and a lump swelled in her throat as the next name came to her mind. “Quinley?”
Khort nodded. “She’s alive. She’s with a small group in Amora right now.”
They had allies in Amora… that was a huge deal. There had never been anyone willing to stand against Marlena there—especially while Ivelle was alive.
“Marlena wiped Solum out. Took the food supply from everyone. We’re barely eating enough, we’re vastly outnumbered, and everyone is exhausted.
” Khort rubbed his thumb against the mug in his hand, catching a falling drop of condensation.
“I’ve spent most of my time over the last month getting people out of the outlying towns where riots and starvation have affected people the worst.”
Vega sat her empty drink down and rubbed her temples. It was only a matter of time before Marlena found them here… if she didn’t already know and wasn’t planning her attack. “We have to get out of these caves.”
Khort reached across the table and grabbed her free hand. “We’ll figure it out.” The touch made Vega sink into him, resting her forehead on the back of his palm.
Vega inhaled his mossy scent, and she knew she was home. It didn’t matter if they were hiding in caves, outnumbered—none of it mattered if she was with them… all of them. “You know Bridger is a part of this, right? We don’t do this without him.”
Vega hated to admit it, especially after the way he’d transformed in front of her eyes when Marlena was around.
What’s he so scared of?
She felt Khort stiffen beneath her, but he rolled his hand over, cupping her forehead and lifting it up, forcing Vega to look at him.
“I know… and I’m sorry for everything. For the fights before you left, the stupid fucking jealousy.
I…” He laughed a little, but it didn’t sound like the one Vega wished she could hear right now.
“I love you, and I want you to be happy. Whatever that looks like for you. But I don’t fucking trust him. ”
Vega’s lips pulled up on one side. “Me either.” Khort’s hand slid down to her cheek, cupping her face. She nuzzled into it and smiled.
“Glad we can agree on that.”
She pulled away, taking a look around the open cave. Vega noted the makeshift cots people were doubled up on. This section of the cave smelled of the smoke wafting off the small fire keeping people warm while they slept. “You know I’m going to have to talk to Meyer.”
Khort sat his mug down. “You don’t have to.”
“Meyer followed me to the Minerva Archives when I snuck away after the battle in Schoenus. He offered me help in getting back to Earth when no one else would.” For Bridger.
“He’s going to come after Bridger. Just like you and Arlet would for me.
There’s nothing standing in his way. This isn’t Marlena’s fortress with 1,000 guards.
” Vega looked around the room again. “It’s a cave with, what, 200 people who are starving? ”
The fight wasn’t over. As tired and as worn-out as they were now, it was nothing compared to what it’d be a week, a month, a year from now.
If they made that long…
Khort’s eyes were heavy with grief as he swept them over the cave and its inhabitants.
“I’m back. I’m really back now.” Vega felt the guilt of her statement bubble until she almost choked on it.
I’m not back forever.
Her words pulled Khort’s attention from the people around him. “It’s time this rebellion shows Tolevarre who Marlena’s up against.” A real smile tugged at Vega’s lips this time. “We’re done hiding… We have the commander of Tolevarre.”