Chapter 46
FORTY-SIX
ARLO
It’s been close to four weeks since we buried Delaney, and I haven’t had the urge to wrap anything around my hands since then.
I think it’s because my mind is so preoccupied with a certain woman who constantly fills my thoughts.
I literally can’t get enough of her, and I’m pretty sure she feels the same way about me.
Cora tries not to spend every night with me, and sometimes, I abide by her rules, knowing it won’t last very long. I think we’ve spent two whole nights apart, and she complained to me both times about how she couldn’t sleep and that I should spend the night again.
Soren has mentioned her a few times and even hinted at marriage.
But I have assured him that it will come.
I just have to do it at the correct time.
I didn’t want to ask her to marry me when she was burying her best friend.
I may be “slightly” obsessed with her, but I have enough common sense to know that wasn’t the time.
And then someone mentioned that maybe she’s trauma-bonding to me, but it’s not that either.
We simply enjoy each other’s company and can’t get enough of touching one another.
If I could spend every night burying myself inside her, I would gladly do it.
When we’re out in public, she has to repeatedly brush my hands away from her because I’m constantly touching her.
She took me to a work event once, and I fucked her in the bathroom. When we were done, she made me promise only to touch her hand for the rest of the night so that we wouldn’t end up right back in the bathroom.
I’m wildly in love with her. I never once thought I would love a woman the way I love her.
Sure, I always loved fucking them, but there was nothing beyond that.
I was terrified to let a woman in because of the abuse I endured at the hands of a woman.
But I can tell when I’m spiraling now, and I know how to pull myself out of it.
When I’m with Cora, she puts me at ease, and that’s something incredibly new and refreshing for me.
I’d always needed my own space and never wanted anyone else to come into it, but I have welcomed her with open arms into every aspect of my life.
She has her belongings here in my bathroom and clothes in my closet that she’s left behind over the past few weeks. I had a new chest of drawers brought in just for her. I don’t think she’s even realized it. Maybe she thought it was there all along, and I don’t plan to tell her any different.
Though I do have a few belongings at her apartment, most of our time is spent at my place. I can tell she likes it here, which will make the offer I’m going to present to her easier, and I hope she accepts it.
Cora spent the day with her mother. I told her I would tag along to help, but she said she likes to do that alone, which I fully respect.
Sometimes, when she visits her mother, her energy is depleted upon returning.
It must be tough to watch someone you love disappear right before your eyes.
On those days, I always make sure to have food ready and sometimes even a bath run for her.
Understanding that she has changed me in so many ways, without even asking me to do so, is another reason I know I fucking love her.
Not even the Forsaken draws me in like it once did.
I used to love attending parties and mingling with others who shared my interests.
And the hunts? Fuck, I was like a kid playing their favorite game when it came time for one.
But my feelings about them have changed since that day.
The thought of putting on that mask after seeing her so broken when she was forced to wear one makes my stomach churn.
But I’ll do it.
Because once you’re in, you’re in.
And I’m so fucking in for her.