Chapter Twenty-Eight #2
Her cheeks were flushed and she held a hand to her chest, constantly checking behind us. “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. I thought about punching him, but that felt way more like assault and then I couldn’t remember if your thumb is supposed to be inside or outside of your fist.”
“Outside of the fist,” I told her as we ducked into a small souvenir shop off the lobby.
“Where’s Brody?” she whispered as I pulled her behind a rack of silk jackets with the Welcome to Las Vegas sign embroidered on the back.
“He made a run for the exit, but he had a few guards on him, so we’ll have to meet him out there in a few.”
“Whatever happened to leave no man behind?” Vera asked frantically as she peeked her head over the rack.
“I don’t think we agreed to that in advance. Besides, you’re the one who assaulted a guy. For all they know, Brody was just an interested bystander.”
“It was a splash of beer!” she quipped back.
“Can I help you two?” the clerk asked with her arms crossed. Her white-blond perm formed a nest on the top of her head and her tattooed eyebrows had faded from black into a dark bluish green.
“No, we’re fine,” I said. “Just playing hide-and-seek with some fr— Fuck!” I dropped down to the ground and took Vera with me.
“What the hell?” she asked.
“Your baby daddy is out there looking for us.”
She rose up on her knees to sneak a glance, but I yanked her back down again.
“I don’t tolerate shenanigans,” the clerk said as she tapped her long red fingernails on the glass countertop. Then she turned to a new customer. “Hello there, young man.”
That’s him, Vera mouthed.
“Can I help you find something? Or someone?” the woman asked, her tone nothing short of devious.
The man made some kind of grunting noises in response.
I scrambled for my wallet and took out my credit card. The same card my mother told me to melt tonight. I was about to light it on fire.
I held up the card until I caught the clerk’s attention.
She looked to me, her eyes bored and lazy.
With a finger pressed to my lips, I pointed to the glass case full of overpriced shitty-ass crystal souvenirs. “Get rid of him,” I barely whispered. “And I’ll buy it all.”
In front of me, Vera’s eyes went wide and she tried swatting my card-carrying hand down.
I took the finger from my lips and pressed it to hers. Her breath was warm on my fingertip and I had to force myself not to let my finger trace her lips.
“Well, if you don’t need anything,” the woman said, “I’m closing up for the night.”
After a torturously long moment, the man huffed a thank-you and left.
The woman raised an eyebrow as she walked over to us with her hand held out. “Time to pay up, handsome. I get a commission on everything that’s in a locked case.”
I relinquished my card and decided that if we didn’t get our asses beat or arrested, this was worth every penny.
“Would you like me to Bubble Wrap everything?” she asked.
“Oh, I’m not keeping it. Give it away for all I care.”
She gave me a slightly confused look and then nodded. I had to assume that working in Vegas, this was one of the least weird things she’d ever seen.
I gave the keychain display next to the counter a quick spin and grabbed a plastic poker chip with Viva Las Vegas stamped onto one side.
“Don’t want to forget the time I went toe-to-toe with a Goliath-shaped human?” asked Vera as she hovered behind me.
“Oh, please trust that the last thirty minutes have been burned into my brain for the rest of my life.”
When the clerk read the total, Vera balked. “You can’t spend that kind of money on—” She turned to the clerk. “No offense—this crap.”
The woman was unbothered. “Wouldn’t be the first time someone blew their money in this place.”
Before we left, Vera asked if she could keep one of the crystals and chose a small die with Las Vegas engraved on the side.
There were still some security guards milling around the perimeter, but by the time we stepped outside of the store, the crowds had calmed and thinned.
“Take off your cardigan,” I told Vera. “Just in case.”
She did so without arguing and followed me as we walked at a normal pace toward the exit.
When we walked past a security guard, she took my hand and tucked her head against my chest so he didn’t see her. It was fake. It was make-believe, but holding her this close felt all too real. When we were in the clear, I didn’t let go.
The moment we stepped outside onto the strip, she broke away from me and searched for Brody. We didn’t have to go far.
The back seat window of an old white limo slowly rolled down to reveal Brody with a glass of champagne in one hand. “Your chariot,” he said.
Vera laughed as the driver got out and opened the door.
“Eli, pay the man!” Brody called.
My nostrils flared as I reached for my wallet again. This time in search of cash.
“A hundred bucks for a thirty-minute joyride up and down the strip,” the driver told me. “Your friend already agreed to it.”
I fished a few twenties out of my wallet and handed them over. “Of course he did.”
Brody wasted no time pouring us each a glass of champagne before turning to Vera. “Technically, Vera, my dear, you failed because you didn’t get kicked out.”
She sputtered and nearly threw her champagne in his face, but then Brody began to pet her shoulder. “But that was the ballsiest thing I’ve ever seen, so you get a pass. However, since you didn’t technically complete your dare, I retain the right to serve up the next truth or dare.”
Vera rolled her eyes and threw her head back against the seat before downing her champagne in one go.
“Eli.” Brody said my name like it was a challenge. “Truth or dare.”
I weighed my options for a moment and decided they were both equally bad. “Truth.”
He nodded dutifully. “Good sir, what was the last thing you yanked your wank to?”
Vera’s eyes widened and the apples of her cheeks turned pink as she opened the second bottle of cheap screw-top champagne.
I had to stop looking at her.
Okay. My options were minimal. I could lie.
I could just fucking lie, and say that I hadn’t gotten off this morning to the image of Vera’s bra strap sliding down her shoulder and what it might feel like to hook my finger through the light pink strap.
I was coming in my hand in a matter of moments. Over a bra strap. I was pathetic.
I definitely could not say that out loud. But Brody had told the truth and Vera had nearly started a riot. So I couldn’t bring myself to lie as much as I wanted to.
“What the hell kind of question is that? Dare.”
Brody shrugged and swirled the champagne in his glass simply because I was pretty sure he’d seen someone on TV do that with a glass of wine before. “Hmmm . . .” His eyes roamed, searching for inspiration. After a second, his whole face lit up and he snapped his fingers. “I dare you to marry Vera.”
“No,” I said. “Fuck you. No.” What was he playing at? He was the one who had made out with her and more. What kind of mind game was this? Or was he just that wasted?
Beside me, Vera choked on her bubbles.
“I don’t know what to tell you, man. You had your chance to answer your truth and you chose dare. This is the dare.”
“This isn’t a dare. This is a legally binding contract.”
Vera hiccupped and quietly chimed in. “I did almost get arrested.”
“Exactly!” Brody said. “Vera dumped a beer on that guy. And you can’t walk down an aisle so some dude dressed as Elvis can pronounce you man and wife?”
I turned to Vera. She had to see how messed up this was. “This isn’t Vera’s dare,” I said. “It’s mine. I hardly think it’s fair to drag her into this. I’m not going to ruin her first wedding just for your stupid game.”
“You act like I believe in the sanctity of marriage or something,” Vera murmured.
I shook my head and threw my hands up. “How am I the only sane person here?”
I could not marry Vera Stein. That only ended in disaster.
I already wanted to strangle Brody when the three of us were together, despite the fact that I didn’t actually hate him.
I just hated him for her. And if she and I got married tonight—even if it was just a dare—and then she went back to him afterward, I would fucking snap.
“It’s only a silly dare,” she said. “Can’t we just immediately file for divorce or something?”
“It’s called an annulment,” I told her.
Brody bobbed his head to the music as he drained the rest of the second bottle. He seemed to think my fate was determined and now it was simply a matter of time.
“Unless you think it’s going to be some kind of scandal for you,” Vera said softly, worrying on her lower lip.
I wondered if anyone had ever nipped at those lips before.
“I’m definitely not the kind of girl that people like your parents approve of.
” Her words ran together, the champagne doing its work. “Wouldn’t want to piss off Daddy.”
Was that really what she thought? That the only holdup here was the fear of shame? I leaned forward across the back of the limo to knock on the divider and the driver slid the glass open. “Take us to the nearest wedding chapel.”
“My babies are getting married!” Brody howled as he rolled down the window. “I’m a proud mama!”