Chapter 24 Saskia #3
Just as I’m about to take a sip to test it out, a high-pitched cry cuts through the smoke. I jerk my head up to witness one of the children tripping as he runs after his friends, sprawling out on his hands and knees—the same boy who fell in the town hall several nights ago.
This time, I resist the urge to rush toward him, despite the pang in my heart rattling through me, begging me to do something. If the boy didn’t want my help that first night, he certainly won’t want it now that I’ve got scary crimson eyes and fangs.
As his mother bends to lift him up by the elbows, however, I spot the scraped knee, dripping with blood that I can smell from here and imbedded with small chunks of gravel and dirt.
And I can’t help it.
“Just a second,” I murmur to Lucan, shoving the glass back into Soren’s hand.
In a flash, I’m down the road in the opposite direction, knocking on the door of Taika’s clinic. A cane thumps on the other end, and Taika’s weathered face appears behind the door when he opens it a sliver.
“Saskia!” He opens the door wider. “The antivenom is still…”
“No.” I shake my head. “It’s not that. Do you have a bandage I could borrow? And maybe some kind of disinfectant?” If nothing else, that boy needs to wash out his wound with some clean water, unless werewolves are naturally resistant to infections or something.
Taika smiles. “Of course.”
Two minutes later, I’m back at the bonfire site, this time with a wet washcloth and a clean strip of fabric.
The back of my neck prickles as Lucan’s eyes trail my every move.
Trying to keep my own eyes downcast and my lips pressed together to hide my fangs, I softly approach the mother and child, still crying as he clutches his knee in the middle of the road.
Both of them stiffen when they look up to find me looming over them.
“Here,” I mumble, holding out the washcloth and fabric.
The boy glances at his mother, tearstains striping his cheeks, then at me, then at his mother again, who gives an encouraging nod.
And the boy sticks out his leg in my direction.
“T-thank you,” he stutters.
For a moment, confusion parts my lips, but I catch on when neither of them moves to take the supplies out of my hand. Bending with a small smile, I gently dab at his blood—an earthy smell, just like Lucan’s—and wrap the strip of fabric around his knee before tying it together.
“There. That should do it,” I say, and the boy hops up to rejoin his friends as if none of it ever happened.
Before I stand up, his mother eyes me with renewed interest. She’s nearing middle-aged, with a few strands of gray streaking her dark brown hair and soft lines around her eyes… although I can’t be sure if she’s forty or four hundred.
“You didn’t have any urge to taste it?” Her voice is low, just for me. “My son’s blood?”
Oh. Oh. I almost press a hand against my chest at how repulsive the thought is—not blood, necessarily, but taking something from the most precious and innocent in our society.
“No.” I shake my head firmly. “I don’t need to drink a lot, but even if I did, I would never take from anyone who didn’t ask me to. ”
She seems to read the earnestness in my eyes, not flinching away from their color, because her muscles suddenly relax.
As if she’s been on edge until this very moment.
My heart pinches over the fact that Lucan’s entire pack—save for maybe Vivian, Soren, and Merrick—has been living with the fear that I might attack them at any moment.
Now, though, the boy’s mother smiles and nods over my shoulder.
“I think you deserve to experience a different kind of drink, then. It doesn’t sound like your Guardians ever let you have fun like this.”
Turning around, I find that Lucan and Soren have drifted over. This time, when I grab the drink, I don’t hesitate before knocking it back like I saw the others doing.
Instantly, fire pours down my throat and lands in my belly. I cough, gasping, eyes bulging.
“That’s disgusting!”
Vivian and Merrick appear at his side, and Vivian snorts. “You won’t think that if you have one or two more. Come on.” She grabs my hand, pulling me away from Lucan. “Let’s dance!”
I have no idea what I’m doing, but soon Ashe does indeed start up a sharp, jaunty tune on a funny-looking instrument, and the notes settle into my bloodstream. Vivian moves my hands up and down until my shoulders loosen, and I begin to mimic the sway of her hips.
“That’s right! Follow the music.” She lowers her voice with a giggle. “Lucan’s looking at your ass.”
Like an idiot, I jerk my head over my shoulder to find that Lucan’s eyes are snapping back up to mine. Grinning, I mouth some words that he waves away with a smirk twitching in the corner of his mouth.
But I don’t stop swaying my hips.
I like the feel of his eyes on me. The burn that cascades down my body.
Smoke infuses my senses, a warm, woodsy scent that fills every space in my head.
The crackling of the fire adds a layered rhythm to Ashe’s song, and my eyes get stuck for a moment, mesmerized by the orange embers flaming like they’re alive.
I almost feel as if I’m one with the smoke, twisting around, lingering in the air.
Vivian moves sensually against me, and I mimic the ribbony flow of her torso as the music slows and drags its notes.
Twirling, I come face to face with Lucan to find that his smirk has deepened. He pulls me into him, folding his body into mine.
“Dance with me, little nightmare,” he breathes against my temple.
I glance back at Vivian, making sure she isn’t left alone, but Merrick is already scooping her up into his arms with a kiss.
Lucan spins me, his fingers digging into my hips as he nestles my ass against his front. I follow his lead with each turn and dip and let my head fall back against his shoulder.
My body starts to warm, a slow tingle spreading up my arms as I reach behind me to clasp the back of Lucan’s neck and just move with the flow.
It’s slow at first, a soft tempo that our bodies keep time to. Our body parts meld together. Our body heat rises. His hands fan out over every inch of my exposed skin. And we just dance together through the soft smoke from the fire.
After who-knows how long, Soren appears in front of my face with another little glass of amber liquid. Lucan chuckles as I squeeze my eyes shut and throw my head back, bracing myself… but it stings a little less going down the second time.
Then the music picks up, and we’re twirling. Lucan lifts me in the air, and laughs tumble out of my mouth as my arms rise above my head.
Until I’m breathless and lightheaded, all wide toothy smiles.
“So, do you like to dance?” he asks me eventually when the music slows into more somber, soft notes.
When I pause, unsure what to do, Lucan situates my left hand around his shoulder and places his right palm on my waist before taking my other hand in his.
I tuck into him as he maneuvers my body and nod against his chest, deciding in the moment that yes, I do like to dance. It’s carefree, energetic, like a string of pure happiness weaving throughout your body.
But my mood shifts suddenly and solemnly with a sigh on my lips.
Looking up at him, I pout. “I’ve missed out on so much.”
All this time, he was dancing and hunting and learning and doing… everything that we couldn’t.
Lucan cocks an eyebrow, eyeing my dramatic bottom lip, before he brushes my hair back and kisses my neck.
“You have so much time,” he says, “to discover everything. Everything you never knew existed. Things you’ll hate. Things you’ll love. I promise I’ll show you.”
I suppose I will if we make it that far, but it’s a strange concept to not even know your true self at twenty-three. I assume that before the Wall and the Guardians, most people began experiencing things like this when they were much younger. And I’ve experienced nothing.
Lucan traces a finger up and down my arm as we stare at each other, lost to the outside world.
“What was it like?” I ask. “Your childhood. Growing up here.”
His eyes trace the ground in front of us, almost guiltily. “It was good.”
“Andddd…” I tease.
“And it was fun.” He pauses, presses his lips against my forehead. “I was a free-range child. Viv, Soren, Merrick, and I, we’ve explored every inch of these woods, every mountain peak.”
“Did you have a school here?”
“Sort of,” Lucan laughs. “One of the older werewolves here tries to get the kids gathered to learn math and reading. But Merrick and I used to ditch all the time to go swimming and fishing in the river. I thought I was such a little bad-ass. We’d jump off roofs, pretending we could fly.
We’d steal apples from Mrs. Wright’s orchard. ”
My eyes widen as I stare at his lips. So pretty. Smooth. Full.
“Drove my mom so crazy, she blames me for her white hair. And, of course, my dad would threaten to skin me alive.”
“That sounds really fun, though,” I say, my heart thumping in a weird pattern of emotions, wondering what it would be like to have such a carefree childhood. “Your parents loved you—love you.”
He nods. “We’ve always been close. And it’s like I have dozens of parents.
Everyone watches out for everyone, and no one can keep a secret for long.
Holidays are always big affairs, with elaborate meals and dancing, even though there are less than fifty of us now.
In true Veradel fashion, we continue to celebrate the little things, the big things.
Births, birthdays, first werewolf shifts, the first night of summer, the first snow. ”
“I couldn’t imagine getting to do anything remotely close to that.”
“I know, baby.” Lucan places a finger under my chin and tips my head up to look me in the eye. “But this is your family now.”
“Lucan!” Soren’s laugh cuts through the haze in front of me. “Why’re you making our girl cry? Is she a sad drunk?”
I blink back the tears threatening to spill, which only causes two to roll down my cheeks, before I let out a wet laugh. “I’m not sad. I’m happy.”
Lucan snarls. “Call her ‘our girl’ again and you’ll be crying, too.”
Soren holds up his hands in protest, each with another glass of what they call alcohol in his grip. “Don’t get your damn balls twisted. I come bearing more gifts.”
Lucan shakes his head at it when Soren holds one out to him.
“You’re no fun anymore,” I joke, taking the other from Soren’s hand and shooting it back as he does the same.
“That’s my—” Soren darts his eyes to Lucan. “—Lucan’s girl.”
Before Lucan can snap at him, Ashe strikes up another song, this time one that makes me jump up and down in excitement. How fast the notes change. How fun it sounds.
Then the world tilts, and I stumble back into Lucan’s chest with a squealing laugh.
“Is this drunk?” I marvel up into his striking face. He nods, smirking as I run the tip of my nose along his jawline. He smells delicious. Not in a way that makes me want to drink his blood, but in a way that makes me want to put my mouth and lips and tongue all over him.
“Feel good?”
“Great,” I confirm, eyes stuck to his lips. I lift my chin to try to reach them with my own. “I want to have sex with you.”
Shit. Did I say that out loud?
Apparently so, because Lucan pulls his shoulders back, wetting both of his lips before one of his canines snags on his bottom one. “Not tonight. You’ll have to settle for more dancing,” he says, standing with me in his arms and placing me back on my swaying feet.
Disappointment flutters through me, but my body still crackles with… fun.
So I settle, but I can’t help myself from touching him. My hands snake under his shirt as we move. Over his biceps. Along the top of his ass.
Why won’t he kiss me?
“I know you want me,” I murmur into his neck after I twist and rub my ass over the hard bulge in his pants.
“That’s not a secret, little nightmare.”
“Then take me,” I beg.
Lucan’s mouth hovers against the shell of my ear. “Not while you’re drunk.”
“I’m not that drunk,” I say, immediately knowing it’s a lie. Whatever this is, I don’t feel normal. But it’s so good.
My hips grind into him, wanting more each time a desperate groan rumbles from the back of his throat. And every time he scolds me and restrains himself, his fingertips digging into my hips, a thrill shoots through me.
But how much restraint can he possibly have?