Chapter 65
LXV.
Kerasea
I stand on the stone terrace of the Senate Hall, the crowd around me perfumed and richer than I’ve even dreamed. The men have been noble for centuries, their mistresses the finest I’ve seen. I can’t have any of them. Not yet, anyhow.
It takes a moment for me to orient myself into this already occurred memory. I feel the same sense of being myself and not, trapped in a decided outcome, yet free to observe through the eyes of someone else.
But I am not Mirial.
As I look at the elite around me, I feel an unfamiliar sense of entitlement along with simmering anger. I deserve everything; I’m owed it. Yet I don’t have it. The Calais family was only made noble twenty-five years ago, our lousy ancestors failing us at every turn.
Revulsion fills me as I realize who I am.
I am walking not in the memories of my friend but of Sentry Lucius Calais.
I don’t know why this is happening—I didn’t use his body to commune with godless death.
But then I remember that I did use my blood to spill his in the tower.
Our blood mingled when I beheaded him, and this is my punishment. I have to walk in his thoughts.
I feel how much he covets and yet hates everything around him, and I can’t escape it. I experience it, seeping through me as if it’s my own emotion.
I stand near elites from the second province, all dressed for the Revelry.
Eyo’s fine little mistress wears a silver string gown that leaves nothing to the imagination.
They’ve been together for a month, and while she’s not the most stunning girl here, she opens her legs and her mouth on command.
I’ve watched them through the keyhole before and have thought about putting her on her knees for me—to experience some of what he has—but I need to be patient.
When I have his villa, I’ll have her, too.
Better than her. Maybe I’ll make the High Priestess mine.
She’s talking to Eyo and wearing a gold dress where I can see her tits, nearly down to her slit.
When I am the senator from the second province, I’ll taste that slit.
A little poison in Eyo’s goblet and I will be voted into his seat, and then I’ll be equal to her.
Greater. I’ll have everything I want, including her.
Kerasea suddenly walks away from him. His play to bed her must have failed.
He seems annoyed as he returns, but his mistress tempts him, licking her lips and whispering in his ear.
He’s not any better-looking than I am—I’m younger and more muscular—but these women climb into his bed for his status. They’ll act the same way for me soon.
“I have to piss,” I say as I watch the High Priestess leave.
Eyo glances at me. “Well don’t do it here.”
Everyone laughs like he’s hilarious, and he kisses his mistress. He’ll probably bend her over this balcony railing before the night ends.
Anger boils inside me, but I can’t act on it.
Not until the second day of the conclave.
Medea’s instructions were crystal clear, and the she-wolf must be obeyed.
Her promises are as real as her threats.
She elevated my father after he poisoned her twin brother.
Father stayed loyal, and she rewarded him. It’s that easy.
I bow to Eyo and smile, knowing that he has only days to live.
Now that I’ve been excused, I can follow Kerasea. I turn to leave, but the Praetorian is far ahead of me, stalking her. I was told he’d hunt her down, but no one has been killed yet. He must just want her for himself.
I take the corridor toward the latrines, but I stop in my tracks as there are whispered voices near the bathroom. I take a left and slide out of sight. Leaning against the wall, I strain to pick up the sounds. The hushed tones signal a secret—something worth knowing.
“Remember, not a drop of blood, and you must plant the knife,” Medea says. I’d know her voice anywhere.
“It will be done,” a man responds. I’m not sure who it is.
“To the end of the Verity Guild,” Medea says.
“To the future, my love,” he replies.
Footsteps come in my direction, and I slip inside the doorway to one of the senate offices. If anyone turns their head fully, they’ll spot me. I wait with my heart pounding as Medea passes. She doesn’t turn. I exhale. I wait another moment, and then I go to the latrines.
As I piss, I realize she is having someone killed tonight.
I wonder who.
I gasp and wake with a start. I’m not in my own chambers—I’m in Tor’s bed.
He lies sleeping peacefully beside me, his arm around me.
I move to wake him. Something important just happened, something crucial.
It sits at the tip of my tongue, but I’m too exhausted to remember what it was.
I’m so groggy that I immediately fall back to sleep.