CHAPTER 19
APRIL
Devi and I measure nautilus shells and their trails into the sand for hours.
She's not interested in getting rid of them inasmuch as she's interested in comparing the size of them to how far up the beach they go.
With a long strand of marked rope, she measures, and I write out notes for her to go over later.
Makana starts to grunt at me, a sign that he wants down, and I pull him out of his sling and let him wander on the rocks while Devi and I take a break.
A quick glance down the beach shows that Valmir is working with several others, digging a trench in the path of one of the oncoming shelled creatures.
Devi hums in surprise at the sight. "I wonder if that will work, trying to adjust their route?
Or are they going to ignore it and push forward like they always do?
There's only one of the tentacled feet that does the pushing.
That's why they're so slow." Her expression is bright with interest. "Isn't that fascinating?
It's like the other arms are used to catch prey but there's only one designated for movement.
They can't figure out how to redistribute the workload. Their brains must not be big enough."
"That is interesting," I say, but my gaze is on Valmir and his big shoulders flexing as he tosses another shovelful of sand out of the way.
Like the other men, he's stripped to the waist and digging as Jason calls out instructions and two of the kits try to scoop tidewater away with shells.
It looks like a futile task, but it doesn't hurt to try, I suppose.
And Valmir looks good as he works. I admire the breadth of his shoulders and the flick of his tail as he bends over to dig his shovel in again.
Watching him work should not be such a turn on...
and yet I can't stop looking at him. I can't wait to be alone with him again.
I want to run my hands all over his sweaty shoulders and let him know that I'm proud of him.
That him being part of a team is a huge turn-on because I know he's doing it to please me.
Devi moves to my side, noticing my fixation on Valmir. "Resonance worked out for you?"
"Oh yeah." I manage a wry smile. "All that fighting it and there ended up being no point."
"I understand. I think there's something psychological to resonance.
Everyone always ends up paired with the person who makes them happiest, even if they don't want to be with them.
That tells me that either the khui is influencing our hormones and our brains, or the other way around.
I'd love to study someone who ends up resonating to a person they hate and continue to hate, but that never seems to happen.
" She gives me an interested look. "Is there any lingering loathing on your end? "
"Afraid not."
"Darn."
"Thanks, I think?"
She pats my arm. "I'm just always interested in the biological aspects of things more than the people aspects.
Don't take it personal." Devi takes the rows of notes I've made on a framed skin and studies them.
"This is good, though. I appreciate the help.
What are you and Valmir doing later? You can come and sit with me and N'dek.
We've got room in the cave we're sleeping in, too. "
"I appreciate the offer. We haven't thought that far ahead to tonight just yet."
Devi nods absently and makes a note on the skin. It's stretched taut so it can be written on, almost like a slate. "Unless you like your meat raw. Then you might have to stay somewhere else. The smell turns my stomach right now."
"I like my meat in a can." The joke rolls off my tongue before I think about it.
Devi looks up at me. "Huh?"
"Sorry, Hawaiian joke. Spam musubi is really popular back home. I used to get it from a gas station near my house on a daily basis."
Her expression brightens. "Oh, did you remember where you're from?"
"Parts of it. Pieces are coming back to me. Not whole chunks, but tidbits here and there. Some pieces of language, some of customs. Not really people or places." I'm practically bouncing with excitement to share it. "I even remembered my own name, my real name."
She makes a distracted sound of agreement. "Great."
And then I laugh to myself at how unbothered she is, because no one else cares where I'm from other than me. I'm just grateful to have answers, unlike Natalie or Vivi, who have nothing. Or Valmir, who is intimately aware of everything he's missing.
Valmir cares, though. Valmir celebrated with me. Warmth flows through my belly. We'll continue sharing with our baby when it's born and teach them all about their ancestors.
Makana moves back to my boot and scratches at it with a grunt, a signal that he wants to be picked up. Smiling, I heft him into my arms and tuck him into his sling. As I do, Devi's analytical gaze moves on to the two-fang, and I suspect she's going to ask to study him soon enough. "You kept him?"
"More like he kept me," I joke. "We tried to release him but he's happiest with us. He wouldn't leave no matter what we did."
"Baby schema tied with learned helplessness," Devi says with a nod, her face becoming distracted. "I wonder if they adjust their nature in order to ensure survival." She thinks for a moment and writes a few more things down at the bottom of the skin. "Would you let me study him?"
"It depends. Does studying involve dissection?" I put my hands protectively around my pet's sling.
"Oh, no. I'd try seeing how he'd react to a few different stimuli.
I'd love to see his reaction if you leave the room and abandon him in it.
" She beams at me. "All harmless, I assure you.
My son would be horrified if I thought to harm your creature.
I wouldn't be surprised if he asks for one of his own. "
"They like roots," I offer. "And being carried like babies."
"Who doesn't?" Devi says brightly.
By the end of the day, one nautilus on the shore is successfully diverted to an alternate path.
There is much rejoicing by the males who worked to dig the new trench all day, and lots of backslapping with pride.
Valmir is practically beaming as he struts back to camp for dinner.
"Did you see?" he asks me, his arm going around my waist. "We got it to change directions. Tomorrow we're doing another."
"You did amazing," I reassure him, pleased when Corvak walks past and gives him a friendly slap on the shoulder.
It's a quiet acknowledgment that maybe Valmir is finding his place amongst the group other than "designated tribe asshole.
" I'm so happy for him. "You must be exhausted. Come sit with me. I saved you a seat."
Moving near the center of the group near the fire, I park Valmir on a seat in the midst of things.
Part of me expects him to protest, but Bek and Elly immediately move on the other side and he relaxes.
He and Bek get along well. They both have short tempers when it comes to idiots, and I like Elly.
She's sweet and shy and they have the most adorable daughter.
Since Valmir has been working on digging a trench, I grab bowls of food for both of us and thank O'jek, who oversees the cooking tonight.
The soup smells like it's full of herbs and makes my mouth water.
I thank him and move back to Valmir's side, and he looks up at me in surprise when I hand him the food. "I should be getting that for you."
"You were holding our seats," I tell him. "It's fine."
I sit next to him and lean over him, draping myself against his shoulder. He looks surprised and pleased at my possessiveness, and his tail curls around my hips. I kiss his cheek, his whiskers brushing my skin. I like that we're together, in front of everyone, as we should be.
As we eat, the conversation turns toward what the men accomplished today. Liz and Raahosh join our small group at dinner and want to know the details of what digging the trenches entailed and how long it took.
"There are more in the water that will beach tomorrow.
Bring Gren in to work," Raahosh says, his scarred face hard and unyielding.
"He's strong. U'dron will help, too. Anyone that's able-bodied and isn't needed for hunting can take a shovel.
We can split your group up and re-route any of the snails we need to. "
"Ashtar?" Valmir asks. "The big dragon can do more than we can."
"He probably could, but he flew out to Croatoan earlier." Raahosh gets to his feet. "You can handle it. You, Bek, and Corvak are in charge."
Liz points at Valmir and Bek. "Hear that, you two? You're in charge." She points at her eyes and then at them again. Then she turns and follows her mate, her voice trailing after them. "God, I love it when you're so leader-y, babe. Makes me hot."
I stifle a laugh and fish a shrimplike creature out of my soup. It still has a head and I know that's my pussycat's favorite bite. I hold it up to Valmir. "You want?"
He eats from my hand, his lips brushing over my fingertips. "Now you're feeding me like your pet."
"Play your cards right and I'll cuddle you between my boobs like him, too."
Valmir's tail swats my hip. He skewers a chunk of root on his eating utensil and offers it to me. "No eyeballs on this."
"You know me so well already." I nibble it from his utensil.
"I know you better than anyone," he says, and his eyes are hot with meaning. It makes my belly flutter with arousal, and I can't stop smiling.
"Oh my god, feeding each other. That's sickeningly cute already. Resonance always knows what it's doing," Penny comments as she passes by. She gives me a pat on the shoulder, leaning in. "Can I leave Brenna with you guys for a moment? I need to grab a shawl because it's chilly out here."
She doesn't wait to get an answer, just parks her daughter in front of us and hurries off.
The little girl stares at us, her wispy blonde hair pulled into two tiny pigtails. Her dress looks like something out of the Flintstones, and she gives us a shy smile as she stands near the fire.
"Come sit with us," I tell Brenna, straightening and patting my leg.
She moves forward, but instead of sitting with me, she moves to Valmir's side and leans against his knee. "Your tail is pwetty."
"Of course it is, little friend." He leans in close to her, dropping his voice to a confessional tone. "I'm the handsomest male on this beach. Don't tell Jason."
Brenna giggles and continues to lean against Valmir's leg. She notices his bowl and puts one sandy, sticky finger into the dish and grabs a chunk of food.
"Help yourself," Valmir says in a wry voice, lowering the bowl so she can eat more. "I was done anyhow."
I bite back a laugh and hand my utensil to my mate. "Here you go, beautiful. We can share."
His tail swats my hip again, even as he grins at me. Brenna giggles, the bowl in her hands practically tipping, and Valmir has to rescue it before she makes a mess. "Why don't I hold it while you eat?" He tells the little girl. "Just consider me your table."
My heart is full of aloha as I watch him tend to the little girl and he talks with Bek about plans for tomorrow. Maybe he didn't know how to be part of the group before, but I'll make sure he is from this point on.
There's hope for my cranky pussycat yet.