14. Caterina
It’s the end of our honeymoon.
I’m disappointed, but I’m not going to tell Emilio. He would either tease me about it or act indifferent. I can tell he’s getting antsy about getting back to work. I’m just worried the little bit of progress we made will just go down the drain the minute we’re back in New York. Although Emilio and I aren’t in a great place, we’re in a good place. We still bicker all the time, but it’s less biting and more playful. I don’t want to lose that.
“How do you feel about going home?” I ask Emilio on the plane.
“I’m ready to get back to work. Dante is still out there, and it’s my responsibility to find him.”
“Why does it have to be your responsibility? Can’t Rocco or Massimo go after Dante?”
“They can, and I’m sure they have been while I’ve been away. But before we got married, Rocco enlisted me to be the one to find him. And I intend to make my brother proud.”
“Ok. Just don’t forget about us when we get back home.”
He frowns. “Trust me, Caterina. It would be impossible for me to forget about you.”
That’s not what I mean, but there’s no use telling him that.
We arrive home without getting into a fight on the airplane, which I think shows how much we’ve grown. Emilio doesn’t seem as annoyed with my presence any longer. In fact, he seems like he enjoys spending time with me—not that he’d ever admit it.
We take a taxi to Emilio’s house, which I haven’t actually seen before. He lives in a brownstone that must have cost millions. Both the inside and out are decorated in dark wood tones. Instead of being oppressive, it’s actually quite nice and warm. Cozy.
“So,” I say, after he’s given me a tour. “What should we get up to?” I flutter my eyelashes at him and rake my fingers down his chest.
I expect him to grab me and fuck me like he likes to do.
But instead, he takes a step back. “I have work,” he says, sounding only slightly apologetic. “Another time.” And just like that, he walks away from and goes into his study, leaving me to stand there and wonder what I’m going to do.
Well, what I know is, I’m not going to wait around for Emilio. I’m not that desperate.
So, I call Gabriella and ask if she wants to meet up. Emilio surely can’t object to me hanging out with his sister.
“Gabriella and I are going out,” I say through his office door. I’m expecting a fight. I sort of want a fight.
“All right,” he calls back. “Have fun.”
I huff, crossing my arms. I get it’s his sister, but I assumed he’d want to control me more. Ever since we met, he’s been trying to control me, and now … now he’s cool with me just going out?
“Did you hear me?” I ask. “Gabriella and I are going out.”
“I heard you. I’m ok with that. Now, I really need to work. Stop bothering me.” And there it is—annoyance.
I step away from his door, feeling … hurt, honestly. We were hot and heavy on our honeymoon, even if some of it was because we hated each other. But Emilio was never distant.
Now, he is, and I don’t know what to make of it.
I tell myself he just wants to settle back into his routine, and I’ll give him some space, but I’m worried he’ll want to settle too much into his old routine—his old routine that didn’t include me.
But why should I care what Emilio thinks? I should love being able to leave the house and hang out with the girls. I’ve always hated how much he’s bossed me around. And yet, I sort of miss it.
God, I’m fucked up.
I shake my head and leave to spend the day with Gabriella.
* * *
“So, how was the honeymoon?”Gabriella asks as we take our seats at the café table. Lara and Ophelia are also with us.
“You really want to know?”
Gabriella scrunches up her face. “Well, not everything. More so, how are you and Emilio doing? I know there was some tension between you two before you left. Is that still a problem?”
“Yes. But instead of Emilio being annoyed with me, he’s now distant. He immediately went into work instead of spending the day with me. We just got back from our honeymoon. I expected more, but I guess I shouldn’t have. Emilio tends to disappoint me. It’s, like, he would freak out if I went to the club, but if I died in front of him, I don’t think he’d even notice.”
“Don’t say that,” Lara says, giving me a sympathetic expression. “Emilio would care if you got hurt. He’s a De Luca. They all care about their family.”
“You say that because you and Rocco love each other. Emilio and I don’t. We have great sex, but that’s about it.”
Gabriella claps her hands over her ears. “La, la, la. I don’t need to hear that.”
Everyone laughs.
Ophelia turns to me. “When Massimo and I got married, I was terrified of him. But he was kind, and I was able to open up. Now, we’re in love. But it took a while. Give yourself time with Emilio. He’ll come around.”
“How do you know?”
“Because Massimo was a playboy before I met him, and he’s changed. Emilio will change, too.”
I smile, but it feels forced. “I appreciate all your support. I really do. But I’m just not sure if Emilio will ever change. He’s too stubborn for that. I know he’s dealing with the whole Dante thing?—”
Gabriella perks up. “What Dante thing?”
“Oh. He’s trying to find Dante and … well, end him, I guess.”
“Oh. My brothers never told me they were going after Dante.” She sounds … disappointed?
I look at her more closely. “Emilio said Dante kidnapped you.”
“He did,” she says quickly. “And it was terrifying. I just wasn’t informed; that’s all. I always get a little salty when my brothers keep things from me, like I’m a porcelain doll on a shelf.”
“Rocco probably wants to keep you as a doll forever,” Lara says. “That way, no one can hurt his precious baby sister.”
Gabriella sticks her tongue out at her. “Well, he can’t keep me on a shelf forever. I just hope they find Dante and make him pay for what he did to our family.” Her words said one thing, but her eyes say another.
“What is it about this Dante? I’ve never met him,” I say.
“He’s handsome,” Gabriella blurts out, then blushes. “But that’s not an important detail, is it?”
Lara shakes her head. “It’s not.”
“From what I heard,” Ophelia says, sparing Gabriella more embarrassment, “Dante tried to kill Rocco. And he kidnapped Lara and Gabriella. And now, he wants to take over. That’s what Massimo has told me. I just hope they can stop him before he does anything worse.”
“I agree,” I say. “He sounds like a bad man.” If Dante is this evil and hell-bent on going after Emilio and his family, I get why Emilio didn’t want me going off alone. He had his reasons, and I can’t be mad about it.
I’m determined to go home and make things work with Emilio, even if he keeps trying to push me away.
After I get home, I knock on Emilio’s study.
“What is it?” he asks.
“Are you free?” I ask, opening the door.
He barely glances up at me. “Caterina, I’m swamped with work. Another time.”
“Will there be another time?”
He sighs. “Don’t do that.”
“Do what?”
“What you’re doing. Judging me for working right now.” He finally looks up at me, “I’m busy. We can spend time together another time.”
“But when?”
“I don’t know,” he snaps.
“What happened to the man who went down on me in a bathroom? You changed overnight.”
“I didn’t. I just got back from our honeymoon and need to get work done. I need you to respect that. I will find time for you.”
“Sure. Pencil me into your schedule,” I say sarcastically.
He runs a hand down his face. “I’m trying here, Caterina. I really am.”
“No. If you were trying, you’d promise me we could go on a date later the week. Or we could spend time after you’re done working for the day. But you’re not doing that. Because you want to be working. You’d rather work than spend time with me. And you can’t give me a good answer about when we can spend more time together. I want to make our marriage work. Don’t you?”
He stares at me and doesn’t respond.
I fight back tears at the realization. “Don’t you?”
“Yes,” he finally answers. “I want to try, but you make it so difficult. Now, I need to work. I’ll come get you when I’m done.”
“Whenever that will be.”
“Yes. Whenever that will be. You live your life on my terms. Not the other way around.”
“You haven’t changed at all,” I say sadly before walking out of his study. I want him to come running after me, but I know he won’t.
And he proves me right.
In my anger, I pace around the house. I can’t stay here. I know I promised Emilio I wouldn’t do anything stupid or reckless, but I cannot stay in a house with a man who would rather ignore me than spend time with me. I know he needs to work, and I’m fine with that. I just wish he would promise me some time together, but he can’t even do that.
And if he can’t keep his promise to work on our relationship, then I’m not going to keep my promise about staying safe.
I’m going back to the club because I want to dance and have fun for just one night. I deserve that.
And no one can stop.
I walk out the door, and Emilio doesn’t even notice, which only pains me more.