31. Jamison #9
I poured more lube into my palm and stroked myself slowly, watching her watch me.
Her gaze was helpless now, following every movement, fear and need tangled so tightly I could barely separate them.
I slicked myself thoroughly, because pride had no place in causing pain I could prevent, then guided the head of my cock against her.
Her arms came around my neck.
I rested my forehead against hers, keeping the head of me pressed at her entrance, letting her feel the pressure without taking it farther. Even that made her body tense around nothing, trying to understand the shape of me.
“It’s going to hurt at first,” I said softly. “I hate that, but I won’t lie to you.”
Her nails brushed the back of my neck.
I kissed her again.
Then I started to push in.
Only the head at first.
Barely.
Her body resisted immediately, tight around the first blunt pressure of me. I stopped as soon as her breath caught.
“Let daddy in baby. I want to stretch your pussy for me.” I murmured against her mouth.
“You’re barely in…”
“I know, baby.”
Her body fluttered around the head of me, trying to make space. I could feel every tiny movement.
I felt myself slip in a fraction more. She gasped, nails pressing into my shoulders.
I stopped.
“That’s it,” I said, voice strained. “That’s all for a second. Good girl. You’re doing so well. You’ve got all of daddy’s tip in. Look at you baby”
“It burns.”
I moved my hand between us and touched her, gentle circles where she was swollen giving her body pleasure to focus on while I held still. I kept touching her until her thighs relaxed wider.
I had never had to work this hard for an inch of anything in my life.
I kissed her mouth, soft and slow, while my hips pressed another fraction forward. Her body tightened around me at once, so tight I had to stop breathing for a second.
“Good,” I whispered against her lips. “You’re taking me. Little by little.”
“It hurts.”
“I know, baby. I know.” I brushed her hair back from her forehead.
She gasped, and her hips lifted a little, uncertain but seeking.
Her lashes fluttered.
I pushed deeper.
Her mouth opened around a sound that punched through my chest. Tears slipped from the corners of her eyes and ran into her hairline.
So close.
I held her face in one hand, her hip in the other, and pressed forward with the last slow, steady push.
Her body gave around me.
A small, sharp cry broke from her throat as I seated fully inside her, and the world went white at the edges.
Fuck.
My hips flush to hers, my body locked over her, around me so tight and perfect that I had to bite down on a sound that would have been closer to prayer than pleasure.
Sienna cried silently beneath me.
Tears slid down both temples, her face turned slightly to the side, lips parted, hands clutching me as if I was the reason it hurt and the only reason she could bear it.
I kissed one tear away.
Then the other.
“Daddy’s home, baby,” I whispered.
Her breath hitched.
I kissed her temple again. “I’m here. I’m right here.”
“It hurts,” she whispered.
“I know. Let it hurt for a second. Don’t fight it.” I kept my voice low and steady, my body still even though every instinct in me wanted motion. “You gave me something so fucking special. Do you understand? I know it hurts. Daddy’s here.”
Her fingers slid into my hair, gripping hard.
I lifted my hips the smallest amount, enough to ease the worst pressure without leaving her, then settled back with care. “There we go. All done, baby. The first part is done.”
She cried harder at that, quiet and overwhelmed.
I held her through it.
“Look at me.”
Her eyes opened, wet and dazed.
I kissed the corner of her mouth. “You’re okay.”
She nodded, but her mouth shook.
“I’ve got you.”
Another nod.
“Say it.”
“You’ve got me.”
“Good girl.”
Her body fluttered around me, and my vision darkened with the effort it took to stay still. She was so tight it was obscene. So warm I could barely think. So completely mine in this moment that some older, uglier thing inside me lifted its head and recognized the shape of forever.
Primitive.
Crow.
Animal.
This was it.
I had forgotten the feel of everyone else before I even understood I was forgetting. Sienna took the last ghost of them and burned it down simply by looking up at me with tears in her eyes and my body inside hers.
Only mine.
The thought wasn’t pretty.
It wasn’t civilized.
It was bone-deep and vicious, a claim that moved through me as old as hunger.
This pussy was mine for life.
This soft, trembling body would know only me this way. Only my cock. One day she would carry my children in this body, and the thought hit so hard I had to close my eyes and press my mouth to her forehead.
Children.
Her stomach round with mine.
Our bed.
My wife.
Home.
I had looked for that word in estates, cars, territory, brothers, whiskey, violence, rooms full of men who feared me. I had never found it because it was under me, crying softly, holding my shoulders while her body learned how to let me in.
“Oh, baby,” I murmured, kissing her temple again. “My beautiful girl.”
Her arms tightened around my neck.
“You’re so fucking beautiful wrapped around me.”
She made a small sound, shy even now, and hid her face against my jaw. She breathed through the pain, little by little, and I felt the moment it began to ease. Her body stopped bracing so hard. The tight, frightened grip softened into something still intense but less panicked.
“Daddy’s here,” I whispered. “Hey. Look at me, baby.”
Her eyes opened again.
“There you are. Follow daddy’s breathing as your sweet little pussy welcomes daddy dick.”
She followed my breathing, shaky at first, then steadier. In. Out. Her chest brushed mine with each breath, her nipples tight against my skin, her legs still open around my hips though the muscles trembled from the strain.
When the sharpest pain faded from her face, I moved my hand between us.
She tensed.
“Gentle,” I said at once. “I’m giving you something good.”
Her lashes fluttered as my fingers found her clit again, slick and sensitive. I circled lightly, barely enough pressure, and her whole expression changed in a rush.
Pain loosened.
Pleasure flickered through.
“You’re so big,” she whispered.
I dropped my forehead to her shoulder. “Baby, my ego can’t take any more tonight. Seriously.”
She gave me a pout. “The gods were too kind to you.”
I lifted my head and looked down at her, while I brushed my thumb over her clit again, soft enough to make her breath tremble.
Letting her adjust around the shape of me, around the truth of us, around the fact that this bed had become the first honest room we had ever shared.
My hand slowed when her breathing steadied.
Her legs shifted around my hips, no longer trying to escape the stretch.
I kissed her temple.
“Daddy’s home,” I whispered.
She closed her eyes and held me tighter.
Home.
The word stayed in me while her body clenched around me so hard I stopped breathing. My forehead dropped to hers.
“Baby,” I breathed. “You need to relax for me.”
“I’m trying,” she whispered.
Her voice was small and wrecked, but her arms were locked around my neck as if I was the only solid thing left in the world.
Clung.
After all the years I had made her reach for me and receive nothing.
She clung now.
I kissed her, slow at first, then softer when she winced around the first involuntary pulse of me inside her.
My hand stayed between us, fingers circling gently, coaxing pleasure back.
I felt the exact moment her body began to listen.
Her thighs loosened by a fraction. Her breath shook out against my mouth.
The tight clench eased, then returned around me in a sweeter flutter that made my hips want to move.
I held still. Barely. I kissed her again, and this time when I drew back, I watched her face as I lifted my hips.
“Daddy.” Her mouth opened.
The word hit me low and hard.
My hips pressed flush before I could stop the final inch, and she gasped, clutching at my back.
“Fuck,” I rasped. “Say that again when I’m inside you, and you’re going to find out how much trouble a sweet mouth can cause.”
“Daddy,” she whispered again, softer, needier, as if testing the effect.
Brat.
Perfect little brat.
I gave her one slow thrust in answer.
Her head tipped back into the pillow, and the sound she made dragged through me like a hook.
Pain was still there, I could see it in the tight line around her eyes, but pleasure had begun threading through it now.
A sweetness my fingers coaxed higher while my cock stretched her around the rhythm I built inch by inch.
“Good,” I said, bending to kiss her jaw. “That’s it. Feel how your body’s learning me?”
She whimpered.
I moved again, a little deeper this time. Her body clenched hard around me on the inward stroke and I groaned into her neck.
“Jesus, baby. You feel so fucking good.”
Her hands slid into my hair. “It’s too much.”
“I know. I’ve got you.” I kissed down her throat, my hips moving in tiny, controlled strokes. “Too much and still taking me. You’re doing so well.”
She shook under me, but her legs shifted higher around my waist, her heels pressing into my back as if she wanted me closer despite the ache.
That little movement did something irreversible to my sanity.
I took her mouth again, licking into it while my hips found a slow, deep grind that kept me buried and let her adjust around the fullness. Her body gripped me harder every time I pressed in, and the pressure was so perfect I had to pull back from the kiss and breathe through it.
“Do you understand how hard you’re making this?” I asked, voice rough.
Her eyes opened, dazed. “I’m sorry.”
“No.” I caught her face, making sure she heard me. “Never apologize for feeling good. I mean you’re killing me. Sweetly. Thoroughly. With that perfect little body clenching around my cock as if it already knows who owns it.”
Her breath hitched.
There.
She liked the dirtier edge.
I thrust again, still gentle but fuller, and her nails scored my shoulders.