Team Chat #3

Berger

LIVE from an undisclosed latitude: the water is a nine-four and i am unreachable until spring training

Marchetti

you sent coordinates with no caption. i checked. that’s open ocean

Berger

the coordinates were the caption

Baz

MEANWHILE. in actual news. the cats have gone up

Marchetti

PARKER NEEDS THE JERSEY. where did the jerseys come from. this is urgent

Baz

sadie has a guy

Murray

my kids have demanded a cat. this is your fault

Thompson

what does LITTER C mean

Baz

it arrived in a dream

Thompson

that’s not an answer

Baz

dreams don’t answer, cher. they announce

Marchetti

theory. C is for captain. the litter has a captain

Baz

the litter has a COMMISSIONER. there’s a difference

Marchetti

nonna has asked if the cats are baptized. i don’t know what to tell her

Baz

tell her they’re old catholic. it’s a louisiana thing

Berger

LIVE from the boat: i showed a stranger the cats. she cried. the cats reach EVERYONE

also i demand print rights. museum quality. numbered edition

Tikh

the picture is approved. there will not be others

Berger

THE ARTIST IS DIFFICULT

Tikh

the fan accounts are not authorized. i am watching them

Berger

THE ARTIST HAS LAWYERS?

Baz

also official log update. the keeper recorded one (1) cat hair in the bowl. mishka has a permanent record now. we’re framing that too

Jensen

good cats

Murray

gas station update. the kids saw the cat post. they cheered again

Berger

also LIVE from the actual internet: hockey beat writers are running our cap math again. with names in it this time

Murray

they do that for every team in july

Berger

not with names

Thompson

maki. this time the math has your number in it

M?kinen

my agent says it’s noise

also rule nine still has the typo. somebody tell the keeper

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