CHAPTER TWENTY #3
My gaze was still on the others, but I sensed Laurie’s surprise.
Maybe it was in the way he went still, or the swiftness of how he turned when he realized what I was saying.
I kept my attention on the figures around the table as I continued, “I knew I was falling that night outside the tomb. You kissed me and went inside, and it felt like you’d taken my heart with you.
But it wasn’t until Germany, when we were in those tunnels beneath the city …
that’s when I fell in love with you. You’d just been stabbed a dozen times, and I held you in my arms while we waited for a healer.
I didn’t think you’d survive. That’s when I imagined a world without you, and it was …
unbearable. Just unbearable. Then the healer came, and she fixed you.
You opened your eyes and looked at me, and you said something stupid.
I’d never felt relief like that, or such a rush of happiness.
Yeah, that was it. That was the moment I knew. I was a fucking goner.”
Smiling, I finally looked at Laurie again, and he looked back at me. His throat shifted as he swallowed. The light in his eyes was almost childlike, as though he’d been told something he desperately wanted to believe.
“And there it is,” he said softly. “Hope.”
Before I could reply, Laurie pushed off the fridge and walked toward the chaos, rolling up his sleeves as he went. “All right,” he declared, “let’s focus, people.”
“Laurie, dear, back so soon?” Emma beamed and began to stand up from her chair. Laurie quickly sifted and reappeared in front of her, bending to accept the old woman’s embrace.
I moved to join them, too, and we got back to work.
The next hour crawled by. The one after that was even worse. I only lifted my head to drink water and stretch my neck. The words and images in front of me began to blur, but I pressed on, even when a headache pulsed behind my eyes.
The sound of Matthew’s familiar cries finally drew me out of my task.
Collith must’ve left the loft at some point, because when I scanned the room for him, he was nowhere in sight.
The bathroom door was open and the light inside was off.
Damon and Danny were gone, too, and I knew they were probably in the bedroom with Matthew.
Laurie sat back with a sigh. “This is pointless. We’re not going to find our salvation in some old book.”
“I thought you believed in miracles,” I mumbled, staring at the empty coffee mug in front of me. I tried to muster the will to stand and refill it.
“I said that so you wouldn’t give up hope. As for me, one of us has to be a realist.” Laurie rubbed his eyes with his thumb and middle finger. He got to his feet and reached for his phone, saying, “I need to check in with my people.”
On his way to the door, I saw him take a bottle of wine from the counter.
“I better get back,” Savannah said. “I have some spells going at my worktable. I put a protection charm on your armor, Fortuna, but the ones I put on your body will have to be done tomorrow.”
“I’ll keep the walkie-talkie on me,” I said, nodding.
She nodded back and crossed the room. It was going to be a long night for her, too.
Savannah and the Tongue planned to put spells on all the Guardians and their weapons.
We needed every advantage we could get. If it were any other witch, she’d probably be drained of magic for days, weeks.
But Savannah was part of the Unseelie Court now, just as I had my Shadows, and the burden was not on her shoulders alone.
She still planned to help the healers tomorrow, during the chaos of battle.
After she’d donned her coat, Savannah gave us another wave and went down the stairwell. My gaze fell, noting the object she’d left behind on the floor. “Shit, she forgot her basket. I’ll be right back.”
Truth be told, I was grateful for the excuse to take a break. I knew the others probably needed one, too. They were so tired that no one even looked up as I grasped the handle of Savannah’s basket and hurried downstairs.
She was still crossing the lawn when I ran outside. I called out her name, and Savannah paused. As I handed the basket over she said, “Thanks, Fortuna.”
“See you tomorrow, Sav. Thank you for the protection charm.”
Hearing the sincerity in my tone, she gave me a weary smile before continuing on toward the woods.
I watched her go, thinking about how much had changed since she’d killed Fred.
Once, I couldn’t have imagined trusting Savannah Simonson, much less becoming friends.
Now she was one of my biggest allies in this fight, and she might very well be the reason we all survived.
After another moment, I turned back to the loft.
I’d taken a few steps toward the door when raised voices echoed through the stillness.
I recognized them instantly. Were Collith and Laurie fighting?
For a moment, I wondered if I should just stay out of it.
Then I thought, Fuck that. I lowered my body and crept through the trees the way Lyari and Finn had taught me, choosing every step carefully, walking on tiptoe.
I followed the rising and falling crescendo of Laurie’s voice, which moved through the shadowed trees like dark velvet.
Within a minute, I spotted two silhouettes standing in a dim patch of moonlight.
I drew even closer. I wanted to know what they were fighting about, and whether or not I should intervene.
I moved forward to creep over a fallen pine and duck beneath a branch.
A moment after that, Collith and Laurie were in full view.
The moment I laid eyes on them, I realized I shouldn’t have gone through the trouble of being quiet.
They were so absorbed in each other that neither of them heard me.
I heard a ragged sound, a soft whoosh of air that could only be a sob.
The moon must’ve come out from behind a cloud—it cast brightness over the faerie kings, making them look unreal, not of this world. Both achingly beautiful.
Collith was embracing Laurie, his face buried in the curve between his head and shoulder. His voice was muffled but the breeze carried the fragmented words to me: “… a million times … I wish I could …”
A knot formed beneath my heart. My hand fell from the tree I’d been using for cover, and I moved back. Witnessing this moment between them felt wrong. It didn’t belong to me. I turned to go back the way I’d come, and it took all my self-control not to run.
I had barely taken a step when Laurie appeared.
An overwhelming, inexplicable sense of panic raced through my body. I turned again, and suddenly Collith was there, that stubborn lock of dark hair stirring in the wind. His hazel eyes were cast in shadow, making them fathomless. Fae.
As he moved closer, my fight or flight instincts kicked in, and I felt my body tense. Collith saw it and stopped instantly. He didn’t speak, and neither did Laurie. They watched me silently.
“What are you afraid of, Fortuna?” Collith asked. His voice was husky, as if we were in the middle of an intimate conversation, rather than the start of one.
Once, I would’ve had a snarky response for him. I would’ve told him I wasn’t afraid of anything. But that would be a lie—it turned out, I had a lot of fears. The more I allowed Collith and Laurie in, the more I had to be afraid of.
I shook my head as though I could banish the feeling inside me … but I knew there was only one way to be free of fear. Only one way to break free of the cage we’d put ourselves in.
So I looked at Collith and Laurie and asked them, “What if we don’t survive this? Or even worse … what if we do?”
The question was barely more than a whisper.
For a moment, Collith and Laurie just looked at me.
The trees around us were still, as if a hush had fallen upon them.
It felt like I’d stripped myself naked, and now I was standing there with all my secrets spilled on the ground between us.
While I waited for one of them to answer, I kept fighting the impulse to bolt.
After another moment, Collith dared to draw closer. He reached up slowly, and his cool fingertips were a whisper against my skin as he cradled my cheek. His earthy, masculine scent reached me, comforting and alluring all at once.
“Dear heart,” he murmured, “haven’t we proven yet that you can’t drive us away?”
My hand rose of its own volition, and I held it over Collith’s. He knew. Of course he knew why I was so desperate to avoid this, avoid them. Every choice I made led us closer and closer to some sort of conclusion, an inevitable choice, and I was terrified of losing this.
Laurie’s voice whispered through my head. Cowards die many times before their deaths. The valiant never taste of death but once.
Finally, I looked at them both and said, “Yes.”
Laurie didn’t move, but Collith did. His long fingers grasped my neck, and he pulled me against him.
I tipped my head back, hungry for his kiss.
Collith was hungry, too. Heat coiled in my belly when I finally tasted him again after so much time apart.
I’d missed this, I thought faintly. I’d missed him.
I reached up and buried my fingers in his hair while Collith’s hands slid down my arms, gripping them above my elbows.
Then he propelled me backward, never breaking our kiss.
I felt my spine press against a wide, solid tree trunk at the same moment Collith got down on his knees.
When he undid the button on my jeans and tugged them down, along with my underwear, every thought left my head.
Collith’s gaze met mine, and he blew across my already-damp sex, teasing.
Tantalizing. I bit my lip as he left a trail of lingering kisses toward the apex of my thighs.
Just when I was on the verge of begging, Collith sealed his mouth to me. He used the very tip of his tongue, flicking my clit over and over until I was moaning and saying his name. I clutched at Collith’s lush, dark hair as if I were sinking.
Then … he stopped. I opened my eyes and saw that Collith’s mouth still hovered near my folds.
I could feel the faint touch of his breath, but he’d pulled back.
My core was throbbing and my heart was a wild thing in my chest. I followed Collith’s gaze, breathless.
When I turned my head, a soft quake of awareness went through me.
Laurie’s arm rested above my head, and his face was a whisper away from mine.
We were almost in the exact same position we’d been in earlier, in the kitchen.
Except this time, Laurie didn’t walk away.
His eyes gleamed. He was enjoying this, I thought in a daze.
I wanted to wipe that smirk off his face.
I reached for him, and my fingers collided with his massive, hard cock. Laurie’s expression intensified, and his gaze dropped to my lips.
“I want to watch you come,” he whispered.
“As do I,” Collith growled. I looked down again, and he gave me a crooked grin. In that instant, I saw a glimpse of the person he’d been before. The playful, wicked side that had been buried underneath so much pain and darkness.
Before I could utter a sound, Collith bent his head and fully claimed my clitoris, sucking on it mercilessly.
I bit my lip to contain all the sounds I wanted to make, then turned to Laurie again.
His mouth came down on mine. It was too much pleasure all at once.
I climaxed within seconds, uttering a jagged cry.
My hips jerked with such force that I felt Collith’s teeth scrape against the smooth skin of my mound.
Laurie held me while my legs trembled. He gently lowered me to the ground.
Collith removed the rest of my clothes while Laurie undressed, too.
His perfect, naked body gleamed in the moonlight as he moved to join us.
Once again, I gave myself over to both of them like it was our last night on Earth, because it probably was.
They kissed me. They kissed each other. Then Laurie and I undressed Collith together.
Once I’d had a chance to familiarize myself with every inch of him again, I pushed Collith onto his back, intending to give him the same pleasure he’d given me.
He stroked the sides of my face gently, looking at me with tenderness as I moved away.
That tenderness quickly turned to ecstasy when I drove my lips down to the very base of him.
Collith let out a sound that sent another burst of heat through my core.
I continued my administrations, torturing Collith by skimming my tongue along the crown of his cock.
I was dimly aware of Laurie kneeling behind me.
His fingers fanned out over my hips. Realizing what he wanted, I spread my legs slightly wider and arched my back.
A moan escaped me as Laurie slowly pushed his long erection inside, inch by inch.
“Finally,” he sighed. The reverence in his voice made my toes curl.
While I brought Collith to the brink with my mouth, Laurie plunged into my wet depths.
He moved his hips with that sensual skill I hadn’t stopped thinking about since the last night we’d spent together.
My fingers dug in the mossy ground just as Collith’s wild cry echoed through the night.
I felt how the sound affected Laurie, and his rhythm quickened.
Afterward, when all of us were sweaty and spent, still breathing hard from our efforts, Collith’s hard body pressed against me from behind.
I tucked my arms around Laurie, who lay in front of me, his forehead resting on mine.
The night around us was cold, but the small place we’d made was warm. Part of me wanted to stay here forever.
I could already feel myself returning to reality, though. We needed to go back to the loft in case there were any developments from our allies. There were more tomes I needed to skim, since I still hadn’t figured out what the last symbol on Michael’s message meant.
I reluctantly turned my head to say something to Collith. Before I could say a word, his tongue claimed mine again. His kiss was deep, rough, and thorough. Within seconds, I felt his cock harden against me.
“Collith,” I breathed, “I think we should—”
“For once in your life, Fortuna, stop worrying about should or shouldn’t,” Laurie whispered, his fingers stealing between my legs.
And then I didn’t think again for a long, long time.