Chapter 7
Chapter Seven
Evander
When would this dinner be fucking over?
Mom’s cooking was delicious. We were packed around a table that had seemed so much bigger when I was younger. Dad had given me a nod, but Mom had taken over after introductions were made with Violet.
“So, what do you do, dear?” Mom shoved the mashed potatoes closer to me.
I took a second helping. Mom made damn good mashed potatoes.
“I’m a chemist, analytical mostly, but I’ve done some organic work, and it’s what I got my master’s in.”
Dad sat straighter. Hell, I did too. I had thought Violet might be cunning, trying to fool me. But she was legitimately smart. Dad had always been awed by smart people. Probably why he deferred to Cameron and got frustrated with me. “Say, that’s impressive.”
She shrugged. “Thanks. Chemistry works for me because I can see it in images in my head, how the molecules go together and bond. It helps that I had a lot of 3D models to play with. If you asked me about investment funds and retirement plans, I’d be lost. I almost failed all my history courses.”
“You must have an interesting job,” Mom gushed.
Violet’s expression froze. “I… It was—it is okay.”
I shoved my fork into some potatoes and rested my free hand on her thigh.
Christ, I forgot she was wearing shorts. Warm, silky skin glided under my palm.
She gave me a grateful smile, but a pink tint lit her cheeks. “I developed, uh, develop novel fluorescent dyes that are used in flow cytometry.” My parents stared at her, and I stroked her thigh to encourage her to continue. Her muscles flexed under my touch. “It’s a procedure that counts lots of little particles or cells in a fluid.” She shrugged again. She did that a lot when it came to her job. “I liked it, but I’m ready for a change.”
I continued brushing my hand up and down her leg. She was doing fine, but I wasn’t removing it. I stuffed another forkful of potatoes in my mouth.
“Can’t retire yet though?” Dad said, his tone cynical. “Like Evander here.”
I bristled. Why did he always make my accomplishments seem subpar? I could stay in my pajamas all day and make a full-time wage. My take-home pay wasn’t high, and to be totally comfortable, I’d like to add a part-time income. But I was forty-four and retired.
“Not bad for a dumb grunt.” I stabbed the last hunk of elk on my plate.
Violet blinked at me. “Why would you say that? Dumb grunt? ”
“I was infantry.”
She cocked her head, confusion still in her eyes.
“They call infantry grunts, and since that MOS—uh, job—doesn’t need high test scores—dumb grunt.”
Her brows drew together. “I don’t like that one bit.”
The spark of warmth in my blood was a new sensation. “It’s one of those inside jokes. We can make it, but if anyone outside of the military tries to, then it’s insulting.”
She chuckled, and her thigh muscles relaxed under my hand. “I guess that’s different than science humor.”
“I wouldn’t know. I don’t have a sense of humor.”
“You are very serious.”
My lips twitched.
The weight of my parents’ attention registered. Mom wasn’t bothering to hide her grin. Dad’s expression was unreadable.
Self-consciousness itched up my shoulders. I’d been flirting with Violet in front of them, and it wasn’t for show. I tucked my chin down and kept eating. The girl would burrow so far under my skin I’d never be able to forget her, which was exactly what I needed to do if that baby wasn’t mine.
But what if we had something real?
I flicked the thought away. If she set out to deceive me, then she would be out of my life for good.
Besides, she was too smart to stay with a guy like me.
“I hear your pumpkins are growing well,” Dad said gruffly. His fluffy white mustache made him appear more like the diabetes and oatmeal guy I’d grown up seeing on commercials.
“Yeah, it’s looking like a good crop. Could do with more rain. ”
Dad grunted his agreement. “You gotta plan in mind if it doesn’t? Pumpkins need a lot of water.”
“Yep,” was all I said.
Dad’s grip on his fork tightened. He was the expert in growing things, and he wanted me to know it. “You’ve gotta have a plan.”
“I said I did.” I was researching irrigation techniques. I hadn’t gotten to the rank I had because I was an idiot, even if I was a dumb grunt.
Dad’s jaw worked. “Isla said you’re growing ten acres of pie pumpkins for her?”
“I’m overshooting it in case the crop doesn’t have the yield she needs.” The rest would be easy enough to sell or give away. Farmers’ markets, food pantries, pumpkin patches, even the nearest pigpen. Extra produce wouldn’t go to waste.
“Then what did you plant in the rest of the field? Doesn’t that property have twenty acres?”
My inclination was not to answer. He wouldn’t like my response. “Nothing.”
His brows dropped, and his attention was on his plate. “Been thinking over what we talked about?”
“I told you no.”
“It’s not like it was,” Dad said quietly.
“Does Stetson tell you what to plant, when to work cattle, what you’re going to raise, and then take a generous cut?” I tired of this argument whenever I was with Dad. My cousin was fair, but I’d been bossed around my entire life. I didn’t retire after twenty-six years in the army to lose my freedom to my family. Again.
“He’s a fair man.”
“I didn’t say he wasn’t.” I put my fork down. “I didn’t come to get more reminders about why I’m not good enough to get any part of the Barron empire.”
Red crept up Dad’s face. He might’ve mellowed out over the years, but this topic was an instant trigger for him. And if there was one thing I was good at, it was aiming dead center of the target.
“That wasn’t my decision,” Dad gritted out.
The fuck it wasn’t. He hadn’t put up a fight. I had, and that was against family rules. No one argued with my grandfather about his totalitarian ways. He preached about respect, but he’d never shown it. I had called him on it several times, and he’d cut me out of his will. “And now?”
“It’s all under one umbrella, Evander.”
“Have you asked if it can be divided?”
“Have you decided to stay and take over?” he countered.
Frustration tore through my patience, shredding it like tissue paper. I scooted my chair back, and Mom let out a startled gasp.
“I have dessert,” she said, her tone frantic.
“Sorry, Mom.” I rose and helped a stunned Violet stand. “I’m not going over the same fight that’s going to lead to the same bullshit insults.”
Dad slammed his hand on the table. “I never insulted you.”
“What about after Derek’s funeral?”
Silence descended. Violet’s head swung from my dad to me, her blue eyes fraught.
Dad couldn’t meet my gaze. “I apologized for that.”
“Yeah. You did.” Didn’t mend the damage done.
I nodded to Mom, barely meeting her stricken gaze. One more disappointment added to many I’d given her. I cupped Violet’s elbow and led her out the door. My parents didn’t chase us outside. They let me go like they always did.
The summer sun was still high and bright in the sky. I squinted against the glare and tried to keep from dragging her across the gravel to my pickup. Why did I expect tonight to turn out differently than before? I wasn’t changing my behavior because of Violet. Perhaps it was best for her to see that giving birth to a kid in the Barron family didn’t mean a damn thing.
I helped Violet into the passenger seat. She was buckled by the time I got in. I skidded down the drive before yanking my own seat belt across my body. Dirt kicked up behind me, thanks to the fucking lack of rain.
My hand was still clenched around the wheel when I turned down the long driveway to my place. Our route from my parents was like tracing a big square. In one direction was Liam and Kennedy’s place. Go the other direction, and it went past this place.
Hell, maybe it was part of why I rented it. Close enough to say “fuck you” to everyone who thought I should settle for getting treated like a disgruntled employee.
The trip was quiet like usual, only this time discomfort radiated from my pretty passenger. Fuck if I knew what to do about it. I parked in front of the door so Violet wouldn’t have to traverse over the uneven lawn to the porch.
Her hands were clutched on her lap. “That was intense.”
Despite my guilt for putting her through that, I almost laughed. “It’s like that.”
“Every time? ”
I nodded. Enclosed in the cab of the truck, with her wildflower smell surrounding me, I could pretend the dinner wasn’t my special Groundhog Day hell. Except for the one memory that was on a loop in my head. “I found him almost catatonic after Derek’s funeral. He kept saying Derek’s death was a senseless waste.” I ran my thumb and forefinger over my lower lip. “He said he feared for my life when I was deployed, but at least I fought for something. Then he, uh…” I had to clear my throat to get past the block in my windpipe. “He said, ‘Isn’t that funny? All along, I’ve been prepared to hear you’ve been killed, and sometimes I wondered if I’d even notice the difference.’”
I swallowed hard. The memory never failed to clog up every emotion I had. Derek had been their baby, and I’d never faulted my brother for it. He hadn’t needed to put up with the bullshit I did. But to hear that I was almost nothing to Dad—after they’d lost one son already? Fuck me. My chest ached.
Her hand was on my hand. At some point, she’d unbuckled and twisted in her seat. “I’m so sorry, Evander. That’s awful.”
She was leaning as far over the console as she could. I’d never told anyone that. The only time I brought it up was to throw it in Dad’s face. But I’d never repeated the words. I soaked up her comforting presence.
“You know why I joined the army?” I should shut the hell up, but in a way, she had to know more than anyone. If she was trying to cheat me, there wasn’t much there. I had my retirement and little else. But if she was living off hers, then I still came out ahead. She needed money, and I was a target. I’d have to show her that she should’ve picked a different baby daddy. “My grandparents had a lot of oil money. We have wells on our land, and my grandfather was behind the refinery. It’s why they can’t sell out until Cameron retires. Each grandkid got a trust worth millions that they received on their twenty-fifth birthday. Stetson and Holden built houses and eventually bought their own land. Isla started Reservoir Barrel. Nora opened a couple of coffee shops. Derek’s is going to Liam and Kennedy’s kids. You know what happened to mine?”
She shook her head. Her touch was a balm, but it did nothing against the sweltering rage building like a storm cloud behind my eyes.
“Nothing. I didn’t get one. I argued too much. I wasn’t the obedient oldest, and it was almost like it was a punishment to have the audacity to be born before Cameron’s first kid. And you know what sucks? No one knows. My cousins have made comments about me not using the trust fund money. ‘You don’t have to gut out twenty years when you’re a millionaire already.’ No one knows.” I shook my head. Telling them would’ve made me feel even more pathetic. “Fuck ’em all.” I captured her bright gaze. “But I thought you should know. If you came to get money out of me, there’s nothing there.”
Stunned sympathy morphed into instant hurt. “How could you think— Why would I—” Anger sparked in the blue depths of her eyes. “Well,” she said sarcastically, her tone a whip to my conscience, “it’s a good thing you didn’t get your grandma’s jewelry. I heard it’s not safe around me.”
She jumped out of the pickup.
Shit. She was getting away, and that notion flushed panic through my blood like a smoke bomb. “Violet.”
She slammed the passenger door.
I scrambled out, almost tangling myself in the seat belt. She was marching up the creaky stairs by the time my boots hit the dirt. Her ass was wiggling in the most delicious way, but I had no time to stop and admire.
“Violet, dammit.”
She charged into the house. Why didn’t I lock the damn door?
I rushed behind her. She beelined into the bathroom and started rummaging around, tossing her toothbrush and toothpaste into her toiletry bag.
“You can’t leave. We haven’t done the test yet.”
“I don’t care.” She stuffed a hand through her hair, and some curls fell back into her eyes. “You know what I was most worried about? You missing out on time with this kid because I couldn’t find you.” She zipped her bag so hard the whole zipper should’ve torn off. “But it’s clear you think I’m nothing but a crook. What I can’t figure out”—she bunched the fingertips on one hand together and poked at the middle of her forehead—“is what you think I’m after. I can get a job for seventy thousand with benefits. I can build my retirement back, no problem. All my student loans are paid off. Just what do you think I’m after?”
The words “I’m sorry” danced on my tongue, but I didn’t say them. I hadn’t wanted to hurt her feelings, but I had to protect myself. I wasn’t getting used again. “You want this house.”
She shoved past me and went into the bedroom. “It’s not worth it.” She hauled her suitcase to the bed and threw it on top. “I can go anywhere. I can probably get a job anywhere there’s an oil refinery. That opens up a ton of states. Minneapolis has all types of labs. I can go there.” She clamped her lips together like it was the last thing she wanted to do .
Good. Minneapolis was too goddamn far away. “You don’t have to go.”
“I’m not staying where I’m treated like I’m going to pick your pocket. It’s a baby . My two concerns are taking care of it and myself.” She kept trying to fit her toiletry bag inside her suitcase, but it tumbled out once, twice, three times. She let out an enraged snarl. “The bag can fuck right off, and so can you.”
I had meant to make a point, but I’d pissed her the hell off. Would she leave like this if I wasn’t the dad? “We have to take the test together.”
“I said you don’t need to be involved.” She started zipping her luggage with half the toiletry bag sticking out.
“I’m not abandoning my kid.”
“‘I’m not abandoning my kid,’” she mocked in a deep voice. “If I wanted to get treated like what I want doesn’t matter, I would’ve stayed in California.”
I gently gripped her arm and urged her to turn toward me. She finally obliged. “I hope you aren’t comparing me to that sniveling idiot who couldn’t find his way out of a paper bag.”
She stabbed a finger in the air. “You both accused me of trying to steal from you. I’m not having this kid exposed to a guy who thinks I’m?—”
I kissed her, pulling her in tight and silencing her tirade with my mouth. I didn’t want her to finish whatever that was. I had every right to be suspicious, but this woman managed to turn my entire world upside down. She made me want things I’d given up long ago. She made me think that maybe I should stick around somewhere, with someone.
I swiped my tongue against her lips, and she opened for me. She didn’t shove me off, and she didn’t pound at my chest. Instead, she fisted her hands in my shirt like she was afraid I’d be the one pushing her away.
When I licked my tongue against hers, a little whimper left her like she’d been wanting this, needing it. I sure as fuck did. The real woman in my arms was better than the memory of her when I was in the shower.
I ran a hand down her back, dipped in at her waist, and finally palmed that round ass I’d been obsessing over. Arousal built in my veins, clouding my thinking and blocking out the whole evening.
She groaned and skimmed her hands over my shoulders and hooked them around my neck.
I devoured her mouth, tasting the dinner we’d just had mixed with her own sweet flavor. It’d been too fucking long since I’d had her last. But I was content to taste her, licking and nibbling along her mouth, then down her long neck.
She tipped her head back. “Evander, you are so damn good with that mouth.”
Fuck yeah, I was.
I pushed her to the edge of the bed. I was about to tumble her back and come down on top of her when I remembered the suitcase.
She was leaving.
She was leaving because I insulted her.
I insulted her because I didn’t trust her.
She needed to stay. I had to figure this shit out. I had to know. Was Violet Duke everything she seemed?
I ditched her collarbone and rested my forehead against hers. “Don’t go. I was an ass.”
“You’ve been an ass for days.”
“I’ve been an ass my entire life.”
She caressed my cheek. “You’ve been hurt. I know you don’t trust me. I accept that. But my days of tolerating disrespect are done.”
Chagrin doused some of my desire. We were still touching. I looked down the slope of her nose to her puffy red lips. I ran my thumb along the bottom one. “I’m sorry you missed Mom’s dessert.”
“It’s fine. I was gutting through the elk.”
I pulled back with a frown. How did I not notice she wasn’t enjoying her meal?
I had been wrapped up in myself.
“Do you need something else to eat?” I did a quick log of my fridge. She’d bought her own food, and it wasn’t like we sat at the table for meals. “We could go to town.”
“No. My stomach’s fine; it’s more mental. Food outside my usual upsets my hormones.” She dropped her arms from around my neck to my biceps. I restrained myself from hooking them back in place. “I just want to cuddle the cats and read a book.”
My hands were still on her ass. The dark circles had made a return at some time today. From the stress of dinner? I should’ve known better. Mom meant well, but Dad and I couldn’t stay off each other’s throats. “So you’re staying?”
She peered into my eyes for several moments. “Yeah. And you are too.”
I was lost.
“The house. Renew your lease. I’m not stopping you. You’re better for this place than I’ll ever be, and…I just don’t feel right.”
My heart twisted at the thought that one day, she wouldn’t be under this roof with me. “Where will you go? ”
“Where I get a job, but I’d like to stay in this part of the state or go home. To Montana.”
Montana was not her fucking home. She was born and almost fully raised in Coal Haven. But she’d been gone almost as long as me. Yet she and I were standing in the same room in Coal Haven, not far from where each of us had lived. “You can stay,” I said, my voice thick. “For as long as you need to find a job. If we get the results and you haven’t been hired, you don’t have to leave.” I wouldn’t kick a pregnant woman out. She might have family nearby, but after insulting her earlier, I wanted to redeem myself. I wasn’t a selfish piece of shit.
She smiled, and damn, I loved the pleased look in her eyes. “If you can put up with me for that long.”
I was afraid I could put up with her for a lot longer. Forever was starting to feel too short.