Chapter 30
Chapter
Thirty
By the time all the dairy is churned, strained, and boiled, I’m exhausted. I fall asleep on my cot, too tired to go and fetch Kalos from the field. I rouse from a nap, my arms sore, and roll over in bed…only to find my nose pressed against a warm chest.
“You smell strange,” Kalos murmurs.
“Hello to you, too.” I fight back a yawn. “You smell like goats.”
“They really are the most fascinating, happy little creatures,” he muses.
His arms are around me, and he strokes his fingers over my back through my clothing.
I’m not sure why he’s being so very cuddly this morning, but I’ll take it.
It’s nice to be touched, nice to be held close and feel warm and protected.
I lean in, reluctant to leave the circle of his arms. “Is it morning? I should probably get up.”
“You can stay for a bit. I’ll just growl at the monk if he comes this way.”
I smile, eyes closed, and snuggle in a little closer. “You’re in a playful mood.”
“Because I want to stay in bed and while the day away? I think that’s more like me than you realize.” His fingers dance along my spine, moving up my back. “There’s nothing wrong with being lazy.”
That makes me shake some of the sleep off. I have plans that need to be enacted. Plans that make me excited. Plans that don’t involve lazing the day about in bed, no matter how cuddly he might be acting. “Are you trying to distract me?”
“Me? Never. Maybe I just wanted to hold you close for a while.” His hand strays to my lower back, then…even lower. “What’s so wrong with that?”
I’m surprised when he grabs my ass. I’m even more surprised when he gives it a squeeze, his fingers digging into my skin. Heat curls through my body, followed by distrust. I pry myself out of his arms and sit up, eyeing him skeptically. “What’s going on?”
Kalos gives me a lazy grin, sliding a hand behind his head. “What makes you think something is going on? I can’t hold you a little while you sleep?”
His smile is utterly disarming, and it puts my senses on red alert even as my stomach flutters. I glance around the monastery, flustered. “Where’s Omos?”
“Out tending to the goats. Or the beehives. Something. I told him we needed some time alone and to make himself scarce.” He trails a finger on the bedding. “Come back to bed.”
I spring out of the cot as if it’s on fire. Taking a few steps back, I search the nearby surroundings for a weapon. “You’re not Kalos.”
“I assure you, I am.” He doesn’t get up. One foot dangles off the side of the cot and flexes absently. “Who else would I be?”
“I don’t know!”
“You look good sleep-tousled,” he all but purrs. “And I like that gown on you. You should wear it all the time. I can see your pretty nipples through the linen.”
My what? He can what?
Why are his words such a turn on? Damn it!
Kalos’s green eyes are sleepy with arousal, and I’m tempted to get back into the bed with him.
Tempted. I haven’t stopped thinking about the hungry kiss he gave me back when he freed me from Seth’s dungeon…
but this feels different. Kalos isn’t normally this blatant.
I eye him. From his shirt, which is open to the waist and seems like an invitation, to the bare feet that dangle just out from under the blankets.
As I watch him, he reaches down and adjusts a very prominently outlined cock through his clothing.
My mouth goes dry.
He just smiles.
“Are you…okay?” I lick my lips, and it takes everything I have to pull my gaze from that hypnotic length.
“I could be better.” He strokes his length again.
I put a finger up. “Hold that thought. I need to talk to Omos.”
With a heavy sigh, he flops back into the bed dramatically. “Always with the monk. Do I need to fight him for your attention?”
“What? No! He’s literally a monk.” I shake my head at Kalos. “And you’re not being yourself. I don’t know what this is, but it’s not you.”
“Why, because I’m attracted to you?” He curls one arm under his head, looking sleepy and tousled and sexy.
I flinch, because that stings. Is that what’s happening? Is that why he never pursues a relationship with me? Never follows up after a kiss?
Because he’s not attracted?
I know he finds mortal foods disgusting. What must he think of mortal…me?
Shaking my head, I put my finger up again, indicating he needs to wait, and grab my cloak from the peg by the door.
I race outside, looking frantically for the monk.
Something weird has happened to Kalos and I’m freaking out.
My heart pounds as I head to the goat pen, searching for a familiar bald pate. “Omos?”
The monk’s head pops up from the herd of goats. “Just milking. What do you need, Elsie?”
I point back into the monastery, clutching the cloak closed with my other hand so Omos doesn’t see my pretty nipples. “Something’s wrong with Kalos!”
The expression on his face turns uncomfortable. “Ah, yes, I had noticed a change in his disposition this morning.”
I race to his side, frantic. “Is he okay? What do we do? How do we fix it?”
Omos avoids eye contact. “If I were to speculate, I would say that yet another one of his Aspects has been destroyed.”
Of course. I put my hand over my face, stifling a groan. It all makes sense now…and I can just guess which particular Aspect this is. Kalos is horny because he’s been taken over by Hedonism. His attraction to me is not real.
I don’t know if I’m crushed or relieved or horrified. Can I be a mix of all three? “What do we do?”
The monk picks up his milking bucket and gives me a puzzled look. “Do? What is there to do?”
“But…”
“I am not your father, my dear. You are an adult. You can choose to be with him if you see fit. You will find no judgment from me.”
That…that’s not what I’m asking. My face feels scalding hot. “So…what? We just wait this out and hope he goes back to normal?”
“If you like.”
“How long will that take?”
“I am as new to this as you are, Elsie. I will read up when the chores are done, though.”
Frustrated, I cross my arms over my chest and stare at the walls of the monastery. I’m not going to be able to get anything done today. Not with Kalos being…cuddly. Lusty.
And me being attracted to it.
Perhaps that’s the part that insults me the most—that it’s one sided. That he’ll flirt and snuggle and make it obvious that he wants to do more…but it’s only because of what’s happened. It was never his decision in the first place.
I head back inside, wary. Kalos sits in bed, holding my pillow against his front as if it’s a lover. He smiles when I enter and pats the blankets in welcome.
I drag a wooden stool over and park it a few feet away from the bed. “We need to talk.”
“Talk,” he purrs. “I’m listening.”
Uh huh. This feels a bit like a trap of some kind. I clasp my hands in my lap and put on my best “serious business” expression. I’m not sure how he’s going to take the news, but I hope it doesn’t upset him too much. “I think one of your Aspects has died.”
He lifts one shoulder in the most careless shrug. “I noticed.”
That takes me aback. “You knew?”
“For the first time since I arrived on this hellish mortal landscape, I am not filled with yawning despair and fatigue. Instead, I am now randy and full of despair. It’s an improvement.” He gives me a dazzling smile.
Me, I just feel like the biggest ass in the world. Apathy must truly be the worst of the curses to have, and here I am lecturing him that he’s been a little overly randy this morning. “I’m sorry every day is so difficult for you. I wish I could help.”
“You do help. In fact, you’re the only bright spot.”
“You’re just saying that.”
He cocks one silvery eyebrow. “Am I? Or is it just easier to say now? That doesn’t make it untrue. Just…easier.”
Kalos gives me a wolfish grin that I don’t entirely trust. I’m not sure what to think of this and his new attitude.
Part of me loves that he’s feeling better than he usually does, and part of me is sad for him because what a fucking nightmare the last few months must have been.
But I worry that things are getting a little more drastic.
If two of his Aspects are gone, only one other one remains.
If Hedonism and Arrogance are gone, Lies is bound to come after us. “So…what now? What do we do?”
He looks me up and down with slow, thorough pleasure. “I nibble on all your pretty parts until you scream.”
My face floods with heat. “I didn’t mean sex! I meant—”
“I don’t see why not. Are you saving yourself for someone? I can assure you that I am not.”
“That is not the point! I meant what are we going to do about your other Aspect?”
But Kalos eyes me with consideration. “Are you a virgin?”
I sputter. “What? No! That doesn’t have anything to do with anything—”
“Not a virgin, not saving yourself for marriage…why wouldn’t you want to have sex with me? I assure you I’ll make it good. Better than good. I have centuries upon centuries of experience.”
“We’re not having sex.”
“It’s not a big deal. Sex is just two bodies grunting against one another until both feel delicious. Why so uptight over it?”
Uptight? “Because it’ll change things between us.”
“Will it? Is that such a bad thing?” Kalos traces his finger on the blankets. It’s an obvious invitation, and my skin prickles in response. “Were you completely satisfied with where we were? You haven’t wanted more?”
My protest dies in my throat. Haven’t I been wondering what he thinks? Why he’s never made a move? After he rescued me from Seth, it was like a switch got flipped between us. “You…you never kissed me again. After that time.”
This time, his smile is apologetic. “I’m Apathy, my darling dearest. It’s hard for me to do anything I want to do. It’s hard for me to make it through every day.” He glances down at his cock and gives me a coy grin. “And now I’m just hard.”
“So…now that you’re feeling better, we just have loads of crazy sex?”
“Why not?”