Chapter 45 #3
None of us sleep well, except Loch with his modified earplugs. Elska’s constant pacing is beyond unsettling. Every whine causes a shudder to ripple down my spine, and I know I’m not alone.
Benny’s body is so tense I’m sure he’s contemplated the same thought I had earlier: just because Kyor didn’t murder him in Galreck, it doesn’t mean the wolf isn’t going to rip his throat out at some point.
That thought doesn’t help me sleep either. If she does decide that killing Benny is going to go some way to easing this pain she’s under, I need to be awake to stop that from happening.
At some point in the night, after a couple of hours of restless tossing, my ears tune into Ruben’s voice.
‘Let me take watch, buddy. You need some sleep.’ Confusion flickers in my drowsy state. I thought Benny had already taken his shift, and I can’t imagine who else Ruben would refer to like that.
But then the second voice replies sharply, ‘One, you and I aren’t buddies, and two, I’m fine.’ The brittleness in Kyor’s voice would be enough to make anyone slink back, and yet I’m not in the slightest bit surprised when Ruben stands his ground.
‘One, maybe not right now, but we will be. And two, you’re not fine. You’re in pain, and you’re exhausted. If you don’t rest, you’re not going to help any of us. Not Rose. Not Elska.’
Kyor grunts, but he doesn’t respond.
‘Just half an hour,’ Ruben presses. ‘If you’re not asleep, then you can take the watch back.’
Another pause follows before a low grunt rattles through the quiet.
‘Fine, thirty minutes.’
When the weak, filtered morning light reaches us through the canopy, I stretch out, feeling even less rested than I did before I went to sleep.
I can’t have got more than a couple of hours at best. Yet as I roll over, a deep wave of gratitude floods through me.
Kyor is there, asleep by the fire, and Ruben is rubbing his eyes as he remains in watch position.
Thank you, I mouth to him, only for him to shrug like it’s nothing. But it’s not nothing. Not to me and not to Kyor either. I know the prince well enough for that.
‘We should stick by the river,’ Thessa says as we pack our belongings and mount the horses.
‘Oh now you’re giving us directions,’ Caz teases.
Thessa laughs, and I realise it’s the first time I’ve heard her make such a sound. I could have easily believed that Sanrott didn’t just take their magic from them, but also their ability for joy. Caz catches my gaze, and the glimmer in her eyes is enough to warm my heart.
‘Not directions,’ Thessa continues, ‘but if the tide is good, we’ll be able to fish in the river.’
At Thessa’s behest, we point our horses towards the wide river. I have no idea what counts as a ‘good’ tide, but what we find is a fairly low level of water, little more than hip deep, and Thessa seems pleased.
The water is clear and we can see the rocky riverbed below.
Although it’s barely been an hour since we started up, we drop from our horses and tether them to nearby trees, ready to follow the Sannings’ instructions.
‘So … how did you say we do this?’ Caz asks Thessa with more than a hint of excitement in her voice. ‘You need us all in the water, right?’
‘Yes. The cold will hurt, but it’ll be worth it. But only step on the rocks, you hear? Only rocks. If you step into the mud—’
A wave of fear and panic hits me so hard that it steals the air from my lungs.
‘The Rose?’ Stide speaks behind me, but her voice barely registers.
I need to flee. I need to leave here. I have to get out, but I can’t. I can’t.
This is my end. The miserable thought rattles over and over in my head. This is my end. Stuck here.
‘Rose.’
The shake on my arm is just like the one that pulls me from my nightmares, and yet this time it has no effect.
Because this isn’t a nightmare.
These feelings, that inability to escape … I’ve felt something remarkably like it before.
With the kraken in the fourth trial.
The fear is so overwhelming that it threatens to consume me entirely. But whose fear? The feeling surges again, and my knees buckle, but Kyor’s there, catching me before I can fall.
‘Rose?’ he asks. ‘Rose, what is it?’
‘He’s so afraid,’ I blurt, and I’m shocked to feel tears slip from my eyes. ‘He doesn’t want to die.’
And he is a he. I know it, though I have no idea how I know it.
‘Who?’ Kyor asks. ‘Who’s doing this to you?’
I shake my head and dash the tears streaming from my eyes. This isn’t his fault. He doesn’t want this. He doesn’t want to die.
Forcing myself to my feet, my gaze drifts upriver. And I’m not alone. Both Elska and Loch are frozen, their attention fixed on the same point.
With the rest of the group stopped by my panic, they follow the direction of our gazes.
‘Is that …’ Benny whispers, his sight picking out what’s there before the others can.
‘By all the Gods,’ Kyor murmurs back, his voice trembling in shock and horror. Without a word or a glance in my direction, he releases me from his grip, and before I can utter another word, he and Elska are sprinting, an unexpected name on his disbelieving lips.
‘Fen!’