43. Octavia
OCTAVIA
Nathan got home from practice, wrapped his arms around Octavia from behind while she sat at her dining table surrounded by law textbooks, and told her he had been suspended for a week from the team.
“How the hell do you get suspended during a practice?” she asked, turning in her chair to face him.
“First step is to physically threaten a teammate. Apparently it doesn’t matter if the guy is a sexual predator.
Then you’ll want to snap on your teammates who can’t make eye contact with you.
Lastly, you’ll definitely need to tell the general manager to go fuck himself for allowing the predator into the fucking building. ”
She stared at him for a few silent seconds. “Yeah, I guess I can see how that would end in a suspension. Was it worth it?”
His hard stare burned into her before he nodded. “Hell, yes!”
“Then good. I’m glad you did it. Well, maybe not the physical assault, that may not end well.”
Nathan scoffed. “I just shoved him up against the locker. I wanted to punch him and not stop, but he’s only going to have a bruised ego.”
“Still, I hope this doesn’t come back on you.”
He shrugged. “Then it comes back on me.” He sat down in the chair next to her, resting his arms on the table.
“I told you, I’ll end my career fighting for this if I have to.
But I’m starting from inside the locker room.
Had I intended to start the fire today? No, but I didn’t realize that piece of shit was going to strut into the room as if he’d done nothing wrong. ”
“Pretty on brand way to walk in after being accused of sexual assault though, no?”
“Sadly, yes.” He leaned back and withdrew his phone from his pocket, tapping and scrolling before passing it to Octavia. “I also got connected with someone who is a nonprofit consultant. He’s one of the trainer’s brothers and said he’d be interested in chatting whenever we’re ready.”
Octavia read through the email he received from Adam before he left the rink and smiled.
“I’ve heard of this guy. He’s had his hand in some of the best run charities in the city. He works closely with one of the women’s shelters my friend does pro bono for.”
“Shannon mentioned that he got involved with this stuff after a friend in university had been involved in something horrific. I don’t know what but clearly it left an impression.”
Between Nathan’s news and the email, Octavia realized she wasn’t going to be able to focus much more on studying, so she started to pack up. Once her books were stacked neatly at the end of the table she held her hand out to him.
“I need to shut my brain down, do you want to watch a stupid movie or something?”
There was an expectation that he’d suggest something more physical, but he just nodded and let her lead him to the living room.
“Pick something and I’ll grab some water.”
“Do we still have ketchup chips?” he asked before she was out of the room.
Warmth spread through her chest at the use of we. They’d come a long way from that first night. The woman who wouldn’t dare date a hockey player. The man who never spent the night in someone else’s bed.
“We do,” she confirmed.
Four Months Later
Nathan sat in the makeup chair fidgeting so much that Octavia reached out and took his hands. He smiled up at her, running his thumb over the back of her fingers, giving her left ring finger a bit more attention than the others.
There wasn’t a ring there, not yet anyway, but he wasn’t shy about talking about how much he looked forward to sliding one on.
“You sure you want to do this?” she asked as the makeup artist removed the bib that had been protecting his crisp navy suit.
“Yes,” he assured her, his brown eyes calmer than the rest of him. “I kind of wish I insisted that we did this at the cottage.”
“I had a feeling you’d say that,” she teased. “But every time we went back you’d think about this interview and I don’t want you to have to think about it there.”
“I’m never going to stop thinking about this interview, Autumn. Thinking about how it’s something that shouldn’t be needed. Thinking about how I’m the first to do something like this. Thinking about all the things that could have been prevented if anyone had done something earlier on.”
“I know, honey.” She slid her chair closer, somehow keeping her hands from reaching out for his face.
“We can’t change the past though, no matter how badly we wish we could.
But you’re doing something that may change the future.
You’re respected in this world. Loved by teammates and fans alike.
I can’t think of anyone better to take this stand and I’m so fucking proud of you. ”
Nathan didn’t seem to have the same reservation about taking her face in his hands, his thumb dragging along her bottom lip.
“I’m only in this position because you gave me the courage to do it.
I don’t know where I’d be without you but I know I wouldn’t be here.
I’d still be behind the times. Still a silent member of the boys’ club.
Watching you take on this new role. Getting to be on a team with you.
Fuck,” he breathed out heavily, looking skyward.
“Octavia, you changed my life in a way I never could have imagined.”
Octavia wanted to keep throwing the compliments back at him but knew this would go on forever, so she let his words sink in without trying to match them with her own. He knew how she felt, she didn’t have to keep saying it in different ways.
“You’re welcome,” she said, laughing when he smiled at her.
Ten minutes later, Octavia sat off to the side of the set, watching as the man who’d been unable to sit still in the makeup chair appeared calm, cool, and collected while the interviewer introduced him.
Media training hadn’t squashed Nathan’s personality like it tended to do with so many players. No, it just grounded him.
He’s all mine, she thought, trying to hide her smile, knowing where the conversation was about to go.
Nathan was asked if he had been the anonymous player interviewed a few months ago.
He was. He was asked to expand on his answers, asked to provide real life examples of things he’d heard or been part of.
He’d reiterated that while he hadn’t ever acted like some of his teammates, he’d stayed quiet when he knew about things and that was something he’d never forgive himself for.
As for immediate actions, he revealed that several players were putting forward a motion within the league to expand the player code of conduct that was seriously lacking in areas that would prevent abusers from being able to play professionally.
In the end, they asked him if he thought change was possible. Would any other players come forward? Would more survivors? How did he feel about the players involved being placed on leave from the league?
All he could do was say he hoped change was on its way, but he couldn’t see the future.
He couldn’t even see where the Hockey Seven case was going since the trial was set for late the following year.
He also admitted that a few players had reached out to let him know they’d be interested in speaking up but had their reservations.
And if more survivors came forward, while it was hard to acknowledge there would be more, he hoped they’d be listened to and taken seriously.
As for the players, if they were found to have done any of what the survivor had claimed—and he believed her—they should be banned for life and face actual consequences for their actions.
Lastly, he was asked about his why.
Nathan looked off camera, directly at Octavia.
“My girlfriend. She had been pretty against dating a hockey player and I worked hard to show her I wasn’t like the ones she had heard rumours about.
But when it came down to it, when this case became public, I realized that I played a part regardless of whether I wanted to admit it or not.
Ultimately, I want to be the man she deserves.
The man worthy of her love. Hockey is just a game I am fortunate to be good at.
But she’s everything. She’ll be there long after hockey. ”
Octavia’s breath caught when she touched her face and realized she was crying.
“I own my actions, or lack of action, for most of my life and she gave me the courage to not only acknowledge my role, but to ensure I wasn’t complicit a minute longer.”
When the interview aired the next night, Octavia and Nathan sat on the deck at their cottage, bodies entwined on a lounge chair, ignoring the world.
“I think Scottie may be seeing someone,” Nathan murmured thoughtfully.
Octavia pushed herself up, looking down at him as if she didn’t believe him. “What makes you think that?”
“I don’t know.” He shrugged. “He’s being cagier than normal and he has this sudden interest in thunderstorms. Seriously, when I was over at his place the other day, he had an entire monitor tracking weather patterns. I know he’s a nerd but that seems out there even for him.”
“So what, you think he’s dating a meteorologist or something?” She laughed, settling back against his chest and humming contentedly as he took her in his arms.
“Could be. You know me, all I care about is that he’s happy and healthy. He seems to be both these days.”
Octavia closed her eyes, thinking back to all the Scottie updates she’d received early in their relationship.
From not being sure if he’d regain full function in his right hand and foot to frustrations over the direction life had not exactly taken him, but thrown him.
She hadn’t known Scottie before, outside of the chat box on the dating site, but it sounded like he was back to being himself.
Which was good because his family was made up of a bunch of worriers.
At the first loon call, Nathan rolled out from beneath Octavia to light the mosquito candles and then ran up to the cottage to grab them fresh glasses of iced tea.
When he came back, the late August sun had begun to dip toward the horizon, painting the sky in magnificent pinks, purples, and oranges, and she looked over to say how beautiful it was only to discover Nathan down on one knee, holding a puck wrapped in masking tape, “Her” scrawled in Sharpie just visible between his fingers.
In the center sat a simple cushion cut emerald ring.
“I know it’s fast bu—”
“Yes!” she interrupted, holding her hand out so he could slip the ring on the very finger his thumb had spent so much time dancing across yesterday.
Once the ring was securely on her finger she dragged him down to the dock, letting the rest of his proposal fade with the evening light.
Nothing about the year had gone as planned, but as Nathan kissed her senseless, Octavia realized she wouldn’t want it to have gone any other way.