Wanted

Chapter 43

Enzo

THE MOOD IS SOMbrE, FLOWERS LAY EVERYWHERE, HEADS BOWED DOWN AS mama recites a prayer. Looking around at our near and dear, red swollen eyes stare down into nothing. Elena would hate this.

Tony shifts to hold Evie as her body shakes in silent sobs. Mama finishes the prayer, cresting her chest with the mark of the cross before removing a tissue from the cuff of her sleeve to wipe her tears.

I haven’t shed a single tear. I can’t. Crying now would mean weakness; it would mean I’d have to face what happened. Face what I am… a failure. I thought I could get her out of there in time.

I almost did.

Almost.

Almost doesn’t count though, does it? Because here I am, once again surrounded by the people I care for, feeling empty and alone.

There’s only one person who can bring me comfort now; but she’s not here.

How pathetic am I? After everything she’d been through, here I am in need of comfort, aching for her touch, wishing she would just wake up and put me out of my misery.

I still can’t process how it happened. One minute she was fine in Evelyn’s arms; and then - that scream.

Evelyn’s blood curdling scream rang through that basement and my chest tightened instantly; my blood ran cold, the air knocked out of my body from the sound.

The sight of all that blood on her and Evelyn covered in crimson as she cried while crossing her hands over each other, placing them on the wound, applying pressure to try and stop the bleeding.

The images flash before my eyes… Red… so much red.

The police and the medics arrived at the same time. Elena was taken away immediately. Her limp body secured to the gurney as one of the medics took Evelyn’s place applying pressure to the wound and then, she was swiftly whisked away.

Evelyn turned to me then, burying her face in my chest, her bloody hands gripping my shirt as she begged me to tell her that her best friend would be okay.

The memory draws my attention to my shirt, still covered in blood.

Motion draws my attention to Tony as he stands up gesturing towards the doctor approaching with a white clipboard in his hand.

I meet him quickly at the entrance of the waiting room, the others shuffling behind me eager for news.

“Family of Elena Reeves?” He calls out. His expression giving nothing away.

“Yes?”

“Are you next of kin?”

“No, I – uh,” I fumble with my words. Who am I to her? I know she’s the love of my life but I don’t know what I am to her. My stomach twists at the thought.

“I’m her fiancé.” The lie comes out with ease.

“Well in that case, Mr.?”

“Marino. Lorenzo Marino.”

“Mr. Marino, Elena suffered a gunshot wound to the shoulder, more specifically below the clavicle. There was no exit point so we had to operate immediately to have the bullet removed. She suffered substantial blood loss and we feared damage to the subclavian artery. Thankfully, that was not the case.”

We collectively heave a sigh of relief.

“Thank God for that, I thought the worst when she lost consciousness so fast.”

“The loss of consciousness is normal given the amount of blood loss she incurred but it’s very possible that the stress of it all in her condition added to that.”

My eyebrows knit together.

“Her condition?”

“Yes, she’s pregnant.”

Shock hits me like a ton of bricks. What? She’s pregnant? How? When? Does she know?

“I take it you didn’t know?”

I shake my head no, backing up against the wall lest I stumble. I bring my gaze back to the man who just informed me that I am going to be a father for the second time over. And then it hits me… she was shot.

“Is, is the baby okay?”

“The baby is fine, strong heartbeat and Elena is stable. You can see her in a few hours.” He looks to everyone else as he says it. Then back to me.

“We are moving her into a room. You can stay with her until she wakes up if you like? Just you for now. One of the nurses will come looking for you once we get her settled in.”

“Thank you, Doctor, truly. Thank you for saving them both.”

He smiles, nods at us and walks out of the waiting room.

I instantly search for my mothers’ eyes and when I find them, she wastes no time taking me in her arms.

That’s when I let it happen. I break; the flood gates open and the tears fall unrestrained.

“They’re okay mama, both of them. She’s having my baby.”

“Lo so, mia cara. Sono così felice per entrambi. Un figlio è una benedizione". (I know, my dear. I’m so happy for the both of you. A child is a blessing.)

I can’t help but smile through my tears.

Tony comes up and hugs me.

“Congratulations brother, I know they’ll both be fine.” He slaps me on the back and I nod.

Evelyn comes up to me then.

“You don’t deserve her you know?”

“I know.”

“Congratulations big guy.” She smiles at me through teary eyes and then surprises me with a tight hug. I feel so much relief in this moment that I can’t help but hug her back. Slowly she pulls away from me.

“If you ever tell Ellie that happened, I will deny it.”

“I have no doubt, Evelyn.”

“As long as we understand each other.”

“Did you know?”

“About the baby?”

I nod at her.

“No, she didn’t tell me. I hate that she handled it all alone, but maybe she needed time to figure it out, you know?”

“She told me just before she passed out.”

“Enzo?’

“Yes?”

“She may be having your baby, but just prepare yourself. She won’t be easily won over.

You hurt her. I’m not saying this to be mean.

Believe it or not I want you two to work it out.

I’m just saying that she trusted you and when everything went to shit, it hurt even more because of that.

If you thought she was closed off back then, you got a hell of a climb ahead of you now. ”

“I know I do. I have a lot of making up to do. I won’t give up on her.”

“I know you won’t.” She turns away.

“Evelyn!”

“Yes?”

“I love her.”

“Then show her.”

.

Elena

The constant beeping draws me from heavy slumber. My body aches everywhere. My temples throb like pistons in an overworked engine or a blacksmith forging iron behind my eyes.

I try to open my eyes; bright white light renders me blind and I wince at the visual invasion. I try to speak but words or sound of any sort seem to have evaded my throat, leaving only a scratchy feeling as though I’d swallowed a handful of razor blades.

I wince as I try to open my eyes up again, slowly, batting my lashes to coat my dry eyeballs with some moisture. To anyone else I must look like a nutcase attempting to flirt in whatever white hell this is.

Finally, my eyes manage to stay open but I squint against the bright light.

The beeping gets louder now that I am awake and it feels like a fucking marching band taking occupation in my skull.

The light, the sounds and what is that godawful sterile smell? All combined causes me to choke; nausea washes over me at an alarming rate.

Then… a voice. A man’s voice. I look around wild eyed. Where the hell am I?

I scan the room, eyes painfully taking in the sight. A hospital? Why? …. Urgh that voice again. What is he saying?

Pressure on my hand grabs my attention and I look down to see my hand in the clasp of another. I follow the hand, my gaze drawing up to meet the source of the voice.

“Enzo?” It comes out raspy even to my own ears. I shake my head and try again. It’s even worse this time.

His lips are moving but I can’t make out what he’s saying. The sound distorted as if he’s speaking underwater.

“-ena.”

“What?” I ask in my head because my voice still hasn’t made its arrival. His voice is muffled but getting clearer and I strain to listen.

“Elena. Baby?”

I try to answer but my throat is so dry. I clear my throat instead. Enzo nods his head knowingly and within seconds a glass with a straw is brought to my lips. I pull on the straw greedily; the cool refreshing liquid bringing soothing relief.

“Thank…” I have to clear my throat again but at least I can speak now. “Thank you.” I say finally.

“How are you feeling baby?”

“My head… is pounding.”

“I’ll get the nurse.” He’s back minutes later with a nurse.

“Hi Elena. I’m Sofia, I’ve been taking care of you since you’ve arrived. I understand you are experiencing some pain? Can you tell me where?”

“Hi.” I manage a small smile. “My head is throbbing and my body aches everywhere, especially my shoulder and…” I stop mid-sentence as the memory comes flooding back to me.

“I was shot.” It’s a whisper. Enzo is at my side in an instant.

He takes my hand in his. My eyes meet his green ones and he’s looking at me with so much emotion it makes my heart twitch.

My eyes flare wide as I think about my last words to Evie.

He must notice because he’s cradling me in his arms and cooing me.

His hands rub my back in small soothing circles. He knows.

“Shhh, it’s okay… I know. It’s okay baby, the baby is fine. You both are.”

“Miss. Reeves, I’ll give you two sometime alone and the Doctor will be in shortly to explain everything to you.”

I nod at the pretty nurse; she smiles at both of us, then leaves us alone.

I pull away from Enzo then to look at him.

“Matt?”

“In jail where he belongs.”

“Evie and Tony?”

“They were here all night. As soon as the Doctor assured us that you were fine, they went home to shower, and get some sleep. I said I’d call them when you woke up but I think you need a bit more rest.”

“Enzo, I was going to tell you about…”

“It’s okay, we can talk about it when you get out of here and come home. For now, you need to get plenty of rest. I’m not letting you out of my sight.”

“Home?”

“Yes, home, with me. Where you belong.”

“Enzo, I – I can’t go with you.”

“Yes, you can. Elena, I know you’re still angry with me; and you have every right to be, but you’ve been shot, you’re pregnant, with my child. There is no way I’m letting you go to your apartment alone.”

“I’ll be fine. We can talk about the baby and how we’re going to navigate all this when I’m well enough; but I am not going home with you.

We may be having a baby together but it doesn’t change where you and I stand.

We are done. I was going to tell you, but I needed time to come to terms with it myself first. I needed to figure out how I was going to handle this, how I was going to handle… you and I.”

“Don’t say that. Please Elena, don’t shut me out.

I love you. I love you so fucking much, it’s hard to breathe.

I need you in my life, by my side. I need you back in my life.

Give me a chance to show you what you mean to me.

Please, I’m begging you. Don’t give up on me.

We can be a family. You, me, Angelo and our baby. ”

“And Victoria? I’m sorry Enzo I know you mean well; but she will always come first. Angel is not my child, I know that.

But since you reinforced that truth, there will always be this fear that I might say or do something that will make you say it again.

It will never be me, that’s what you said.

I am not going to put myself in a situation to be reminded of that again.

I refuse to do that to myself. I took a chance on you and I own that but I will not make that mistake again.

Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me. ”

I know it’s not what he wants to hear, but I have to be honest with him. Whatever we had ended that day in this very hospital.

“It’s okay. Let’s not discuss this now. We’ll talk about our future when you’re better.

Just know that when I say we will have a future, I mean it.

I’ve given you the space I thought you needed.

Had I known about our baby, I would have never left your side; but now that I do know, rest assured, I will never stop trying to prove myself to you.

Your place is at my side Elena. I know you’ve been through a lot that you haven’t dealt with; and I know that my behaviour has reopened wounds that you’ve only just begun to heal.

I know that I let a dead woman come between us and destroy what was undoubtedly the best time of my life.

I see that now. Know this Elena, I will spend the rest of my days taking away the pain you endured at my hands. ”

His voice is raspy; a hoarse whisper filled with all the emotions I can see swirling in those green eyes.

He takes a deep breath; the sound of his inhale alone seems to breathe life into my own body.

“You want time? Done. You want space? I can give you space. You want a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen while you pour your heart out; or maybe you don’t want to talk at all and you just need someone to hold you and get you chocolate fudge brownies and a Danish slice at 2am.

I’m your guy. I can do all of that for you.

I’ll worship the ground you walk on; I’ll give you back rubs when your day has been harder than most, I’ll love you through your hurts and your frustrations.

I will love you so hard that it will be the only feeling you acknowledge anymore.

I will do anything for you because my love for you is unconditional; it’s so much deeper than anything I’ve ever felt before.

So, I’ll tell you again. I love you Elena, and I will do anything for you; but don’t ask me to give you up because I’m not willing to do that.

I have never felt so empty and alone than I did when you weren’t there.

I’ve mourned for you a million times more than I ever did Victoria.

Your absence incinerated my heart. Your name is etched on my soul, your heartbeat is my heartbeat, your smile is my smile, your pain is my pain.

I can’t do it again baby… please don’t make me live without you again. I’d rather die.”

“Enzo, I…”

“No! Don’t! Don’t say anything. I’ve said what I needed to say and I meant every single word. For now, though, you need to rest and gain your strength. You have a long road to recovery and I plan on being there every step of the way.”

What could I possibly say to that? Every word he said is all I’ve ever wanted to hear but I’m petrified of doing this again. I don’t think I could handle the rejection… again.

Enzo, takes my hand, bringing it to his lips; placing soft kisses on my knuckles. The gesture so endearing, so sweet, so vulnerable, so unlike him.

He leans down to place a soft kiss on the side of my head.

“I love you baby. Get some rest; I’ll be back to see you later.”