12. Chapter 12
Rowan
Much later, nearing midnight, Rowan and Milo were cuddled up in bed.
They had opened the window, allowing the cool sea breeze to sweep through the room.
Rowan ran hot, so anything to cool him down enough to sleep was welcome.
After a long day, he was tired, but he wanted to talk to Milo about something before they dropped off to sleep.
Really, the rising hope in his chest was so strong, he couldn’t ignore it.
The flutter of anticipation in his gut insisted on an answer, and he couldn’t possibly sleep until he at least broached the subject.
“Milo? You’ll teach the girls?”
“Hm?” Milo turned his head but didn’t flip around completely.
They were spooned together, and Milo was clearly too comfortable to move-move, which was fine by Rowan, as the moonlight cast alluring shadows across his lover’s pale skin.
“Oh, yes. I’m excited. I like teaching. I don’t really get much chance to do it, though. ”
Rowan could see how he’d be good at it. He had a way of breaking things down so the listener understood, and he was very patient.
He’d experienced this himself, as Milo had constantly paused and explained what he was doing with the wards.
They couldn’t have found a better teacher for the twins if they’d had five years to do the search.
What Rowan was really getting at, though, was something else. “So you really will stay?”
Milo did turn then, his eyes snaring Rowan’s. “The only way I’m leaving is if you tell me to go.” His tone was soft, hand gentle as he brushed a thumb over Rowan’s cheek.
“I cannot imagine ever saying those words to you.” Rowan meant every word. He couldn’t imagine ever looking at this man and not wanting him by his side. Such a thing was inconceivable. “The last thing I want is for you to leave.”
“Such sweet words.” Milo levered up enough to kiss him, his lips soft with affection. “I don’t want to leave.”
Good, then he’d stay. That was all Rowan really wanted.
Did he appreciate Milo offering to teach his nieces?
Improve the quality of life up here? Help guard and heal his people and family?
Of course. But it was because Milo was this generous man that Rowan was falling for him so quickly. “You’re that sure.”
“I am. It’s not just you—although you are a major part of my decision, obviously—but it’s everyone else.
I realize this is weird to say, as I haven’t been up here very long, but I feel like I’ve finally found home.
Does that make sense? I’ve found a place where I’m accepted unconditionally.
I adore your family, and they’ve been so welcoming to me.
I love everyone who lives here, as they’ve greeted me like I’m a long-lost friend coming back to them.
I don’t need to check myself or hide some part of myself around any of you.
You just take me as I am.” Milo’s voice grew a bit choked, and he had to pause and breathe.
“It’s a priceless gift. I know, in my gut, I’m supposed to be here. My heart agrees. I’m home.”
“Yes,” Rowan said softly, kissing his forehead, basking in this moment.
He had desperately hoped Milo would like Gravegarde enough to stay.
What he hadn’t expected was for Milo, after only a week, to become so attached he couldn’t even dream of leaving.
It assuaged the part of Rowan’s heart holding doubts, whispering that Milo would eventually get frustrated enough to leave.
Rowan had suspected one of the reasons why Milo jumped into dating him was because he felt lonely, and the second Rowan showed him any kindness, Milo took the chance.
Rowan understood the impulse, he truly did, as he’d sometimes felt crushed under the weight of his own loneliness.
He’d told himself from the start that all he could do was give Milo support and affection and provide him with the right place to heal.
Hearing that Milo loved it here was one of the best gifts his lover could ever offer him. “Yes, you very much are.”
Milo snuck a kiss, eyes shining. Even in the soft light, his eyes were a touch too bright with tears, but mostly it was his heart that shone through. “The second I’m done with the wards, I’ll put in for a permanent transfer.”
“Before winter, then, let’s go to Goldguard. Pack you up, officially move you here.”
“Sounds wonderful. It’s a plan. I need to get more supplies anyway, to teach the girls, if nothing else, but also to really set up a proper workspace here.”
“What about Ethel?”
“She’ll be fine. She’s got three grandkids to keep track of her.
I do want to visit her, though, before I move up here permanently.
I’ll stay in touch with her via mirror.” Milo snuggled in with a happy sigh.
“One of the things I like best about you is how directly you communicate with me. I’m never in doubt of how you feel, of what you want. It’s blissful.”
Admittedly, Rowan had learned the hard way how to communicate with a partner. He’d been terrible at it with the first few people he’d tried to date. With Milo, he made more of an effort, true, but he also found it easier to communicate with Milo than anyone who’d come before him.
Now that he was thinking about it, all of those previous exes had also struggled with proper communication. They’d just blamed him for it. He and Milo communicated fine and it didn’t feel like a strain or a chore. Which said something.
Milo was growing more secure in his affection for him, slowly putting Rowan’s insecurities to rest, and it elated Rowan.
He didn’t know if it was solely due to his own efforts, but he’d keep them up regardless.
He never, ever wanted Milo to feel unloved.
Gods above, he didn’t want that. Not when this man had so much to give.
Rowan snugged him in a little more. “I like talking to you.”
The wide wonder on Milo’s face tugged at his heartstrings. Rowan knew Milo had been told by others, often, that he was annoying, and Rowan wanted to punch all of them. Milo wasn’t annoying. A chatterbox, sure. But annoying? How could anyone think that?
Feeling like he had to reinforce this, he emphasized, “You’re fun to talk to. I don’t always know what to say. I’m grateful you do, and you can start the conversation.”
Milo blinked back tears, looking away.
But Rowan wasn’t stopping there. “Milo, I like you. I’m falling in love with you. There isn’t a single part of you I would change. Not your looks, your personality, your insane appetite, nothing. I want more of you, not less.”
“I fell for you so hard and fast my head’s still spinning,” Milo whispered. The words were a little hoarse and choked sounding. “I’m stupidly happy you’re you.”
Now Rowan really couldn’t hold himself in check.
He was tired, yes, but he needed to show this amazing man just how much he was wanted.
They were naked anyway, so it didn’t take much to flip Milo onto his back, maneuver on top of him, and trail his mouth down the man’s neck, lightly sucking here and there.
“Mm, I just made you very happy, I take it.”
“Very,” Rowan agreed seriously.
“And now you’re going to show me just how happy.”
“Probably multiple times.”
Milo grinned up at him as he pulled him closer. “That goes both ways.”
They likely wouldn’t get much sleep tonight.
Rowan really could not care less if he was sleep deprived tomorrow. Cementing this man’s affection, showing Milo just how much he was adored, was definitely the higher priority.
They were indeed sleep deprived the next day, but neither regretted it.
Rowan had something of a spring in his step as he went about his duties.
It was a pretty day, with clear skies and a warmer temperature than normal.
The perfect weather made a good morning even better.
He took Milo a snack after lunch, which was becoming a habit, but this might be the last time he did it. For this particular job, at least.
The first ward was practically done.
With Bennet helping Milo, the job had moved along a lot faster. Mage Nottle had finished inscribing the last corner of the fortress, which saved Milo a full day of work, easily.
Milo still had the outer ward to set up, of course, as he wanted to connect the eight watchtowers with a ward that would encompass the town and immediate surroundings, but the fortress ward would be completed by end of day.
It was a huge weight off his shoulders to have the fortress properly warded. Rowan knew Milo had pushed himself, wanting to take the stress off Rowan, and he felt immensely grateful.
Rowan was standing in the northernmost watchtower when he saw the ward visibly snap into place over the fortress, like a dome.
It was so obviously right, nothing like the paper-thin ward it had been before.
This was opaque, milky white, almost difficult to see through—exactly as a ward should look, at least in the beginning.
Over time it would fade and not be so hard to see through.
His heart leapt in his chest. So excited he couldn’t contain himself, he went back down the several flights of stairs and ran the short distance back to the fortress, searching out Milo.
Rowan had just entered the boundary of the ward when he spotted Milo, not far away at all and standing with Advocate Nottle.
At a lope, he crossed to his lover, and the second he was in range, he bear-hugged the stuffing out of him.
Milo squeaked as his feet left earth, then laughed. “I know you’re super happy.”
“Super,” Rowan agreed adamantly. Feeling like he was being rude, he tacked on to Nottle, “Thank you.”
“I’m happy to assist.” Advocate Nottle regarded them thoughtfully. “Milo told me he wants a permanent station up here. I can see why, as frankly, your entire family has folded him in like he’s part of them.”
He was. It was as simple as that.