Chapter Eight #3
He could have lifted the hauberk away. But instead, his green eyes caught hers in invitation. Carice was fully aware of his hands tracing her silhouette, gently skimming her flesh as he moved higher.
Her attention grew fixated upon his mouth.
She wanted him to kiss her again, the way he had only yesterday.
Desire flowed through her, and she craved more from this man.
She leaned closer to him, reaching out to touch his forearms. His skin was hot, his muscles tight as he drew the armor over her head.
She was relieved to be rid of the heavy weight, but the léine she wore was too thin to offer any protection from the cold.
She shivered, crossing her arms over her breasts.
Inwardly, her thoughts were in turmoil. She wanted this man in a way she’d never anticipated.
And though it was an immoral, terrifying thought, she wanted his touch upon her skin.
Something about this Norman soldier transformed her from quiet and sickly into a woman who craved a different life.
With each day she spent at his side, she felt stronger, more whole.
He was still going to leave her behind—she had to remember that.
Raine moved to her horse and reached inside the leather pouch to find her overdress. She watched him, wondering if he was having the same thoughts.
He tossed the gown to her and turned his back once more. “Clothe yourself, Lady Carice.”
Apparently she was wrong. Her cheeks flushed with embarrassment as she dressed quickly, struggling to remove the trews. When she had finished, she told him, “You can turn around now.”
Raine took the armor and folded it, placing it inside another saddle bag.
Then he found a flask of water and drank for a moment, passing it to her.
She sipped the water, wondering if she had imagined the desire between them.
He had kissed her the morning he’d been in chains and had agreed to come with her on this journey.
But now, it seemed that he was trying to keep her at a distance.
Did he feel any attraction at all toward her?
“You need to eat,” he said, returning to the saddle bag. Her cheeks warmed, and she was all too conscious of her thin frame. Her illness was as unpredictable as the rain, and she could never tell if it would be a good day or a bad one.
Raine brought out a cloth-wrapped bundle of food.
Inside was half a wheel of cheese, slices of beef, and dried cherries.
She stood near him, and he tore off a piece of meat, passing it to her.
The food tasted delicious, and she savored every bite.
The ground was too cold and wet to sit down, so they both remained standing.
Raine held out the cloth bundle between them.
“You seem to be feeling better,” he said. “From earlier, I mean.”
“I am still tired,” she admitted, “but my stomach doesn’t hurt so much.”
He ate some of the cheese and passed it to her. “Has it always been this way? Do you not eat because it hurts?”
She shrugged, reaching for more of the beef.
“When I was younger, it wasn’t this bad.
It was only during the last year when it hurt every day to eat.
” She had grown to loathe mealtimes, for it only brought pain and suffering.
Whenever her father hosted a feast, she tried to avoid them, for every time she ate, she grew ill.
“Could someone have been poisoning you?” he prompted. “Someone who wanted you to die?”
She shook her head. “Others ate the food that I could not bear to touch. The healer tried everything to help me. He bled me, he tried teas. Nothing worked.” Just remembering those days made her stomach ache.
But despite her certainty that it wasn’t poison, she couldn’t help but wonder why some of her symptoms had lessened after she’d left Carrickmeath.
Was it simply that she’d felt suffocated at home, surrounded by healers and her father’s overprotective ways?
Was it this taste of freedom that had made her want to embrace whatever time remained?
She didn’t know. But the longer she spent time with Raine, the more she felt as if a burden had been lifted from her shoulders.
She would not have to endure a marriage to the High King and a wedding night. Here, with Raine, she was free.
Between them, they finished the rest of the food, and Raine took her hand. “Come. We’ll ride toward the village and find a place to sleep for a few hours.”
He helped her to mount her horse, and they rode through the forest for a time. The food and rest had made her feel better, as well as being free of the chain mail armor. “I don’t know how soldiers endure that armor, day after day,” she remarked. “It’s impossibly heavy.”
“We grow accustomed to it. Sometimes I hardly notice the weight.”
She lowered her gaze, thinking of his muscular form.
As strong as Raine was, undoubtedly the armor weight was hardly more than a cloak to him.
She recalled the silhouette of his hardened skin and the reddened scars upon his back.
Despite all that he’d suffered, she’d been fascinated by his bare skin.
A secret smile passed over her face, for they were naught but idle daydreams. She knew better than to imagine Raine would ever be attracted to a dying woman.
He believed she was too thin, and her illness made him uncomfortable.
So be it. But she intended to savor every moment of life that remained, seizing what joy she could.
Raine continued leading the horse northward, and when they reached the edge of the woods, she spied a narrow frozen stream.
It reminded her of a time when she was younger and had loved to play upon the ice.
Her brother Killian had taught her to glide on skates made of deer antlers, and they had raced one another upon the pond.
Although he had won every race, she’d loved the feeling of gliding across the hard surface of the frozen ice.
“How close are we to the village?” she asked, wondering if there was time to stop.
“A few miles more. We’ll be there by nightfall.”
Raine kept his pace swift, seemingly intent upon reaching shelter quickly. He certainly would have no interest in stopping—especially for a reason as foolish as a moment of fun.
But with her time slipping away, Carice no longer wanted to live her life doing what was expected.
The food had given her a new energy, and while she was feeling good, she wanted a chance to enjoy it, even for a few reckless moments.
Certainly Raine de Garenne would believe she had lost her senses, but she didn’t care.
“I want to stop for a moment,” she told him, bringing her horse to a halt. Then she swung down and stepped toward the ice.
Raine stopped immediately, wondering if Carice was about to be sick. He drew his horse to a halt and dismounted, releasing the reins. “What is it?”
She turned back and sent him a secret smile. “Only an impulse.”
He didn’t know what she meant by that, but it didn’t seem that she was feeling unwell. He watched her for a moment before he dismounted.
Snow blanketed the stream banks, and Carice trudged through it, moving toward the frozen stream. The water was hardly a stream at all, only twice the length of his arm. He doubted if it came up to his knees when it wasn’t frozen solid.
She approached the stream and touched the ice gingerly with one foot. He couldn’t, for the life of him, figure out what she was doing. Was she thirsty?
“What is it?” he asked.
This time, she stepped on the ice and turned back to look at him. “Killian and I used to race upon the ice when we were young.”
He continued staring at her, not understanding at all. Was she suggesting that they stop their travels to...run upon ice?
She beckoned to him. “Come here, Raine.”
He shook his head. “You’re going to fall and get hurt.” What she was suggesting was not only a waste of time, it was also dangerous.
“It’s only ice. It doesn’t hurt that badly. Or I may fall into the snowbank.” She crooked her finger to him. “I’ll wager that you can’t beat me in a race.”
Why on earth would she want to race? She hardly had the strength to walk, much less run. He dismissed the idea immediately. “We don’t have time for this. Your father—”
“My father would have to ride for hours to catch up to us. And it will only be for a little while. Unless you think I’m going to win? Or perhaps you’re too frightened of the ice?”
It was a bold dare, and the teasing look she shot him was bewildering. He hadn’t seen this mischievous side to her before. When he reached the frozen stream, he stepped carefully onto the ice, amazed that it didn’t shatter or break beneath their weight.
“What is your wager?” he asked.
“Whoever reaches that bank first can choose the reward.”
He sent her a sidelong glance, wondering what she meant by that. There was nothing he could give her, and he couldn’t see any point to this.
“I do not need anything from you.” He started to step back toward the snowbank, but she caught his hand and pulled back.
“You’re assuming you’re going to win.”
Of course he would. “You’ve been ill,” he reminded her. “We’ve been riding for hours, and you need to preserve your strength.”
She looked back at him, and in her eyes, he saw the look of a woman whose days were numbered. “I want to enjoy the time I have left, Raine. Before it’s gone forever.”
The thought of her dying was a reminder he hadn’t wanted to face. He might not know Carice very well, but he knew how hard she’d fought to live. He’d watched her suffer, and he’d seen her smile. He knew the taste of her lips and the softness of her body in sleep.
“Only for a moment,” he acceded. “But you’re going to lose.”
She ignored his prediction and said, “Killian and I used to place wagers in return for power.”
He frowned at that. “What do you mean?”
“If I won, I gave him commands for an hour. If he won, he told me what to do, and I had to obey.”
Though he knew she was speaking of children ordering each other around, her suggestion made his wayward thoughts grow stronger. The idea was wicked, and he ought to tell her no. But he held his silence instead.
“Are you ready?” she murmured.
“We’re both going to break our necks,” he predicted. But when she gave the signal, he began sliding his feet across the ice, struggling to run. His feet went flying out from under him, and he hit the ice hard while she continued sliding one foot, then the other, in a steady pace.
“Are you all right?” she asked, grinning at him. Her brown hair had fallen loose from its plait, and it tousled around her face. There was a brightness in her light blue eyes, and she continued moving forward.
Raine got back to his feet and took longer strides, attempting to catch up to her. When he reached her side, she tried to push him down, but he maintained his balance.
“No cheating,” he warned. But as he spoke the words, he pushed back against her, moving ahead. Almost there...
At the last moment, she leaped from the ice back into the snowbank. She raced ahead of him, running through the drifts until she reached the end of the ice. “I won.”
He was incredulous at her declaration. “No, you didn’t. You left the ice.”
“I never said we had to stay on the ice,” she countered. “You made that assumption.”
Her brazen cheating made him determined to claim the victory. “You cannot win by breaking the rules.”
“Do you mean to say you won’t follow my orders?
” She reached out for his hand, leading him off the ice.
From the tone of her voice, his suspicions sharpened.
He tightened his palm around hers and lifted her back onto the horse.
Her face was flushed from the exertion, and in that moment, she looked like a woman who had just awakened from sleep.
“What orders?” he asked, mounting his own horse.
She sent him a secretive smile and answered, “I’ll tell you later.”