Chapter 8 #3
We eventually made it to the back area, where it felt like it was a party going on out here.
Dee had his grills out, and you could see the smoke in the air from the ribs that he was cooking up.
He had a small team of men with him, so there were about three men out here that were working as well.
A big speaker system was playing some R the role that I’m trying to have in your life, I want it to be the opposite of what everyone else gets.
Shit, I’m trying to be the nigga that you pillow talk with, and listen to you tell me all your dreams, and goals before they become your reality.
I’m not trying to be on the same level as anyone else in your life,” I said some real shit to her, and like it was just a bunch of bullshit that I was spitting, she rolled her eyes at me.
“I see why those hoes let you fuck. You talk a good game,” she said.
“I let you meet my mama, love. Where them niggas do that at in the players handbook?” I asked, picking my hands up, and I put each hand on her waist.
She jumped at my touch, and I thought that she was going to tell me to move, or even slap my hands away from her, but she didn’t do any of that. She allowed me to continue touching her, and all I could think was how soft her skin was.
“I feel like that doesn’t really count though. You had your girlfriend at my niece’s party,” she was back to bringing that shit up.
“You can’t use that as an example. That wasn’t my family.
It would have been different if I brought her around my family, but that’s not what I did.
I let you meet my mama. The day I let you meet Noir, I’m probably going to be in love,” I let her know, and she did that thing again where she rolled her eyes at me.
“You been in love before?” she wanted to know.
“Nah,” I was truthful.
“How you going to know that you’re in love then?” she inquired.
“I feel like niggas start moving different when they in love with their chick. Start doing shit that they never did before. Ima use my nigga June for example. I know Free isn’t home, but if I wasn’t with you right now, and I was at the crib chilling, and I hit him, telling him to come outside to a strip club or something with me, he would have probably told me no because he’s in the crib with his wife.
The old June would have broken his fuckin neck to get inside a strip club.
Niggas move different when they care about their woman, and when they’re in love with her.
I’ve never fucked a woman without a rubber.
The day I slide in without one, I’m probably in love like a motha fucka because I don’t move like that.
The day I allow a woman to come to my home, where I actually lay my head, then that’ll show that I’m in love too.
You gotta understand that I spent a lot of years in the streets, and even though I’m legit, I still have a street mentality.
When a nigga lives with a street mentality, it’s hard for them to let their guard down, so the day I let my guard down, I know that I’m all in,” I shared some real shit with her.
“What about you? You ever been in love?” I wanted to know.
“I have daddy issues, so I love every guy that I’ve ever been with,” she was truthful.
“But were you in love with those niggas though?” I asked.
“I was in love with what they could do for me. Basically, what I’m gathering from this conversation is that when you’re in love, you tend to do things that’ll typically be out of the norm for you.
For example, I don’t really know if I want children.
I’ll be 40 in three years, so to be honest, I probably don’t want kids.
I haven’t dealt with a man yet that has made me feel any differently.
I haven’t been so far gone in love to the point that I will willingly allow a man to put a baby in me,” she voiced, and I smiled at that.