Chapter 7 #4
Her chest heaved as Caroline’s flood of words hit her, tears burning her eyes as she blinked them back. She refused to give Caroline the satisfaction of making her cry. Annie was stronger than that.
“You haven’t told anyone what I did,” she whispered, taking a deep breath. “That I cheated on you.”
Annie felt those words like an achingly slow twist of a blade in her stomach. “Because I wasn’t raised to make a scene!” Her voice rose slightly as she tried to keep her anger in check.
“You’re mad at me,” Caroline continued, the knife rotating with each of her words.
“You have every right in the world to be angry. What I did to you was—” She inhaled deeply, eyelids fluttering shut for a moment.
“It was a terrible thing. You need time. I get that. I want you to take all the time you need, but I think you and I can move past this. I think this can make us stronger.” Caroline reached for her hands, taking them in hers.
“Don’t throw away the last seven years because of one mistake. ”
Annie breathed deeply through her nostrils, searching amber eyes silently pleading with her.
She wondered if there was some truth to what Caroline was saying.
At first, the shame and embarrassment of it all was too fresh, too raw, too much to handle.
But then that feeling faded, replaced by wave after wave of silent rage.
But even then, even when her anger pulsed through her like fire in her veins, she still kept Caroline’s secret. Why?
Seeing Caroline here, like this, pleading with her, was such a strange juxtaposition to the silent roles their relationship had held.
Roles Annie hadn’t even realized had been there until she executed her post-mortem in the days following their breakup.
She had obsessively analyzed every moment, every interaction, every clue she may have missed that would have indicated what Caroline had been hiding.
The more she looked, the more she didn’t like what she found.
She wanted to be done with this conversation. Didn’t want to sit face to face with any of this, not tonight of all nights. Annie wanted to get tipsy on eggnog and eat way too many spinach puffs while quietly judging the hell out of people.
“Did you move back here to win me back?” she asked, yanking her hands out of Caroline’s grasp.
“Yes.”
Annie raised a challenging eyebrow. “Yes, and?”
Caroline held her gaze, inhaling sharply.
“As I said, plans change. Daddy’s had some health issues pop up in the last month—you know he hates going to the doctors.
He won’t be running for reelection as town commissioner this year.
I’m planning to run, but you need to be a resident for at least six months to be eligible.
It was always the plan we talked about—coming back here to settle down and raise a family.
The timeline and order of events simply got moved around a bit. ”
Annie sighed, the flashes of the life that had felt within reach a few months ago playing in her mind. They had felt so clear, so crisp, so attainable. But then that bubble burst and the illusion of their love shattered. She nodded, rolling her shoulders back, mustering all of her courage.
“I’m sorry to hear your dad’s been having health problems,” she started, her voice surprisingly level.
“I hope for your family’s sake things get figured out.
” Annie inhaled deeply. “I hope you have a successful election. It’s always been your dream to follow in your father’s footsteps.
I still want you to have your dreams.” Caroline’s face fell, understanding dawning.
“I meant it when I said we were done, Caroline. I am angry—that part you were right about, but I don’t need time to think because I know I’ll always end up at the same conclusion.
That we’re done. I need you to accept that. ”
Caroline stared at her for an uncomfortably long moment, the muffled party noises mixing with the finality of Annie’s words hanging in the space between them.
“Okay,” she said, her words like a whirlwind as she stepped away from Annie, her voice pitchy. “Okay—I. Um, wow. Okay. This is really happening.”
Annie nodded, her ponytail moving across the back of her neck. “It is. Because of you.” She had meant her words to hurt. Wanted them to sting, hoped they would cut Caroline in the same ways she had cut her. Did wanting that make her awful?
Caroline took another step back, and then another. Reaching for the doorknob, she slipped out into the hall without another word.
Annie released a long exhale, hands curling around the edge of the dresser, listening intently for any sound of Caroline still lingering in the hallway.
After a few long moments, she moved quietly to her bed, reaching for not one, but two pillows.
Stacking them one on top of the other, she lifted them to her face where she let out one long scream of anger muffled by the down and party noises below.
She screamed again and again until slowly but surely, the steam settled.
With a deep breath, she set the pillows back on the bed, giving them an extra fluff. She crossed the room, stopping only to touch up her makeup, slipping through the door to rejoin the party below.
She descended the stairs, reentering the kitchen, her eyes landing on her brother, Jack, and Max’s perfect ass standing around the kitchen island.
“Speak of the devil.” Jack beamed, running a hand through his mess of dark hair as Annie stepped up to the counter next to Max.
From the waist down, Max looked like a disco ball in shiny black pants, tiny sequins catching light from every direction.
She paired the pants with a chunky wine-red sweater and a complementary dark lipstick, the depth of the hue making her pale blue eyes pop even more than usual.
“I love the pants,” Annie said earnestly.
A smile tugged at the corner of Max’s mouth that made Annie want to figure out exactly how to get a full one from her.
“So yeah, we’re just gonna go…” Drew trailed off, steering Jack away from them and off into the depths of the party.
They stood there quietly for a moment before being interrupted by one of the caterers entering the space with an empty tray.
“You okay?” Max asked quietly. “We all saw Caroline come downstairs.”
Annie tilted her head, searching Max’s gaze, seeing nothing but genuine care.
“I’m okay,” she answered. “Four months down, three to go.” She echoed the timeline to healing Max had mentioned the previous month at the club, the same one she had latched onto as she tried to figure out the impossible task of pivoting her life completely from the path she had envisioned for herself.
“Did Drew tell you about the chocolates?” Annie asked.
“First I’m hearing about chocolates.” Max grinned, taking the last sip from the glass of wine in front of her.
“Come with me,” Annie said, taking a split second to rethink her next move but ultimately deciding to be brave as she slid her hand into Max’s, pulling her towards the sun room at the back of the house—which was thankfully empty.
This room was Annie’s favorite, especially at Christmas.
The wall-to-wall windowed room with the slanted ceiling felt like one large greenhouse, glowing with soft lighting and plants and Annie’s favorite Christmas tree—the one with all white lights and handmade ornaments made by herself and her siblings.
She dropped Max’s hand, instantly missing the heat of it in hers as she peered between the branches of the tree, searching for her prize.
“Here,” she said a moment later, producing a tiny bag filled with chocolate golden coins.
“Each tree has a few bags. If you find the pickle ornament, you get $100.”
“Chocolate and money, sign me up.” Max winked, taking the bag from Annie. “But why a pickle?”
“No idea.” Annie shrugged, looking up into Max’s eyes, her chin angling down slightly. She swayed, her body leaning into Max’s personal space before she had the sense to pivot away, turning her attention back to the tree and the search for chocolate.
They each searched top to bottom, and a few moments later, Max’s triumphant call rang out.
“Oh! Found one.” She reached across Annie, plunging her arm into the tree, their shoulders bumping.
“Look.” Max wiggled the little bag in front of her, showing off her prize when Annie spotted it.
The tiny glint of metallic green amongst the prickly pine needles.
“Great job,” she said, pressing up onto her tiptoes and leaning forward, definitely in Max’s personal space now. “But you lost sight of the long game.” Annie breathed those words hot against Max’s cheek as she reached into the tree, producing a tiny green pickle topped with a Santa hat.
Max stood rooted to the spot, eyes wide and pupils blown, before she snapped back to reality. And that only pleased Annie more, knowing she could still have that effect on a woman.
“Well, shit. Big pay day for you.” A grin spread across Max’s dark red lips.
Annie shook her head, smiling. “Not for me. For you.” She pressed the pickle into the palm of Max’s hand. “Merry Christmas, Max.”